The changing face of family
So somebody did a study that found that married couples make up a smaller and smaller percentage of society. The same study also found that our generation is taking longer and longer to leave home, marry, and procreate. Today, this fellow wrote a letter to the editor in the Herald. His letter:
I'm writing in reference to recent articles about the state of the family in Canadian society.
I firmly believe that the foundation of any healthy, vibrant culture is the family. By this I mean the traditional husband, wife and children type of family.
Men and women were meant to be together in a marriage. A marriage provides a stable environment for children.
Children need to see their parents working together to solve problems in a way that is full of love, respect and commitment to one another.
This will help children to form healthy relationships with friends, employers, others in society and eventually their own spouses.
When you mess with the traditional family you are messing with the foundation of society and putting it at risk of failure. You don't have to be too smart to know what will happen if people don't get married and have enough kids.
You can basically put your culture on the endangered species list.
Already on this list are the cultures of Japan, Italy, Germany and pretty much all of Europe, and throw Canada in there as well. So come people, grow up, get married and have some kids.
Ted Williams, Calgary
My instinct is to write a sputtering, indignant response to someone who is clearly old enough to remember the attacks on Pearl Harbor and a time when 15-20% of your income was all it took to put a three bedroom, two bath roof over your head. But the kinds of things I'd say to this guy would never be approved for print in the Herald.
He says grow up. Does grow up mean, say, get an education? So that's $28,000 in tuition alone for both Mom and Dad to get a two year diploma.
He says get married. Well, first you have to find someone who is more interested in marriage than Xbox 360s and nightclubs - a bit of a challenge, these days. Then comes the wedding. Let's say it's a bare bones deal - 15 people in a church followed by dinner for those 15 people at Moxies. By the time you pay your officiant, your marriage license, get a half decent dress and suit, a few flowers, and a couple of rings, you're still looking at about $7,000. Our couple that just spent $28,000 on school may very well not have $7,000 to spend on a ceremony.
But, let's assume they do. Then they want kids, so they buy a home big enough to raise them in. Let's say our couple has low expectations and buys a two bedroom apartment condo, thinking that little Johnny and Janie can share the second bedroom and forgo a backyard and space to play. A quick look on Calgary's MLS website says that they'll be spending at least $230,000 on their little home. After scrimping for an $11,000 downpayment, they now face a mortgage payment of about $1575 per month. Add in condo fees, phone, cable, and property taxes, and our couple needs $2,000 a month just to keep themselves sheltered. Little Johnny and Janie come along, and the couple is faced with Dad having to pay everything out of his salary so that Mom can stay home with the kids, or else paying in the neighbourhood of $1600 a month to ship the kids off to daycare. (A colleague of mine is expecting his first child. He was shocked to find that due to ratio laws, daycares are now charging $950/month for each child under 13 months). But wait - there aren't any daycare spaces. So Mom HAS to quit her job.
Financial planners say that if your housing costs exceed 30% of your income, you're overstretched. So with Dad supporting the family, he needs to bring home a NET pay of just over $6,000 a month for the family to live comfortably. Which means that Dad needs to gross pretty close to $100,000 a year - and let's not forget that Dad has a two year diploma rather than a master's degree, because he simply couldn't afford to stay in school longer. And he needs this $100,000 a year income to finance his "lavish lifestyle" - living in a two bedroom apartment in Thorncliffe or Falconridge, and buying his kids some brand-spanking new clothes every now and then - from Wal-Mart.
And people wonder why today's twentysomethings refuse to "grow up." Ted Williams, lets go for tea, and bridge the generation gap.
I'm writing in reference to recent articles about the state of the family in Canadian society.
I firmly believe that the foundation of any healthy, vibrant culture is the family. By this I mean the traditional husband, wife and children type of family.
Men and women were meant to be together in a marriage. A marriage provides a stable environment for children.
Children need to see their parents working together to solve problems in a way that is full of love, respect and commitment to one another.
This will help children to form healthy relationships with friends, employers, others in society and eventually their own spouses.
When you mess with the traditional family you are messing with the foundation of society and putting it at risk of failure. You don't have to be too smart to know what will happen if people don't get married and have enough kids.
You can basically put your culture on the endangered species list.
Already on this list are the cultures of Japan, Italy, Germany and pretty much all of Europe, and throw Canada in there as well. So come people, grow up, get married and have some kids.
Ted Williams, Calgary
My instinct is to write a sputtering, indignant response to someone who is clearly old enough to remember the attacks on Pearl Harbor and a time when 15-20% of your income was all it took to put a three bedroom, two bath roof over your head. But the kinds of things I'd say to this guy would never be approved for print in the Herald.
He says grow up. Does grow up mean, say, get an education? So that's $28,000 in tuition alone for both Mom and Dad to get a two year diploma.
He says get married. Well, first you have to find someone who is more interested in marriage than Xbox 360s and nightclubs - a bit of a challenge, these days. Then comes the wedding. Let's say it's a bare bones deal - 15 people in a church followed by dinner for those 15 people at Moxies. By the time you pay your officiant, your marriage license, get a half decent dress and suit, a few flowers, and a couple of rings, you're still looking at about $7,000. Our couple that just spent $28,000 on school may very well not have $7,000 to spend on a ceremony.
But, let's assume they do. Then they want kids, so they buy a home big enough to raise them in. Let's say our couple has low expectations and buys a two bedroom apartment condo, thinking that little Johnny and Janie can share the second bedroom and forgo a backyard and space to play. A quick look on Calgary's MLS website says that they'll be spending at least $230,000 on their little home. After scrimping for an $11,000 downpayment, they now face a mortgage payment of about $1575 per month. Add in condo fees, phone, cable, and property taxes, and our couple needs $2,000 a month just to keep themselves sheltered. Little Johnny and Janie come along, and the couple is faced with Dad having to pay everything out of his salary so that Mom can stay home with the kids, or else paying in the neighbourhood of $1600 a month to ship the kids off to daycare. (A colleague of mine is expecting his first child. He was shocked to find that due to ratio laws, daycares are now charging $950/month for each child under 13 months). But wait - there aren't any daycare spaces. So Mom HAS to quit her job.
Financial planners say that if your housing costs exceed 30% of your income, you're overstretched. So with Dad supporting the family, he needs to bring home a NET pay of just over $6,000 a month for the family to live comfortably. Which means that Dad needs to gross pretty close to $100,000 a year - and let's not forget that Dad has a two year diploma rather than a master's degree, because he simply couldn't afford to stay in school longer. And he needs this $100,000 a year income to finance his "lavish lifestyle" - living in a two bedroom apartment in Thorncliffe or Falconridge, and buying his kids some brand-spanking new clothes every now and then - from Wal-Mart.
And people wonder why today's twentysomethings refuse to "grow up." Ted Williams, lets go for tea, and bridge the generation gap.