in which I see results
I am noticing changes in my body. I know that other people likely don't see them, but since I see my body more often than they do, I certainly have noticed.
I have this little pooch, or roll above my naval. It's only made an appearance in the last two years or so. I detest it. ABHOR it. It makes me look like I have squeezed into my pants, no matter what kind of pants or shorts I am wearing, because that roll makes it look like I have a constant muffin top. The pants I could have on could be loose enough to fall off my butt, and I'd still sport that muffin top look. No bueno.
I also have thighs that would gross out just about anyone, it's NOT cute...it's gross. My legs above the knee are nauseating. And we won't even go into my huge double chin and my abdominal pouch.
Yeah, do you get the idea that I'm not so thrilled with myself physically? Duh. But it seems at 30 I hit the wall. And now I am changing these things.
I have lost 40 pounds since Christmas. Tracking my calories, and for the last month or so, going to the gym.
I LOVE the gym. I would actually be there now instead of writing this if I didn't have to go help a friend move their bed into their new digs shortly.
I work out generally 3-4 days a week. And in just the month since I have started I have begun to see changes in my body. Inside and out.
That muffin top? Yeah, it is starting to disappear...slowly, but still. My sister noticed when we were over there on Saturday, but she also looks at my body with a critical eye (we both look at each other the same way we look at ourselves, as we often ask one another about stuff like that). So I don't think it's something just anyone will notice, but she did, and it was awesome.
My shirts...well, I have huge boobs. There is just no disguising that. It is what it is, and no matter what I do, when I lose weight, those never seem to disappear. *shrug* So I am still wearing a 3x shirt because they are just roomier, and comfy. However, my 2x shirts which I would always have to do the fat girl cheat with (using your elbows to stretch the t-shirt fabric out before you walk out in it so it is "looser") over my midsection, I am not having to do it.
It was shocking. And it took me a couple minutes to realize that I had actually skipped that step because the fabric was not clinging to me. (a fat girl's worst enemy is clingy fabrics!)
I have GREAT calves. Seriously, awesome. And despite being over 300 pounds (though now below that! YAY!) I have NEVER had cankles! I also never had swelling issues with my ankles; so those are good, too, and I recently lost a shoe size. Above the knee...that is a whole other story!
I have two pairs of shorts I bought at the beginning of summer, even bought them a little snug. These days (even right out of the dryer) they are a touch loose, and after wearing them once, I can take them on and off without unbuttoning them! *lol* But they are also shorter than any other pair of shorts I have or generally wear. Which makes me mildly uncomfortable. But I have been wearing them. They are too comfy not to.
But I have noticed my thighs changing...the upper part which is the worst is still horrible, but changing. The mid-lower thigh is getting better. I still have too much there, and I probably always will, but it's definately getting better. I know what I see is different than what other people see, but when I sit down in the shorts, I no longer am repulsed by what I see when I do, and tug as hard as possible on them to pull them down as far towards my knee as they'll go. I just see my thigh. *shrug*
And I haven't even talked about how I'm feeling! I have way more energy. I'm still lazy, and prefer to loaf about, but in general, I really do have more energy. I WANT to go to the gym, and I don't just dismiss it when I think about it, I actually get up and go get dressed to go. Same for general errands. I found myself today wanting to go somewhere and do something, and disappointed when I couldn't come up with a damned thing other than the gym, which I didn't want to do, because I had JUST taken a shower! *lol* And when I haven't been sick (which I was last week) I am in a better mood over-all as well. It's awesomeness.
I'm still on a HUGE learning curve food-wise, but I think I'll get there at some point. I really wish I had a "food is just for fuel" mentality, instead of loving it the way I do. But I'm learning to love it in a new way. A Moderated way. No longer love and hate, but cooperative. Some days are still love and hate, but most these days are cooperative learning about my body and the food I put into it.
Oh, and as a final side-note....why the hell does every healthy dish call for freaking bell peppers?!?!?! I HATE bell peppers! They are nasty! They even taint the taste of whatever dish they happen to be in as far as I (and my taste buds) are concerned! Isn't there something else that you can use that will give flavour to a dish WITHOUT the gratuitious use of BELL PEPPERS?!?!?! *gag* And the sad bit is, when you eliminate them, it seems the dish is bland. Granted, I can add other things such as garlic or whatever, but goodness! Why on earth should SO MANY dishes rely mainly on a freaking bell pepper for it to have any flavour?!?!?! ARGH!
Ok, now to go help said friend move their junk.
I have this little pooch, or roll above my naval. It's only made an appearance in the last two years or so. I detest it. ABHOR it. It makes me look like I have squeezed into my pants, no matter what kind of pants or shorts I am wearing, because that roll makes it look like I have a constant muffin top. The pants I could have on could be loose enough to fall off my butt, and I'd still sport that muffin top look. No bueno.
I also have thighs that would gross out just about anyone, it's NOT cute...it's gross. My legs above the knee are nauseating. And we won't even go into my huge double chin and my abdominal pouch.
Yeah, do you get the idea that I'm not so thrilled with myself physically? Duh. But it seems at 30 I hit the wall. And now I am changing these things.
I have lost 40 pounds since Christmas. Tracking my calories, and for the last month or so, going to the gym.
I LOVE the gym. I would actually be there now instead of writing this if I didn't have to go help a friend move their bed into their new digs shortly.
I work out generally 3-4 days a week. And in just the month since I have started I have begun to see changes in my body. Inside and out.
That muffin top? Yeah, it is starting to disappear...slowly, but still. My sister noticed when we were over there on Saturday, but she also looks at my body with a critical eye (we both look at each other the same way we look at ourselves, as we often ask one another about stuff like that). So I don't think it's something just anyone will notice, but she did, and it was awesome.
My shirts...well, I have huge boobs. There is just no disguising that. It is what it is, and no matter what I do, when I lose weight, those never seem to disappear. *shrug* So I am still wearing a 3x shirt because they are just roomier, and comfy. However, my 2x shirts which I would always have to do the fat girl cheat with (using your elbows to stretch the t-shirt fabric out before you walk out in it so it is "looser") over my midsection, I am not having to do it.
It was shocking. And it took me a couple minutes to realize that I had actually skipped that step because the fabric was not clinging to me. (a fat girl's worst enemy is clingy fabrics!)
I have GREAT calves. Seriously, awesome. And despite being over 300 pounds (though now below that! YAY!) I have NEVER had cankles! I also never had swelling issues with my ankles; so those are good, too, and I recently lost a shoe size. Above the knee...that is a whole other story!
I have two pairs of shorts I bought at the beginning of summer, even bought them a little snug. These days (even right out of the dryer) they are a touch loose, and after wearing them once, I can take them on and off without unbuttoning them! *lol* But they are also shorter than any other pair of shorts I have or generally wear. Which makes me mildly uncomfortable. But I have been wearing them. They are too comfy not to.
But I have noticed my thighs changing...the upper part which is the worst is still horrible, but changing. The mid-lower thigh is getting better. I still have too much there, and I probably always will, but it's definately getting better. I know what I see is different than what other people see, but when I sit down in the shorts, I no longer am repulsed by what I see when I do, and tug as hard as possible on them to pull them down as far towards my knee as they'll go. I just see my thigh. *shrug*
And I haven't even talked about how I'm feeling! I have way more energy. I'm still lazy, and prefer to loaf about, but in general, I really do have more energy. I WANT to go to the gym, and I don't just dismiss it when I think about it, I actually get up and go get dressed to go. Same for general errands. I found myself today wanting to go somewhere and do something, and disappointed when I couldn't come up with a damned thing other than the gym, which I didn't want to do, because I had JUST taken a shower! *lol* And when I haven't been sick (which I was last week) I am in a better mood over-all as well. It's awesomeness.
I'm still on a HUGE learning curve food-wise, but I think I'll get there at some point. I really wish I had a "food is just for fuel" mentality, instead of loving it the way I do. But I'm learning to love it in a new way. A Moderated way. No longer love and hate, but cooperative. Some days are still love and hate, but most these days are cooperative learning about my body and the food I put into it.
Oh, and as a final side-note....why the hell does every healthy dish call for freaking bell peppers?!?!?! I HATE bell peppers! They are nasty! They even taint the taste of whatever dish they happen to be in as far as I (and my taste buds) are concerned! Isn't there something else that you can use that will give flavour to a dish WITHOUT the gratuitious use of BELL PEPPERS?!?!?! *gag* And the sad bit is, when you eliminate them, it seems the dish is bland. Granted, I can add other things such as garlic or whatever, but goodness! Why on earth should SO MANY dishes rely mainly on a freaking bell pepper for it to have any flavour?!?!?! ARGH!
Ok, now to go help said friend move their junk.