meandering through the mush between my ears
it has been so long since i've written, i really don't know where to start....
i think i have finally accepted that sometimes we must accept the word of authorities, and put off the answer to "why?" until later. at certain levels of ignorace, we may be able to ask "why?" --or any number of puzzling, seemingly unanswerable questions--yet we cannot find the answer within ourselves, so we suppose that there may be no answer. i have FINALLY accepted that sometimse we must accept the answer that a trusted authority gives. this may seem rather elementary, but i always wanted to try and figure out the reason for things on my own, not be told the answer to them.
*and, believe it or not, i came to this realization through math class... yes kids, math class*
so, drifting through this world, this time, with so many stimulants, choices, desires, possiblilities... what is one to do?? who can you trust?? this is milidly difficult for me because i've always sort of believed that different people believe different things, and no one thing is exactly right or better than the other. its all a matter of perspective and whats right for you... but how do you know what is right for you?
grrr.. this is actually a stupid question, but i wont erase it just in case someone may wander here and read that and actually be interested....
tool inspired me to do yoga this morning, believe that? crazy, isn't it? dont ask how.
so, i've been at the krsna temple quite a lot this last month or so. just about everyday. reflecting on this, i'm mildly suprised by that fact. i'm actually turning into a devotee of a particular God. this is actually where the whole conversation about trusting authorities came from. a lot of things Krsna teaches it would be impossible for me to know just be reflecting on this one life. but when i read it or hear it, i tend to believe it immediately. for some reason, i just automatically accept it, and it has taken me this long *a month or so* to really ask why. but i figured that i can't possibly understand why right now. i'm too young and ignorant to know why. but so far, what krsna teaches blends perfectly with the ideas i already had about this world, and about life.
plus, krsna is beautiful. http://www.spiritualstudios.com/polyresin/big/bg1.jpg who couldn't love a God that adoreable, who steals butter and does other mischief when he's young, and messes around with the beautiful gopis (cowherd girls..) when he's older??
;)
i must stop here, kids. its way too exhausting to try to write all that is going through my head right now.
i'm thinking at least 5x faster than i can type.
i think i have finally accepted that sometimes we must accept the word of authorities, and put off the answer to "why?" until later. at certain levels of ignorace, we may be able to ask "why?" --or any number of puzzling, seemingly unanswerable questions--yet we cannot find the answer within ourselves, so we suppose that there may be no answer. i have FINALLY accepted that sometimse we must accept the answer that a trusted authority gives. this may seem rather elementary, but i always wanted to try and figure out the reason for things on my own, not be told the answer to them.
*and, believe it or not, i came to this realization through math class... yes kids, math class*
so, drifting through this world, this time, with so many stimulants, choices, desires, possiblilities... what is one to do?? who can you trust?? this is milidly difficult for me because i've always sort of believed that different people believe different things, and no one thing is exactly right or better than the other. its all a matter of perspective and whats right for you... but how do you know what is right for you?
grrr.. this is actually a stupid question, but i wont erase it just in case someone may wander here and read that and actually be interested....
tool inspired me to do yoga this morning, believe that? crazy, isn't it? dont ask how.
so, i've been at the krsna temple quite a lot this last month or so. just about everyday. reflecting on this, i'm mildly suprised by that fact. i'm actually turning into a devotee of a particular God. this is actually where the whole conversation about trusting authorities came from. a lot of things Krsna teaches it would be impossible for me to know just be reflecting on this one life. but when i read it or hear it, i tend to believe it immediately. for some reason, i just automatically accept it, and it has taken me this long *a month or so* to really ask why. but i figured that i can't possibly understand why right now. i'm too young and ignorant to know why. but so far, what krsna teaches blends perfectly with the ideas i already had about this world, and about life.
plus, krsna is beautiful. http://www.spiritualstudios.com/polyresin/big/bg1.jpg who couldn't love a God that adoreable, who steals butter and does other mischief when he's young, and messes around with the beautiful gopis (cowherd girls..) when he's older??
;)
i must stop here, kids. its way too exhausting to try to write all that is going through my head right now.
i'm thinking at least 5x faster than i can type.