The Choice you didn't make Part 9 - Is it already farewell time?
Title: Is it already farewell time?
Author: aruna7
Summary: What could he say? That he was sorry? That he loved her? That he wished her all the happiness possible? All of this, and surely a few clever things, somewhere in the middle of his words.
Rating: PG-13
Lenght: Around 1350 words
Category: Angst
Pairing/Characters: Jaina/Zekk
A/N: The Choice you didn't make - Part 9, written for 10hugs
Luke Skywalker knew he would have several matters to deal with, as soon as he came back to Coruscant. Nevertheless, he had never imagined that the first person who would request to see him would happen to be Zekk. The young Jedi had stumbled on his path, as he was on his way to meet the other Masters. Luke had felt a certain grief, mixed with resignation, as he had offered to see Zekk later in the day.
Now, in the early evening, Luke was meditating in one of the meeting rooms of the Jedi Temple. He felt Zekk's presence arriving to the door. As it slid open to reveal the tall Jedi, Luke watched him enter. Zekk stopped a few steps away from Luke and sat as the Master greeted him.
”Good evening, Zekk. This has been a while, since we last talked together.”
He felt the young man's anxiety. Luke was wondering what might have happened. He had been told that an emergency meeting with Admiral Krey'Fey would take place two days later because of Zekk and his niece's most recent mission. Yet, Luke sensed that Zekk's problem had to be more personal. He waited for him to speak.
Zekk knew that Master Skywalker might be surprised, not to say bothered, by what he was to ask for, and that this would change his own life forever.
”I am aware that my wish might sound unusual, Master Skywalker; but, I would really appreciate to be allowed to leave the Jedi Order.”
Luke had to admit that he wouldn't have thought that one of the Jedi Knights, that already counted too few members, especially after the tragic Vong war, should wish to leave the Order. And Zekk was one of the last Luke would ever have expected to see willing to abandon. He sincerely hoped that Zekk would stay, and so, Luke had to know which the young man's reasons were.
”This request is indeed quite surprising and kind of disturbing, Zekk. I am certain you know what the Jedi Order had become, after all the losses the last galactic war brought. Our Order is smaller, and yet, has to achieve much more with the galaxy still fighting to get rebuild and the Padawans who need to be taught the ways of the Force. I confess that I don't want to see any of the Jedi leaving. I would like to hear the reasons of your decision because I would like to know If anything might be done for you to stay among us.”
Zekk silently nodded. He didn't want to tell Master Skywalker about all that led him to take this difficult decision, but, no matter what he felt like saying, he owed Luke some explanations.
”I know about all of this, Master Skywalker. I honestly regret having to leave, but I know that if I stay, I won't be able to achieve my duty as I should. Due to personal reasons, I wish to quit the Jedi Order. I think, this is the best option.”
Luke understood that Zekk would tell no more and he also knew the Jedi too well to think he had made this harsh choice without serious thought. Luke knew that he should grant Zekk what he was requesting.
Skywalker finally stood up, Zekk doing as well, waiting for the Master's answer.
Luke had some conditions.
”Even though I would prefer you to stay, you are free to leave the Jedi Order, Zekk. But I want you to remember that you will always be a Jedi, and that you will also have your place with us. Being a Jedi is not just about being called so, by everyone around. I know you are a true Jedi and will always be. May the Force be with you.”
Zekk nodded and bowed respectfully to show his gratitude. Luke couldn't help smiling. Zekk had become one of the most formal Jedi Knights since Jaina had brought him back from the Dark Side in their teenage years. Luke remembered Tionne who once said that Zekk had something of the Old Republic Jedi Knights. Luke couldn't agree more with her.
”Thank you for your understanding, Master Skywalker. Though I doubt It, I hope to be able to come back to Coruscant and the Jedi Order one day. May the Force be with you, as well.”
Luke nodded and watched Zekk leaving the room. Then, as the door closed, he felt his wife's presence as she joined him. He turned to face her and she looked concerned, more than he would have thought. Luke didn't need to tell her what had happened, she had understood. She came next to him and gave him a somber smile.
”You will never change Farmboy… You still understand nothing about feelings, it seems.
Luke frowned and his silent question lingered in the air. Mara sighed.
”I am afraid that after all those years, he and Jaina had a talk and that she has told him she didn't share his feelings.”
She couldn't help laughing when she saw her husband's face, then she became serious again.
”Those two won't ever be able to understand anything, I am afraid. And the Force knows, how well I know about wasting time in relationships.”
She put her hand on Luke's arm, and gently squeezed it, without noticing, but her piercing eyes were still looking beyond the closed door.
”I wish I hadn't taught Jaina, my silly ways of dealing with feelings. I'm afraid I might have…
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Zekk was almost out of the Jedi Temple, when he felt a presence he would always recognize among every others. Waiting, her arms crossed against one of the columns of the main entrance, stood Jaina. She didn't look happy. Zekk didn't know if he wanted to see her before leaving. He did crave to see her this very last moment before he would turn the page over his former life and impossible dreams. Stopping next to her, he didn't even put down the luggage with his few belongings. They remained silent before Jaina finally looked up at him.
”Is it already farewell time?”
Zekk didn't move. What could he say? That he was sorry? That he loved her? That he wished her all the happiness possible? All of this, and surely a few clever things, somewhere in the middle of his words. But, was there any point saying any thing at that moment? Surely not.
”You don't need to do that, Zekk. You could have remained In the Jedi Order, just not working with me anymore.”
Zekk sensed the glimpse of sadness in Jaina's voice, but their paths got separated, once for good, surely too late. And this was surely the best thing that could happen to them, he had come to believe. At least, he didn't need to hide his feelings from Jaina, or anyone, anymore. Things were clear and would help him feel at peace, one day in the future. And to achieve this, he had to leave and search for his own balance and keep serving the Force the best a Jedi could.
”I didn't ask you to understand, Jaina. I know what I am doing.”
He came closer and gently kissed her forehead, and whispered a few words he just had to tell her.
”Keep safe, Jaina. And may the Force be with you. Always.”
Jaina hadn't meant to do any gesture like this, but she briefly hugged him, and let him step back almost as soon as he felt her arms around him. She couldn't be angry at him, and yet, it didn't feel right to her. She watched Zekk bowing in some silly formal way to her,and felt like doing something, to make him stop this wrong choice he was making, but she just didn't know what… As Zekk was turning his back to her, and walking away, she shouted.
”Goodbye, Zekk!”
She saw him stopping, and hoped, for a couple of seconds, before she heard his reply.
”Farewell, Jaina.”
And she stood here, at the Jedi Temple entrance, watching her closer friend stepping out of her life…
Author: aruna7
Summary: What could he say? That he was sorry? That he loved her? That he wished her all the happiness possible? All of this, and surely a few clever things, somewhere in the middle of his words.
Rating: PG-13
Lenght: Around 1350 words
Category: Angst
Pairing/Characters: Jaina/Zekk
A/N: The Choice you didn't make - Part 9, written for 10hugs
Luke Skywalker knew he would have several matters to deal with, as soon as he came back to Coruscant. Nevertheless, he had never imagined that the first person who would request to see him would happen to be Zekk. The young Jedi had stumbled on his path, as he was on his way to meet the other Masters. Luke had felt a certain grief, mixed with resignation, as he had offered to see Zekk later in the day.
Now, in the early evening, Luke was meditating in one of the meeting rooms of the Jedi Temple. He felt Zekk's presence arriving to the door. As it slid open to reveal the tall Jedi, Luke watched him enter. Zekk stopped a few steps away from Luke and sat as the Master greeted him.
”Good evening, Zekk. This has been a while, since we last talked together.”
He felt the young man's anxiety. Luke was wondering what might have happened. He had been told that an emergency meeting with Admiral Krey'Fey would take place two days later because of Zekk and his niece's most recent mission. Yet, Luke sensed that Zekk's problem had to be more personal. He waited for him to speak.
Zekk knew that Master Skywalker might be surprised, not to say bothered, by what he was to ask for, and that this would change his own life forever.
”I am aware that my wish might sound unusual, Master Skywalker; but, I would really appreciate to be allowed to leave the Jedi Order.”
Luke had to admit that he wouldn't have thought that one of the Jedi Knights, that already counted too few members, especially after the tragic Vong war, should wish to leave the Order. And Zekk was one of the last Luke would ever have expected to see willing to abandon. He sincerely hoped that Zekk would stay, and so, Luke had to know which the young man's reasons were.
”This request is indeed quite surprising and kind of disturbing, Zekk. I am certain you know what the Jedi Order had become, after all the losses the last galactic war brought. Our Order is smaller, and yet, has to achieve much more with the galaxy still fighting to get rebuild and the Padawans who need to be taught the ways of the Force. I confess that I don't want to see any of the Jedi leaving. I would like to hear the reasons of your decision because I would like to know If anything might be done for you to stay among us.”
Zekk silently nodded. He didn't want to tell Master Skywalker about all that led him to take this difficult decision, but, no matter what he felt like saying, he owed Luke some explanations.
”I know about all of this, Master Skywalker. I honestly regret having to leave, but I know that if I stay, I won't be able to achieve my duty as I should. Due to personal reasons, I wish to quit the Jedi Order. I think, this is the best option.”
Luke understood that Zekk would tell no more and he also knew the Jedi too well to think he had made this harsh choice without serious thought. Luke knew that he should grant Zekk what he was requesting.
Skywalker finally stood up, Zekk doing as well, waiting for the Master's answer.
Luke had some conditions.
”Even though I would prefer you to stay, you are free to leave the Jedi Order, Zekk. But I want you to remember that you will always be a Jedi, and that you will also have your place with us. Being a Jedi is not just about being called so, by everyone around. I know you are a true Jedi and will always be. May the Force be with you.”
Zekk nodded and bowed respectfully to show his gratitude. Luke couldn't help smiling. Zekk had become one of the most formal Jedi Knights since Jaina had brought him back from the Dark Side in their teenage years. Luke remembered Tionne who once said that Zekk had something of the Old Republic Jedi Knights. Luke couldn't agree more with her.
”Thank you for your understanding, Master Skywalker. Though I doubt It, I hope to be able to come back to Coruscant and the Jedi Order one day. May the Force be with you, as well.”
Luke nodded and watched Zekk leaving the room. Then, as the door closed, he felt his wife's presence as she joined him. He turned to face her and she looked concerned, more than he would have thought. Luke didn't need to tell her what had happened, she had understood. She came next to him and gave him a somber smile.
”You will never change Farmboy… You still understand nothing about feelings, it seems.
Luke frowned and his silent question lingered in the air. Mara sighed.
”I am afraid that after all those years, he and Jaina had a talk and that she has told him she didn't share his feelings.”
She couldn't help laughing when she saw her husband's face, then she became serious again.
”Those two won't ever be able to understand anything, I am afraid. And the Force knows, how well I know about wasting time in relationships.”
She put her hand on Luke's arm, and gently squeezed it, without noticing, but her piercing eyes were still looking beyond the closed door.
”I wish I hadn't taught Jaina, my silly ways of dealing with feelings. I'm afraid I might have…
---------------------------------------
Zekk was almost out of the Jedi Temple, when he felt a presence he would always recognize among every others. Waiting, her arms crossed against one of the columns of the main entrance, stood Jaina. She didn't look happy. Zekk didn't know if he wanted to see her before leaving. He did crave to see her this very last moment before he would turn the page over his former life and impossible dreams. Stopping next to her, he didn't even put down the luggage with his few belongings. They remained silent before Jaina finally looked up at him.
”Is it already farewell time?”
Zekk didn't move. What could he say? That he was sorry? That he loved her? That he wished her all the happiness possible? All of this, and surely a few clever things, somewhere in the middle of his words. But, was there any point saying any thing at that moment? Surely not.
”You don't need to do that, Zekk. You could have remained In the Jedi Order, just not working with me anymore.”
Zekk sensed the glimpse of sadness in Jaina's voice, but their paths got separated, once for good, surely too late. And this was surely the best thing that could happen to them, he had come to believe. At least, he didn't need to hide his feelings from Jaina, or anyone, anymore. Things were clear and would help him feel at peace, one day in the future. And to achieve this, he had to leave and search for his own balance and keep serving the Force the best a Jedi could.
”I didn't ask you to understand, Jaina. I know what I am doing.”
He came closer and gently kissed her forehead, and whispered a few words he just had to tell her.
”Keep safe, Jaina. And may the Force be with you. Always.”
Jaina hadn't meant to do any gesture like this, but she briefly hugged him, and let him step back almost as soon as he felt her arms around him. She couldn't be angry at him, and yet, it didn't feel right to her. She watched Zekk bowing in some silly formal way to her,and felt like doing something, to make him stop this wrong choice he was making, but she just didn't know what… As Zekk was turning his back to her, and walking away, she shouted.
”Goodbye, Zekk!”
She saw him stopping, and hoped, for a couple of seconds, before she heard his reply.
”Farewell, Jaina.”
And she stood here, at the Jedi Temple entrance, watching her closer friend stepping out of her life…