Women talk & Secret sufferings
My generation of women is one caught in time. We do not have a safe circle of women with whom to discuss things of intimate and personal nature. On the one hand we think of ourselves as too "liberated" for the giggling sessions before weddings where such topics come up. But on the other hand, we're not liberated enough to really be able to have these discussions candidly with friends either. Contrary to what women of our generation like to believe - there is actually a lot to talk about.
Instead so many of us secretly suffer.
Sexuality and the body are only two such topics. Marriage, intimacy and various aspects of relationships are linked to these. But there are also a host of other normally taboo topics. Breast feeding, child bearing, and some aspects of parenting / mothering as well. Sexual repression begins as early as when our mothers & fathers do not refer to some of our body parts, or do not allow us, even as babies, to explore our own bodies.
This isn't just a concern for women. Gay people have long known how irksome sexual repression & discussion can be. Indeed it can seriously threaten the quality of one's life. All we know are the media images and we all feel abnormal or inadequate if we do not compare favorably. So spilling the light on taboo topics - whether it is homosexuality or our own sexuality, or breast feeding or child bearing, or erectile disfunction or even other normally taboo topics is very key to the comfort of some and the self acceptance of many. It is often the first catalyzing step towards diagnosis and therefore cure.
It is ironic how sexually repressed we really are. On the one hand our specieal propagation depends on our sexual health. And on the other hand it is the least talked about subject, topping even religion & politics.
Although there are some venues for discussion, there is much suffering that will continue because of how closed some topics have to be in society. And we are today quite fortunate to have the internet - which we can use to connect to others, but also to look up our conditions and give names and descriptions to things that we would otherwise be unable to even think about for ourselves.
We have moved away from our homes and long standing communities. Our women relatives are far away in geography and in our hearts. Our safe circles are eroding without being replaced satisfactorily. Sometimes we only find people in intoxicated conversations.
I am grateful for the women in my life who form unconnected dots in my own circle. The women who've talked to me, who've listened to me and who I have been able to trust, both while sober as well as while drunk. I encourage everyone to take time to identify the people in your life and be grateful for them, or to seek them out for all the holes in your heart that have been hurt by the mists of social taboo.
Instead so many of us secretly suffer.
Sexuality and the body are only two such topics. Marriage, intimacy and various aspects of relationships are linked to these. But there are also a host of other normally taboo topics. Breast feeding, child bearing, and some aspects of parenting / mothering as well. Sexual repression begins as early as when our mothers & fathers do not refer to some of our body parts, or do not allow us, even as babies, to explore our own bodies.
This isn't just a concern for women. Gay people have long known how irksome sexual repression & discussion can be. Indeed it can seriously threaten the quality of one's life. All we know are the media images and we all feel abnormal or inadequate if we do not compare favorably. So spilling the light on taboo topics - whether it is homosexuality or our own sexuality, or breast feeding or child bearing, or erectile disfunction or even other normally taboo topics is very key to the comfort of some and the self acceptance of many. It is often the first catalyzing step towards diagnosis and therefore cure.
It is ironic how sexually repressed we really are. On the one hand our specieal propagation depends on our sexual health. And on the other hand it is the least talked about subject, topping even religion & politics.
Although there are some venues for discussion, there is much suffering that will continue because of how closed some topics have to be in society. And we are today quite fortunate to have the internet - which we can use to connect to others, but also to look up our conditions and give names and descriptions to things that we would otherwise be unable to even think about for ourselves.
We have moved away from our homes and long standing communities. Our women relatives are far away in geography and in our hearts. Our safe circles are eroding without being replaced satisfactorily. Sometimes we only find people in intoxicated conversations.
I am grateful for the women in my life who form unconnected dots in my own circle. The women who've talked to me, who've listened to me and who I have been able to trust, both while sober as well as while drunk. I encourage everyone to take time to identify the people in your life and be grateful for them, or to seek them out for all the holes in your heart that have been hurt by the mists of social taboo.