(no subject)
The only downside to having a roommate is that I can't go to sleep when people are in here watching a movie. Some friends are watching "Silent Hill," which I've never seen, but it seems terrible.
Halloween has entirely lost its appeal since that one good night in eighth grade when we raided the school and did our best to take out our anger with toilet paper, eggs, and shaving cream. Apparently, New York kids are a lot more sadistic on Halloween than California kids are. I don't know why.
This afternoon I talked to my mom on the phone and set out a proposal about living here for the summer. It's a big decision and it's still too early to decide, but I think saying it now will help the cause later on. Plus it gives me time to convince myself that maybe New York City isn't as essential to my well-being as I thought. Still, but the time May rolls around, I might miss New York terribly and want nothing to do with this town. By and large, though, that's unlikely.
Here's the thing about spending my summer here:
If I'm accepted to be a "summer guest host," I'd be making money for doing what I normally do: sitting at a desk for extended periods of time, and enjoying solitude. The city would wait outside for me and we could make love when we please.
The bridge between good and evil lies in the fact that I'd be tearing myself away from my former life. I would miss the 2007 CHHS Graduation, which could be a tragic loss or mere dust on the curb. I wouldn't be with my friends during their last summer before college. But honestly, what does that all mean? The summer before college is supposed to be epic, but what was it? I enjoyed my summer because I spent eight weeks romanticizing about fleeing. Enjoying those eight weeks wasn't the product of a grilled cheese deluxe with some good conversation alongside the Hudson River, because I had that throughout my teen years. The summer was nice but it wasn't special. This is when I could go on about how listening to The Fray reminds me of an amazingly blurry but so happy period of my life. The past is glitzy so there's no valid reason why the future can't be just as great, especially in a city like this.
It's just really important to point out that tearing myself away from Croton doesn't mean I want to tear myself away from my best friends. I feel like I just need to do something like this; it's nice, though, that this is all so unexpected and two years ago I wasn't considering a move to California at all.
Halloween has entirely lost its appeal since that one good night in eighth grade when we raided the school and did our best to take out our anger with toilet paper, eggs, and shaving cream. Apparently, New York kids are a lot more sadistic on Halloween than California kids are. I don't know why.
This afternoon I talked to my mom on the phone and set out a proposal about living here for the summer. It's a big decision and it's still too early to decide, but I think saying it now will help the cause later on. Plus it gives me time to convince myself that maybe New York City isn't as essential to my well-being as I thought. Still, but the time May rolls around, I might miss New York terribly and want nothing to do with this town. By and large, though, that's unlikely.
Here's the thing about spending my summer here:
If I'm accepted to be a "summer guest host," I'd be making money for doing what I normally do: sitting at a desk for extended periods of time, and enjoying solitude. The city would wait outside for me and we could make love when we please.
The bridge between good and evil lies in the fact that I'd be tearing myself away from my former life. I would miss the 2007 CHHS Graduation, which could be a tragic loss or mere dust on the curb. I wouldn't be with my friends during their last summer before college. But honestly, what does that all mean? The summer before college is supposed to be epic, but what was it? I enjoyed my summer because I spent eight weeks romanticizing about fleeing. Enjoying those eight weeks wasn't the product of a grilled cheese deluxe with some good conversation alongside the Hudson River, because I had that throughout my teen years. The summer was nice but it wasn't special. This is when I could go on about how listening to The Fray reminds me of an amazingly blurry but so happy period of my life. The past is glitzy so there's no valid reason why the future can't be just as great, especially in a city like this.
It's just really important to point out that tearing myself away from Croton doesn't mean I want to tear myself away from my best friends. I feel like I just need to do something like this; it's nice, though, that this is all so unexpected and two years ago I wasn't considering a move to California at all.