HEY. LISTEN.
I honestly can't think of anyone that I don't already talk to that would read this and care enough to gain any kind of insight as to what the hell's going on in my hood (NYUKKAH), but more than anything I'll do this for my own sanity. Because for the last 2 years of my life the only thing I have to show for all the effort I've tried to put into my life is perpetual disappointment, an increasingly foul sense of humor and disenchantment with just about everything that possesses an opinion and an asshole.
First off, I'm not going to apologize for whatever I may say or do from this point forward. I'm through apologizing. I'm sick of it. I care entirely too much, and get nothing for it. Honestly it feels like whenever I try to show the tiniest bit of concern I get bitten square in the ass. It's like being told to mind your own business and to help at the same time. It's come to the point now where the decisions I make in my own life range from "annoying" to one hour soap opera specials because it's guaranteed that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE is not going to like it. The only things I hear anymore are expectations. Comparisons. "You could be". "You should be". Strangely, no one wants to actually help. When it comes to mouths and assholes there's no end to the amount of concerned masses that would love to open one end or the other. When it comes down to actual participation however, shit gets empty like the rib plate at a family reunion.
Thanks, guys. Really. I mean for all the worthless things I do the least I could do is show my appreciation in return right? I'm a generous guy after all. It's in my nature.
Well that felt good. So, I can't quite remember where exactly I trailed off. Oh, I was going to DragonCon! It was surprisingly fun this year. I'm sure having a pack of friends who don't know how to act in public probably helps, but for the most part it was a progressively better year. Well alright, shit wasn't all roses and sunshine but honestly you can't make an omelet without cracking a few...uh...honesty issues? The con was more of a fun/not fun roller coaster. When my sister was told we were paying 40% more for our rooms because someone on their end can't take notes, that was about the start of the giggles. I did manage to make a few people come for the first time and let them make MY life miserable for a change (FUCK YOU SHANE I AM STILL AND FOREVER MAD AT THAT COUGAR BUT WELL PLAYED GOOD SIR). I also ran into a few people I never wanted to see again and managed to incur the wrath of someone's boyfriend with a fucking glance. I really want to figure out what it was I did and harness that power. I mean how awesome would it be to have the power to destroy entire lives with your EYEBALLS?
Boyfriend: So, what do you wanna do next?
Girlfriend: I wanna ride...
Joseph: *FUCKING EYEBALLS*
Girlfriend: ...him.
Yeah, I'm gonna be flexing my retinas for the next few months. I will say it was nice having a room this year that was not populated by complete strangers. Granted half of them managed to piss me off in ways I haven't had to explore since they took down the McRib, and I'm still quite bothered by a few of them but that's entirely too long ago to truly care about anymore. Lesson learned. Now don't let all this pisstivity put you off like I was angry the whole weekend, quite the opposite. I just can't help but to be mad as hell anymore because that's all I've got left to entertain myself with. I can't even sit down with my music anymore, I'm just too angry. Now you know that's mad as hell when I can't even formulate a simple rhythm. Just angry for no reason. Grr bitch, grr.
Because of (possibly in spite of) this, I've found my angry song. Now I have to sit and explain my disclaimer before I drop this on you. See, anger is very irrational like most emotions, but it's also a very violent emotion. When people get angry they lose focus and do shit for the sake of doing shit with no real concern for common sense or anyone else present. This is commonly referred to as "ignorant". Therefore, through needless violence, anger is more than often a very ignorant emotion. With that said, you're about to experience some ignorant ass shit up in this bitch. BITCH. ASS. NYUKKA.
That's it. I'm unhappy, I'm tired, I'm frustrated beyond all repair and I'm done. Go enjoy your respective boyfriends/girlfriends, study hard for those classes and kiss your tolerant parents goodnight.
First off, I'm not going to apologize for whatever I may say or do from this point forward. I'm through apologizing. I'm sick of it. I care entirely too much, and get nothing for it. Honestly it feels like whenever I try to show the tiniest bit of concern I get bitten square in the ass. It's like being told to mind your own business and to help at the same time. It's come to the point now where the decisions I make in my own life range from "annoying" to one hour soap opera specials because it's guaranteed that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE is not going to like it. The only things I hear anymore are expectations. Comparisons. "You could be". "You should be". Strangely, no one wants to actually help. When it comes to mouths and assholes there's no end to the amount of concerned masses that would love to open one end or the other. When it comes down to actual participation however, shit gets empty like the rib plate at a family reunion.
Thanks, guys. Really. I mean for all the worthless things I do the least I could do is show my appreciation in return right? I'm a generous guy after all. It's in my nature.
Well that felt good. So, I can't quite remember where exactly I trailed off. Oh, I was going to DragonCon! It was surprisingly fun this year. I'm sure having a pack of friends who don't know how to act in public probably helps, but for the most part it was a progressively better year. Well alright, shit wasn't all roses and sunshine but honestly you can't make an omelet without cracking a few...uh...honesty issues? The con was more of a fun/not fun roller coaster. When my sister was told we were paying 40% more for our rooms because someone on their end can't take notes, that was about the start of the giggles. I did manage to make a few people come for the first time and let them make MY life miserable for a change (FUCK YOU SHANE I AM STILL AND FOREVER MAD AT THAT COUGAR BUT WELL PLAYED GOOD SIR). I also ran into a few people I never wanted to see again and managed to incur the wrath of someone's boyfriend with a fucking glance. I really want to figure out what it was I did and harness that power. I mean how awesome would it be to have the power to destroy entire lives with your EYEBALLS?
Boyfriend: So, what do you wanna do next?
Girlfriend: I wanna ride...
Joseph: *FUCKING EYEBALLS*
Girlfriend: ...him.
Yeah, I'm gonna be flexing my retinas for the next few months. I will say it was nice having a room this year that was not populated by complete strangers. Granted half of them managed to piss me off in ways I haven't had to explore since they took down the McRib, and I'm still quite bothered by a few of them but that's entirely too long ago to truly care about anymore. Lesson learned. Now don't let all this pisstivity put you off like I was angry the whole weekend, quite the opposite. I just can't help but to be mad as hell anymore because that's all I've got left to entertain myself with. I can't even sit down with my music anymore, I'm just too angry. Now you know that's mad as hell when I can't even formulate a simple rhythm. Just angry for no reason. Grr bitch, grr.
Because of (possibly in spite of) this, I've found my angry song. Now I have to sit and explain my disclaimer before I drop this on you. See, anger is very irrational like most emotions, but it's also a very violent emotion. When people get angry they lose focus and do shit for the sake of doing shit with no real concern for common sense or anyone else present. This is commonly referred to as "ignorant". Therefore, through needless violence, anger is more than often a very ignorant emotion. With that said, you're about to experience some ignorant ass shit up in this bitch. BITCH. ASS. NYUKKA.
That's it. I'm unhappy, I'm tired, I'm frustrated beyond all repair and I'm done. Go enjoy your respective boyfriends/girlfriends, study hard for those classes and kiss your tolerant parents goodnight.