jerk jerk jerk
i don't even know what to say...i just...i mean...who the hell is he to judge me...i didn’t insult him in anyway…all i did was fool around with a guy…why does he get to yell at me and call me names…so it didn’t mean anything…so what…so he decides that he doesn’t want to talk to me because he thinks im easy…im not easy, most of the time…it’s just…people automatically assume that im easy and they push and they push and they push…and im sory but im tired of pushing back…so what if I gave up…gave in…so wut if i did something stupid…so what if it’s something that i will regret…so what if he’s completely right… damn i hate that he’s right...why does he have to be right…okay i admit it…what he’s saying makes since…but doesn’t he realize that I already kno that…that i already feel like shit…like less than shit…doesn’t he realize that I never wanted to tell him…that I never would have told him…that if he just hadn’t kept pushing me I never would have told him…I never told him to ask me what happened…but he did…I said no…he said to tell him anyway…so I did…is it my fault that he didn’t like what he heard…that my answers miss pleased him…so sue me…so im not perfect…well neither is he…he has no right to judge me…I know that what I did wasn’t good…I know that it makes me sound easy…but…god…he was my friend…friends are supposed to tell you that everything will be okay…that life will go on…that it wasn’t that big of a deal…that you probably shouldn’t ever do it again…they are not supposed to say that your easy…that they don’t talk to people like you…that now they can’t talk to you…that you need to change, or they wont talk to you…he was my friend…so why would he do this…why would he hurt me this way…I thought he cared about me…I thought that we were friends…friends don’t do this to friends…friends don’t make you feel this bad…friends don’t make you cry and then just leave you alone…I was crying and he left me…im sory he said but I don’t talk to whores…I was crying and he left me…I would never have left him…I stood by him when his dad got sick…I let him yell and scream at me about his dad…I let him talk to me…but when I talk to him…suddenly its too much…suddenly he doesn’t want to talk to me…well let him just find someone who is willing to put up with all his crap…cuz im not doing it anymore…I don’t care if he calls later or comes by and says he’s sory…I don’t care…I won’t talk to him…because now im mad…no im pissed off…actually im effing livid…effing asshole is what he is...EFFING ASSHOLE...I mean he was my friend for god’s sake…was…he was my friend…does this mean that we’re not friends…I liked being friends…but what kind of friend does this…not a good friend…and I have no need for crappy friends…I guess we’re not friends.. i feel like shit...like less than shit...and now I don’t have a friend to talk to…one bad decision and everything falls apart…im going to go finish crying now…leave a message at the beep…BEEP!