http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QBrlYtV60GA The song above is one of my favorites from Michael Buble, one of my favorite contemporary artists. I think he is amazing. Anyways, bit of an explanation: I listen to a lot of different types of music but a song I can relate to or that makes me think is always better than one that doesn't. I like things that speak to me: books, songs, photos, whatever. Anything that reminds me of who I am or what I want or makes me want to be better, more creative, more introspective, more balanced, more genuine really tends to strike me.
This might be a bit egocentric but any song that I can apply to my own life to understand sticks with me. I think about other people. I worry about other people. But sometimes I just want a song that reminds me of how I feel about everyday life. This song is one of them. It is about Hollywood and, in my opinion, all the different choices and avenues a musician/actor can take but Michael Buble obviously thinks there is a more pure road. I feel the same way about writing. I may not be a great writer or even a good writer. I can try to improve but I can't inject myself with divine talent. Doesn't work that way. What I can do is try, keep writing, and try to remember what is important about the actual writing. Because the truth is, the writing is more important than any dreams of money or fame I may or may not want. I write rather than try to be an Olympic Ice Skater or NBA star or something because it's about what I get from the act of writing, exploring myself and the world around me. This song resonates with me because I think it has a similar attitude.
This is what I hear when I hear this song:
Could you be a teenage idol? Could you be a movie star? When l turn on my TV will you smile and wave at me, telling Oprah who you are?
For me, this part is about getting over the idea that you have an audience. Sometimes it is necessary, such as when you are writing a research paper and you need to be clear about how much general information to provide and how informed the reader is on the topic; however, with creative writing, I do not think that is important. Not at first at least. Maybe during revision it is important to go back and include information to make sure the reader sticks with and can keep up with the writing but you don't want the reader's expectations horning in and skewing the original creation. Some things have to be just pure creativity where you as a writer, in my opinion, get as close as you can to whatever you are exploring and put on blinders to everything behind you. Otherwise, you're distracted and might miss out on some important detail. It's not about trying to be admired by others. That is nice but your dreams as a writer or singer shouldn't be to be an idol; it should be to create something that is more important to talk about and more interesting than yourseIlf or who you are. It's not about you. It's about the work you bring.
You have a million choices in life and you don't get to control who you become but you can make choices that effect it. You could be this or you could be that. It's all about what you really want and I don't think being an idol or a star would be satisfying.
I don't want to take you dancing when you're dancing with the world. You can flash your caviar and your million dollar car. I don't need that kind of girl.
I am a very conflicted person with conflicting desires. And I think that sometimes I think, I want a job that will pay. I want structure. I want security. But I want to be a professor and a writer. Those aren't exactly careers that boast luxurious prospects. Sometimes when I am thinking more about the needs of money and security when I'm trying to write, I just come up with junk, cliche, shallow, fake, congealed, mess. That's because I'm not being genuine because my feelings and desires aren't. My muse instantly recognizes it and takes off. It says, "I don't need this. This isn't what I'm for." You can't pimp your muse for security or payoff. Inspiration, when and if it does happen, has to be pure. It won't dance with you for payment. If it gets you in a beneficial position, great. But that is not its true object. I believe a good writer writes because that is how he/she makes sense of the world and because really it's an emotional and mental necessity. I write because I have to, because I'm compelled and if I ignore that urging I think I am missing out. But I am human and sometimes I have to remind myself when I'm having those dreams about being on the Today Show or whichever talkshow there is talking about my new book. It's about the writing and the story, not everything else.
So don't go higher for desire. Put it in your head. Baby, Hollywood is dead. You can find it in yourself.
The whole Hollywood thing to me is just that concept of being seen and admired for whatever you're doing. People take that admiration too much into consideration. You as a writer have to get rid of the idea of the audience and the readers and the book covers and all the other impure stuff and write, even if it means being a recluse. The perspective needed for writing comes from inside, not from what you think will get you an entire book shelf at Barnes & Noble (one of my favorite places in the world by the way).
Keep on loving what is true and the world will come to you. You can find it in yourself.