I Love Maury!!! haha
Maury has got to be the best show in the world. Of course, all he ever does is paternity tests. But I just think it is so hilarious when you hear "Bob, you are NOT the father." Then you always know what's coming next. The guy gets up and dances or rolls around on the floor in happiness, yelling "I told you so, bitch!" or whore, or slut, or something around that word-frame. Never anything intelligent, of course! And the woman gets up, SCREAMS AT THE TOP OF HER LUNGS... begins crying hysterically and shoots down the hallway. So, she's in the back, cameras behind her, and she THROWS herself on the floor. Not falling gently on the floor, but like SLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM! I think it's great.
Or the test results come back and "Joe, you ARE the father." Where the guy says "yeah, ya know, I'm gonna be a father, I'm gonna do what's right" ... YEAH, after 20 minutes of "THERE IS NO WAY THAT BABY IS MINE!! NO WAY! ANGIE IS A HO AND SLEPT WITH EVERY GUY IN TEXAS! ANY GUY COULD BE THAT BABY! ANGIE, WHEN THE TEST RESULTS SAY THAT BABY AINT MINE, YOU NEED TO LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!" And his girlfriend is besides him yelling yeah the whole time. So, then, of course, he's gonna take care of the baby? Uh huh. Let him take care of that baby. Good luck with that. And the girl is either dancing her little "I told you so, nigggaaaaaa" dance or hugging him and telling him she forgives him. Haha.
This show is the highlight of my days.