~Victorian: The Life and Death of Jeriah Uzuki~
Far too human to let go
I fight the river and the flow
I fight the love and the fear
I do not want to leave you here
Being a Viscount had never been what Jeriah Uzuki had wanted, however he had been an only child and so that was surely expected of him that he would learn to deal with people, with the land.. all sorts of things. Much like those before and those who would come after, Jeriah had dreams that the title would invariably get in the way with, he had wanted to be someone who worked with either plants or animals, he had never been used to or particularly good at dealing with people. He didn't even get along with his parents, for they thought that he was odd and while they didn't say as much, he could sense it and it caused him to keep his distance.
There was only one true companion in his life, the boy from the neighboring estate who would stay out in the days with him, hunting bird's eggs, searching for rare flowers. The heir to the Fatima line, and somehow Jeriah knew that Jakob was considered a bit odd too. It just meant that they were wholly on their own. It was the type of relationship where their was quiet and mutual understanding between them, that they were allies, though Jeriah was shy about that proclaimation, still if anyone wanted to talk to Jeriah, it was certain that they would need to go through Jakob, since Jeriah oftentimes hid behind Jakob like a wall.
The seasons of their youth were precious, there was nothing that would keep them back from enjoying that which life gave them. Even though the world of grown-ups would sneak up on them perhaps sooner then they would be used to, for Jeriah's parents died fairly early, leaving Jeriah in the hands of an Uncle who had control of Jeriah's inheritance. Almost immediately after that Jeriah was moved to London and away from his childhood playmate, still being a boy though by that time he had been on the threshhold of becoming a man. There was perhaps nothing that had anguished Jeriah more then to be moved away from the young boy that had been his anchor, and he hadn't been sure he could do things alone. Many tears had been shed into his pillows along with the silent knowledge that he felt more for Jakob then what could be deemed proper, surely a heart that ached that badly meant something, Jeriah wasn't blind into recognizing that.
But the years passed, five long and cheerless years in Jeriah's life in which he was forced into social situations that he did not want to be in, forced to be introduced around London and make his bows, even though wherever he went, he was still considered odd, for his shy and retiring ways as well as for his tendancy to slip off at the very moment when it was deemed socially acceptable. But he was rich and there would be young marriageable women that swarmed him, leading him to think that he was going to drown. That was when Jakob's advent into the social season came like a life saver, and so they became somewhat allies in finding wives. Jeriah though still held onto that secret love in his heart for the Lord Fatima and perhaps it came through in it's own ways, with the ways that when he was next to Jakob, noone else existed for him.
Then came the advent of Shiori into Jeriah's life. An advent that rocked him like a storm, and in the scheme of things it would be the single worst mistake that Jeriah would ever make, for she was of the type that she sniffled around Jakob while paying her attentions to Jeriah, as if she was trying to marry one and the score the other for a dalliance, however there were many sides that surrounded Jeriah and pretty much forced the pressing of his suit to her. He didn't like her, could feel her mocking him with her eyes but he offered for her, hoping that he could go back to his estate and forget about the glittering season which he so disliked, the only highlight having been when Jakob had entered to make it a bit more bearable.
And so Jeriah was married in all pomp and ceremony and he immediately took her back to his estate, hoping that Jakob would follow soon.. though he knew that Jakob still needed to find a wife, he could get through a few months to a year without Jakob's company, he had done it for five years.. but while he was in country, he wished for Jakob to come home sooner and sooner, because he missed the other with a lingering pain in his heart that made the seperation neigh unendurable.
And with the advent of Autumn, he recieved that call from Lord Fatima, the two of them now Lords of their very own estates. He rushed to Jakob's side and tried not to leave it overmuch save to eat and sleep, since the Uzuki and Fatima estates bordered each other, they shared alot of tenants, so Jeriah would go out accompanied by Jakob and they would visit them, with Jakob doing the talking, and Jeriah standing aside and trying to figure out what they could do to make improvements for each tenants, be it repairing a roof or working a little while in the gardens to winterize it. Together they were a team.
One evening came that which changed everything, with Shiori coming and telling him that she was pregnant, but that the child wasn't his. But that it was the child of his best friend. It was almost as if she wanted to instill discord in the both of them, figuring that to put a rip in the trust would make it easier to lure Jakob to her bed, but she miscalculated on several levels.
Jeriah wasn't one who could believe that of Jakob, he knew that if it were to happen, then Jakob wouldn't lie. There was that glittering of trust, that if something like that truly had happened, Jakob would tell him if he asked, so he rode his way to the Fatima estate, seeking to ask Jakob for the truth. Jeriah didn't want to think about if it was the truth, knowing that if it was.. there would be a part of him that would surely be destroyed. His friend recieved him in the impromptu visit with wine and some snacks but Jeriah wasn't hungry and he stood at the door of the library, his back against it while he uttered that question in his uncertain and quavering voice. "Is.. the child that Shiori is carrying.. is.. it.. yours?" and then his eyes falling shut while he waited for those words to come in Jakob's familar voice.. either yes, or no.
Instead he felt arms pull him into an embrace and Jakob's whispered voice against his ear. "It is a strong word, but I loathe your Viscountess... and if I were to bed anyone other then my wife, it certainly would not be her." and at those words, Jeriah relaxed and let out a sigh of relief, closing his eyes and just holding Jakob close and then the next words took him completely by surprise. "But there is no room in my heart to be in love with anyone but you." and that was the start of the unfolding, the sweet confession that caused Jeriah to become a blabbering idiot and spill out his entire feelings for Jakob, perhaps they were a bit messy and not very coherent, but at least they were said.
With that, Jeriah went back knowing that Jakob's constancy was true, and their relationship developed from their, growing deeper with every meeting between them, through that winter helping Shiori with the child that she declared was Jakob's. Jeriah let throw the blame and he let her, and perhaps even allowed her to think that him and Jakob weren't speaking so much anymore. Even though he went over on a nightly basis to spend time with Jakob and his wife, who's company he far preferred. The winter turned to spring and then the spring to summer before Jeriah's heir, Mat was born. When Shiori saw that child was indeed Jeriah's, she refused to care for the little one, leaving Jeriah stricken as he went to Jakob to ask him what he should do, but he didn't need to do anything.. for Lirin took one look at the crying little Mathias and then she relieved him of Jeriah's hands, she was due to have a child at any time and could nurse Mathias with ease. It was also extremely true that Jeriah stayed the next few weeks at the Fatima house, never leaving except for changes of clothing. In a way Mat was bonding with the only family that really mattered. It would colour how he viewed his own mother, and how he considered Lirin his own.
Jeriah let Mat run rampant with Jakob's son, Roni.. never allowing anything get in the way of their friendship and knowing that they would have the same bond that their father's had, for Jeriah knew that there was no one he loved more, each touch, each gaze however hidden it was, each stolen moment in their little love nest that was just theirs, a cottage that Jakob had built for them at the property line that divided the two estates, a symbol that in this space.. it wasn't his or Jeriah's.. but rather theirs.
Through the years, Shiori continued to persue Jakob in between her jaunts to London in which to aquire her own legion of mindless slaves, and to do shocking things that would throw tarnish on the Uzuki name. Though none of them really mattered to Jeriah for he had everything he needed and it didn't matter, he was content with his life and what he had given with, this Shiori saw and it drove her mad to see what precious thing her husband hand that kept him oblivious to every insensitive thing that she tried to do to inspire ire in him. And so one night shortly before Roni left for India, she followed her husband out on one of his evenings out to see where he would go, for he often did that, just up and leaving without telling anyone. What she discovered served to completely unhinge her, for underneath the tree just outside the cottage she spied Jakob waiting for Jeriah to dismount from his horse, and then after the horse had been let loose to graze, she saw her husband approach Jakob, there was a shift and they were in each other's arms, exchanging a lip lock that couldn't be mistaken as platonic in the slightest.
That evening was marked as the evening that Jeriah's death was certain, at least in Shiori's eyes.
It was a stormy night two years later, the wind howling and crashing on the lake that rested opposite of the two estates, a large lake where most boating occured, an occupation that Jakob and Jeriah had adopted very recently. The waves were chaotic and unpredictable, and the storm lasted all of a night, that night was the night that Jeriah disappeared, with Shiori alerting those around the area to keep on a lookout for the Viscount, making sure that the word reached the Fatima estate that Jeriah was missing.
Search parties were sent out however the visibility was dim, nothing could be seen within a few feet and the search parties were bade to go back and search when the storm had cleared, the lake had been searched, at least the perimeter since it was discovered that Jakob's boat had turned up missing as well.
The morning came, the clearing of the storm following it.. and it was then that Jeriah's body washed up on the shore of the lake, a pale imitation of what it had been in life, unbreathing and ultimately with the soul having left the body. He was pronounced dead and word was given to the searchers, of which one of their numbers was Lord Fatima. Then came the autopsy which in those days wasn't thorough, there was no indication of foul play... merely drowning, and then came the formalization of the title being passed on to Mathias. All of which happened in too quick of a time for it to truly be absorbed. Little traces of Jeriah clung to the folds of life, his presence felt along the lake, as if he was waiting for something or maybe even someone, the spiritual energy that radiated from the lake those few weeks after his death were great.. as if he was refusing to pass on completely. But regardless that lake would always hold the insignia of his life-presence, even after his death.
If I could speak in tongues of flame
I'd burn forever with your name
And take it with me through all time
I would remember who you are
In every life I'd touch your heart
In every dream
I fight the river and the flow
I fight the love and the fear
I do not want to leave you here
Being a Viscount had never been what Jeriah Uzuki had wanted, however he had been an only child and so that was surely expected of him that he would learn to deal with people, with the land.. all sorts of things. Much like those before and those who would come after, Jeriah had dreams that the title would invariably get in the way with, he had wanted to be someone who worked with either plants or animals, he had never been used to or particularly good at dealing with people. He didn't even get along with his parents, for they thought that he was odd and while they didn't say as much, he could sense it and it caused him to keep his distance.
There was only one true companion in his life, the boy from the neighboring estate who would stay out in the days with him, hunting bird's eggs, searching for rare flowers. The heir to the Fatima line, and somehow Jeriah knew that Jakob was considered a bit odd too. It just meant that they were wholly on their own. It was the type of relationship where their was quiet and mutual understanding between them, that they were allies, though Jeriah was shy about that proclaimation, still if anyone wanted to talk to Jeriah, it was certain that they would need to go through Jakob, since Jeriah oftentimes hid behind Jakob like a wall.
The seasons of their youth were precious, there was nothing that would keep them back from enjoying that which life gave them. Even though the world of grown-ups would sneak up on them perhaps sooner then they would be used to, for Jeriah's parents died fairly early, leaving Jeriah in the hands of an Uncle who had control of Jeriah's inheritance. Almost immediately after that Jeriah was moved to London and away from his childhood playmate, still being a boy though by that time he had been on the threshhold of becoming a man. There was perhaps nothing that had anguished Jeriah more then to be moved away from the young boy that had been his anchor, and he hadn't been sure he could do things alone. Many tears had been shed into his pillows along with the silent knowledge that he felt more for Jakob then what could be deemed proper, surely a heart that ached that badly meant something, Jeriah wasn't blind into recognizing that.
But the years passed, five long and cheerless years in Jeriah's life in which he was forced into social situations that he did not want to be in, forced to be introduced around London and make his bows, even though wherever he went, he was still considered odd, for his shy and retiring ways as well as for his tendancy to slip off at the very moment when it was deemed socially acceptable. But he was rich and there would be young marriageable women that swarmed him, leading him to think that he was going to drown. That was when Jakob's advent into the social season came like a life saver, and so they became somewhat allies in finding wives. Jeriah though still held onto that secret love in his heart for the Lord Fatima and perhaps it came through in it's own ways, with the ways that when he was next to Jakob, noone else existed for him.
Then came the advent of Shiori into Jeriah's life. An advent that rocked him like a storm, and in the scheme of things it would be the single worst mistake that Jeriah would ever make, for she was of the type that she sniffled around Jakob while paying her attentions to Jeriah, as if she was trying to marry one and the score the other for a dalliance, however there were many sides that surrounded Jeriah and pretty much forced the pressing of his suit to her. He didn't like her, could feel her mocking him with her eyes but he offered for her, hoping that he could go back to his estate and forget about the glittering season which he so disliked, the only highlight having been when Jakob had entered to make it a bit more bearable.
And so Jeriah was married in all pomp and ceremony and he immediately took her back to his estate, hoping that Jakob would follow soon.. though he knew that Jakob still needed to find a wife, he could get through a few months to a year without Jakob's company, he had done it for five years.. but while he was in country, he wished for Jakob to come home sooner and sooner, because he missed the other with a lingering pain in his heart that made the seperation neigh unendurable.
And with the advent of Autumn, he recieved that call from Lord Fatima, the two of them now Lords of their very own estates. He rushed to Jakob's side and tried not to leave it overmuch save to eat and sleep, since the Uzuki and Fatima estates bordered each other, they shared alot of tenants, so Jeriah would go out accompanied by Jakob and they would visit them, with Jakob doing the talking, and Jeriah standing aside and trying to figure out what they could do to make improvements for each tenants, be it repairing a roof or working a little while in the gardens to winterize it. Together they were a team.
One evening came that which changed everything, with Shiori coming and telling him that she was pregnant, but that the child wasn't his. But that it was the child of his best friend. It was almost as if she wanted to instill discord in the both of them, figuring that to put a rip in the trust would make it easier to lure Jakob to her bed, but she miscalculated on several levels.
Jeriah wasn't one who could believe that of Jakob, he knew that if it were to happen, then Jakob wouldn't lie. There was that glittering of trust, that if something like that truly had happened, Jakob would tell him if he asked, so he rode his way to the Fatima estate, seeking to ask Jakob for the truth. Jeriah didn't want to think about if it was the truth, knowing that if it was.. there would be a part of him that would surely be destroyed. His friend recieved him in the impromptu visit with wine and some snacks but Jeriah wasn't hungry and he stood at the door of the library, his back against it while he uttered that question in his uncertain and quavering voice. "Is.. the child that Shiori is carrying.. is.. it.. yours?" and then his eyes falling shut while he waited for those words to come in Jakob's familar voice.. either yes, or no.
Instead he felt arms pull him into an embrace and Jakob's whispered voice against his ear. "It is a strong word, but I loathe your Viscountess... and if I were to bed anyone other then my wife, it certainly would not be her." and at those words, Jeriah relaxed and let out a sigh of relief, closing his eyes and just holding Jakob close and then the next words took him completely by surprise. "But there is no room in my heart to be in love with anyone but you." and that was the start of the unfolding, the sweet confession that caused Jeriah to become a blabbering idiot and spill out his entire feelings for Jakob, perhaps they were a bit messy and not very coherent, but at least they were said.
With that, Jeriah went back knowing that Jakob's constancy was true, and their relationship developed from their, growing deeper with every meeting between them, through that winter helping Shiori with the child that she declared was Jakob's. Jeriah let throw the blame and he let her, and perhaps even allowed her to think that him and Jakob weren't speaking so much anymore. Even though he went over on a nightly basis to spend time with Jakob and his wife, who's company he far preferred. The winter turned to spring and then the spring to summer before Jeriah's heir, Mat was born. When Shiori saw that child was indeed Jeriah's, she refused to care for the little one, leaving Jeriah stricken as he went to Jakob to ask him what he should do, but he didn't need to do anything.. for Lirin took one look at the crying little Mathias and then she relieved him of Jeriah's hands, she was due to have a child at any time and could nurse Mathias with ease. It was also extremely true that Jeriah stayed the next few weeks at the Fatima house, never leaving except for changes of clothing. In a way Mat was bonding with the only family that really mattered. It would colour how he viewed his own mother, and how he considered Lirin his own.
Jeriah let Mat run rampant with Jakob's son, Roni.. never allowing anything get in the way of their friendship and knowing that they would have the same bond that their father's had, for Jeriah knew that there was no one he loved more, each touch, each gaze however hidden it was, each stolen moment in their little love nest that was just theirs, a cottage that Jakob had built for them at the property line that divided the two estates, a symbol that in this space.. it wasn't his or Jeriah's.. but rather theirs.
Through the years, Shiori continued to persue Jakob in between her jaunts to London in which to aquire her own legion of mindless slaves, and to do shocking things that would throw tarnish on the Uzuki name. Though none of them really mattered to Jeriah for he had everything he needed and it didn't matter, he was content with his life and what he had given with, this Shiori saw and it drove her mad to see what precious thing her husband hand that kept him oblivious to every insensitive thing that she tried to do to inspire ire in him. And so one night shortly before Roni left for India, she followed her husband out on one of his evenings out to see where he would go, for he often did that, just up and leaving without telling anyone. What she discovered served to completely unhinge her, for underneath the tree just outside the cottage she spied Jakob waiting for Jeriah to dismount from his horse, and then after the horse had been let loose to graze, she saw her husband approach Jakob, there was a shift and they were in each other's arms, exchanging a lip lock that couldn't be mistaken as platonic in the slightest.
That evening was marked as the evening that Jeriah's death was certain, at least in Shiori's eyes.
It was a stormy night two years later, the wind howling and crashing on the lake that rested opposite of the two estates, a large lake where most boating occured, an occupation that Jakob and Jeriah had adopted very recently. The waves were chaotic and unpredictable, and the storm lasted all of a night, that night was the night that Jeriah disappeared, with Shiori alerting those around the area to keep on a lookout for the Viscount, making sure that the word reached the Fatima estate that Jeriah was missing.
Search parties were sent out however the visibility was dim, nothing could be seen within a few feet and the search parties were bade to go back and search when the storm had cleared, the lake had been searched, at least the perimeter since it was discovered that Jakob's boat had turned up missing as well.
The morning came, the clearing of the storm following it.. and it was then that Jeriah's body washed up on the shore of the lake, a pale imitation of what it had been in life, unbreathing and ultimately with the soul having left the body. He was pronounced dead and word was given to the searchers, of which one of their numbers was Lord Fatima. Then came the autopsy which in those days wasn't thorough, there was no indication of foul play... merely drowning, and then came the formalization of the title being passed on to Mathias. All of which happened in too quick of a time for it to truly be absorbed. Little traces of Jeriah clung to the folds of life, his presence felt along the lake, as if he was waiting for something or maybe even someone, the spiritual energy that radiated from the lake those few weeks after his death were great.. as if he was refusing to pass on completely. But regardless that lake would always hold the insignia of his life-presence, even after his death.
If I could speak in tongues of flame
I'd burn forever with your name
And take it with me through all time
I would remember who you are
In every life I'd touch your heart
In every dream