so i haven't done this for real in a while but...
it's so strange to see how unattached from brighton some people can be. not just people on lj, but people in general. here i am, back at school with my great friends here, but already i'm counting the days until i get to return home for almost two months. i would never have thought i'd want to get back to rochester so badly. but i do. i would settle for just the people from rochester, but there's no way all of us could get together anywhere but the roc.
this is just me crazy rambling. and as you can see, i'm horrible with articulating how i feel, but i just felt as close to whole as i can be for the first time in a long time. i got to experience an amazing vacation with my family who i am in love with, and then go home to the fab five and pmrw. i missed the boys so.much. it's so nice to have 4 or 5 big brothers looking out for you.
and my girls. i can't even scratch the surface of what you mean to me. but you all know this, from the many times we've tried to put into words our rediculous bond. the closest i can think of was salena's description of the five of us sharing one soul.
i loved these past two weeks. loved loved loved. and now i'm here. it hadn't even been 24 hours since i'd been here and something goes completely wrong. i feel like every time i leave home something else horrible happens. i feel like every time the phone rings it's going to be bad news. and i can't help but shake this feeling no matter how hard i try. i hope something isn't seriously wrong with me.
everyone keeps telling me that it will all be okay, to keep going and keep living life to its fullest. and i'm trying, but i just can't help but feel empty and sad when i'm here. i'm so far away from so many people that mean so much to me and it kills me when something happens to them and i can't do anything. i wish i could just be everywhere. or invent that bubble ktg and i dreamed up back in junior year of high school.
if you're reading this, even if i haven't talked to you in a while, i love you. and y'know what? i even love you if you're not reading this. so there.
this is just me crazy rambling. and as you can see, i'm horrible with articulating how i feel, but i just felt as close to whole as i can be for the first time in a long time. i got to experience an amazing vacation with my family who i am in love with, and then go home to the fab five and pmrw. i missed the boys so.much. it's so nice to have 4 or 5 big brothers looking out for you.
and my girls. i can't even scratch the surface of what you mean to me. but you all know this, from the many times we've tried to put into words our rediculous bond. the closest i can think of was salena's description of the five of us sharing one soul.
i loved these past two weeks. loved loved loved. and now i'm here. it hadn't even been 24 hours since i'd been here and something goes completely wrong. i feel like every time i leave home something else horrible happens. i feel like every time the phone rings it's going to be bad news. and i can't help but shake this feeling no matter how hard i try. i hope something isn't seriously wrong with me.
everyone keeps telling me that it will all be okay, to keep going and keep living life to its fullest. and i'm trying, but i just can't help but feel empty and sad when i'm here. i'm so far away from so many people that mean so much to me and it kills me when something happens to them and i can't do anything. i wish i could just be everywhere. or invent that bubble ktg and i dreamed up back in junior year of high school.
if you're reading this, even if i haven't talked to you in a while, i love you. and y'know what? i even love you if you're not reading this. so there.