(no subject)
and all i can think about today is a pitcher of beer at miya's, platters of weird sushi, ordering the weirdest shit we could find in the vegetarian half and explaining it to one another in the middle of it. the owner came out & thanked us for coming. he doesn't know
my first ride on a motorcycle, late at night & a little drunk, m giving me his helmet, pressing it down around my head, wrapping my arms around him, pressing my thighs into his, & laughing breathless in his ear when we hit 45 on new haven backroads
i don't know how to do this
i don't know where to put this
m in his room saturday morning, when it was pouring rain, swallowing 10 pills and putting on the headphones
i remember when he moved into the room on the third floor, i ran around the apartment and admired the skylight and weird ceiling angles and little inconsistencies, the semi-chimney in his room, but he said he didn't like it. he said he was moving back downstairs. i said why? & he said, i don't know. it doesn't feel like home. that's the room he was in when he died.
i have to drive by that room, that house, every day, on the way to school.
i probably wasn't even in his head when he died
how does anyone do this
my first ride on a motorcycle, late at night & a little drunk, m giving me his helmet, pressing it down around my head, wrapping my arms around him, pressing my thighs into his, & laughing breathless in his ear when we hit 45 on new haven backroads
i don't know how to do this
i don't know where to put this
m in his room saturday morning, when it was pouring rain, swallowing 10 pills and putting on the headphones
i remember when he moved into the room on the third floor, i ran around the apartment and admired the skylight and weird ceiling angles and little inconsistencies, the semi-chimney in his room, but he said he didn't like it. he said he was moving back downstairs. i said why? & he said, i don't know. it doesn't feel like home. that's the room he was in when he died.
i have to drive by that room, that house, every day, on the way to school.
i probably wasn't even in his head when he died
how does anyone do this