Call and Answer: A Doumeki/Watanuki/Himawari manifesto (xxxHOLiC)
Title: Call and Answer
Author: Buddha_loves_me
Series: xxxHOLiC
Pairing:Doumeki/Watanuki/Himawari
Word count: 4,495
Spoilers: Detailed explanations of the entire series, so expect spoilers.
Notes: This took a long time for me to write, and I was unsure how to go about it. So I hope it’s enjoyable and understandable and I’m able to convey my… stupid amount of love for this pairing. I agonized over it because it’s just so… hard to explain why I love this pairing so much, so I hope that I was able to convey it. I’ll probably be editing this manifesto a lot within the next couple of days…
Scan credits: All scans were collected from free_manga. The linked pages are, naturally, from onemanga. The graphics were edited by me; the raw scans are from nefadol (if I remember correctly.)
The Series
Everything happens because of Hitsuzen
xxxHOLiC is a relatively new series by the popular manga-ka group “CLAMP.” Known for their unique style and noteworthy ability to mesh shoujo and shounen themes into a unifying blend, CLAMP is responsible for countless series, all varying in plot, style, and length. xxxHOLiC is one of their longer series, and centers around a magical shop owned by the powerful and mysterious witch, Ichihara Yuuko. This magical shop is very special. This shop grants wishes, for a price.
The characters of xxxHOLiC occupy a series filled with mysticism, intrigue, ambiguity, and prevailing themes of inevitability, sacrifice, self-worth, and change. The series deals with the bridge between the human realm and the spiritual world. The main character, Watanuki Kimihiro, comes to know Yuuko because of his wish. With the promise that she will help grant his wish, Watanuki becomes something of an indentured servant to Yuuko. Growing and changing, Watanuki undergoes subtle, yet powerful, change throughout the course of the series, through the help of Yuuko, and the other two featured characters of this manifesto: Doumeki Shizuka and Kunogi Himawari.
Watanuki Kimihiro
Watanuki is the protagonist of xxxHOLiC. A young man in high school, Watanuki has a strange gift: he has the ability to see and attract spirits. The spirits are attracted to his blood and constantly haunt him. Of course, this is not desirable for him, so when he stumbles upon Yuuko’s wish shop one day, seemingly unwillingly, he hesitantly agrees to be a servant to Yuuko in order for her to grant him his wish. Serving as a mentor and an unorthodox mother-figure, Yuuko ushers in the beginning of a change for Watanuki, and he grows and develops drastically throughout the course of the series.
The best way to describe Watanuki is that he’s the kindest person on earth. He cares deeply for everyone (though he may protest caring about Doumeki at all) and is generally very friendly and empathetic. He’s a kind person but not without his temper. He’s very expressive, and often seen fighting and yelling at Doumeki and Yuuko (though less so as the series progresses, but it never goes away completely.)
Early on in the series, Watanuki was shown as an individual who placed no value on his life. He was oftentimes willing to act as a martyr so long as no one else was hurt and possessed subconscious suicidal tendencies he himself could not remember. But through a series of events (which will be covered later on in this manifesto,) Watanuki changed. He’s accepted that he cares about others and they care about him, and that hurting himself would make those people sad.
Of course, things are not that simple for Watanuki. It’s revealed that Watanuki cannot remember many things, and wavers between wakefulness and sleep. He can’t remember many things about his childhood, including the names of his mother and father. Unknown to Watanuki, he’s given his memories away as a price to help Syaoran (of CLAMP’s other series Tsubasa), someone with whom he is deeply connected (as of now, canon is still ambiguous, and the explanation is long and complicated, and, frankly, irrelevant to this ship manifesto.) His lack of memories, however, gives him sources of issues that he must resolve.
Doumeki Shizuka
Where Watanuki is loud and expressive, Doumeki is quiet and stoic. Doumeki doesn’t speak a lot, and when he’s first introduced, he and Watanuki are not friendly with one another. Watanuki has a seemingly irrational hatred for the boy, and Doumeki doesn’t seem to care either way, often calling him an idiot and sending Watanuki off into another flurry of anger.
Yuuko informs Watanuki that it is better if he got along with Doumeki, to which Watanuki flails and protests. Doumeki lives at a temple, and is thus familiar with the supernatural world that Watanuki is forced to interact with. Though he cannot see the spirits himself, he has inherited the exorcist powers that his deceased grandfather possessed. A master archer, Doumeki, with instruction from Yuuko, is able to eliminate the threats of cruel spirits trying to eat Watanuki. It is in this way that Yuuko informs Watanuki that so long as he’s around Doumeki, the spirits will stay away because of his clean aura. This knowledge, of course, infuriates Watanuki.
Doumeki is a strong and independent young man. He cares deeply for Watanuki, even if he rarely shows it. He seems to enjoy antagonizing him, if only for the hilarious reactions they illicit.
For all his stoicism and seeming indifference, Doumeki cares deeply for those around him. He also seems to be one of the healthiest CLAMP characters ever, lacking any mysterious, depressing pasts and severely lacking the issues both Watanuki and Himawari possess. Of course, I’ve probably gone and jinxed the poor guy by just typing that out.
Kunogi Himawari
Himawari is the girl that Watanuki fawns over. His crush and the highlight of his day, in Watanuki’s eyes Himawari can do no wrong. She’s the kind, sweet girl-next-door type. Always smiling, she’s cheerful and friendly, especially around Watanuki. She and Watanuki hit it off and become friends, with Doumeki there along for the ride (much to Watanuki’s chagrin.) At first glance, she appears to be a bit of a ditz and perhaps painfully unaware of Watanuki’s affections, but this is merely a front.
Himawari, in actuality, makes efforts to keep her distance from people. While remaining friendly and kind, there is definitely a boundary between herself and other people. Yuuko warned Watanuki that Himawari is not good for Watanuki, not because she lacks anything in her personality, but because she is not something lucky for Watanuki.
This, it is later revealed, is because Himawari has the curse of bad luck. The reason and origin of this curse is unknown even to Himawari. She was born with it, and has lived through seeing terrible things happen to the people around her (her parents are the only ones exempt, for if they had bad luck she never would have been born.) Because of this, Himawari has issues getting close to people. She keeps her distance, always smiling to hide the truth. She’s afraid to let people close to her because of this curse, but even so, she can’t help but become close to Watanuki and Doumeki, and this proves almost fatal.
Canon Interaction
For me, I divide the OT3 interaction into two halves. The first half is pre volume 10, and the other half is post volume 10. Volume 10, as I will cover shortly, marks the point where everything changes for the three of them. It was volume 10 in which I first started taking notice of this pairing, and saw the possibilities and nuances of their relationship.
Before volume 10, the interaction between the three is relatively benign. They’re seen together occasionally, for picnic lunches or outings. Himawari is often there to point out how close the two boys are whenever Watanuki is busy flailing and cursing out Doumeki. The three of them do things together, which is noteworthy considering Watanuki’s insistence that he can’t stand Doumeki, while adoring Himawari.
Most of the interaction between Himawari and Watanuki consists of him flailing over her and getting deeply angered at the idea of her liking someone else. (He does a lot; quite a bit, actually; I’m not kidding!)
Himawari is often the one to point out the things that Watanuki refuses to admit himself in regards to Doumeki. She often remarks on how close of a relationship the two have, much to Watanuki’s insistence to the contrary, saying things like “Watanuki-kun and Doumeki-kun have such a close relationship!” This is my personal interpretation, as fandom takes this as evidence that Himawari is a Doumeki/Watanuki shipper, but I always saw it more as Himawari’s attempts to push Watanuki towards Doumeki and away from her, as to protect him from her curse. There’s no canon evidence for this other than my own feelings towards Himawari’s character and personality, and the fact that after volume 10, these instances seem to have disappeared (unless I missed one.)
Though their appearances with all three are few and far between, it’s clear that both Doumeki and Himawari care for Watanuki. After Watanuki has lost his eye by taking on a spider’s grudge for Doumeki (something that is seemingly counter to his “I don’t care about him!” mentality,) Himawari tells Doumeki that she hopes he’ll be okay soon while watching Watanuki retreat from the scene. Doumeki looks concerned, and vigorously looks for a way to get Watanuki’s eye back. This moment between the two reveals their joint concern for Watanuki, and their ability to confine in one another those worries.
The largest bulk of interaction for the three comes during and after volume 10, in which the “window scene” takes place. This event begins with Watanuki’s realization that there is something strange about Himawari. He’d had his suspicions but hadn’t wanted to think about it, and never brought it up with her. Spooked when she touches his shoulder, he seems to have a moment of realization. Unaware of his realization, Himawari asks if he’s okay. He dismisses his thoughts and reassures her. But then the shoulder that she’d touched bumps against the window and he falls from it and down to the world below in midst of broken glass and blood.
When he awakens, he is in Yuuko’s shop. Unaware of what’s gone on, he speaks with Yuuko, who reveals that three people have paid a price to make sure that he wouldn’t “disappear.” One of those people is Himawari, who appears in the doorway to speak with him. He asks her what she’s doing here and Yuuko explains it is because she is needed here.
Watanuki is quick to try and reassure her, but Himawari is no longer smiling. When he says that he was okay, her reply is serious. He stares at her, and for the first time realizes her aura is dark.
Watanuki can’t keep silent any longer, and apologetically admits that whenever he’s around her, he notices that something bad always happens.
Himawari responds with what could be described as the most heartbreaking and tragic smile ever, saying, “So you finally noticed?” Watanuki is stunned. From there, Himawari unveils the truth about herself: she is cursed and causes misfortune everywhere she goes. She recounts the tragedies she’s caused in her life, smiling the entire time and remaining painfully calmed during the exchange.
After she’s told Watanuki everything, she steps away, turning her back to him and saying goodbye. She starts moving, certain that he’ll hate her and want her out of her life. She’s prepared herself for that moment when he would despise her for everything. But, instead, Watanuki calls her back.
He apologizes for worrying her and that despite everything, that he’ll make something for her to make up for it, and he’s very glad to have met her. She keeps her back to him before slowly turning around and warning him that next time he might die. He promises that he won’t. He assures her that it was okay because he wanted to see Himawari happy, because he loves her. She’s silent for a moment before smiling and telling him that she wanted chiffon cake. With that, she leaves Watanuki to rest.
She closes the door behind her, and Doumeki is waiting there, covered in blood. His price for keeping Watanuki alive was to give up his blood to make up for all the blood Watanuki had lost. Himawari smiles at him and tells him to keep the chiffon cake a secret, because it’s supposed to be for Watanuki and herself. She’s reserved and distant, expecting Doumeki to reject her as well. Instead, he says that they’ll eat bento together soon. Himawari is surprised again, but continues to smile all the same.
Back with Yuuko, Watanuki asks about Himawari’s luck, but is told by Yuuko that the cost to have him get rid of her luck would be all of her happiness. When he asks what Himawari had to pay, Yuuko says that Himawari didn’t want him to know. Watanuki falls asleep while asking what Doumeki paid. Yuuko steps outside of the shop and speaking with Doumeki, whose price was the amount of blood that Watanuki lost. Their wish was granted, the wish that Watanuki would not disappear.
It’s only after Himawari’s left the shop that the tears come. She cries to herself, scolding Watanuki for making her cry after promising he wouldn’t, and that she was so, so happy to have met him, too. She touches her back and says to him, though he cannot hear, that she was so happy to have taken his scars as the price to keep him alive, and that above all, she was happy to have met him, too.
Then marks what I call post volume 10, though technically the next few events listed here happen in volume 10:
After six days of sleeping, Watanuki awakens to Yuuko. The first thing he asks is whether Himawari was alright. They discuss Himawari, and Watanuki muses over finding a way to cure her misfortune. But he knows that if he did something behind her back, she would be hurt, which is something he never wants. But he vows to do what he can to make her happy. Yuuko gives Watanuki an egg as payment for retrieving water from a well. She tells him that whatever is born from it will be because of his heart. With that, Watanuki fell asleep and dreams. In his dream, he speaks with the being within the egg and tells it that he wants her to be happy. With that pure, honest thought, the creature in the egg says that he’ll be born for her sake, in order to make her truly happy.
When Watanuki awakens, there is a little yellow bird on his bed sheets. Yuuko tells him that that creature was born from his pure thoughts, and that the little bird will not be affected by Himawari’s curse.
Once he’s better, Watanuki heads to school and sees that Doumeki and Himawari are both waiting for him. Himawari’s hair is changed, in order to hide her scars because she doesn’t want Watanuki to see. As Watanuki talks with Himawari, Doumeki inspects him for wounds, which Himawari explains to Watanuki. Himwari notices the bird right away and comments on how cute it is. Watanuki gives it to her, insisting that he was born for her when Himawari tries to refuse. Touched, Himawari accepts the bird and thanks him with a warm smile.
Back in school again, things return relatively to normal. A new customer arrives to Yuuko’s, and Watanuki continues his work as Yuuko’s pseudo-servant. A little scene between the three shortly after the window incident reveals their dynamic, reminiscent of their times together before but evolved. Watanuki asks Himawari if she’d like to go home with him, and she says that she’s busy. Watanuki asks if it couldn’t just wait, and Himawari’s look of surprise reveals that there really weren’t any plans to begin with, that this was actually just an attempt to keep her distance. Watanuki explains that he’d really like to spend time with Himawari. Himawari looks lost for words, and when Doumeki reveals himself and informs them of a good place to have cake, it provides a comical reaction from Watanuki.
After Watanuki continues on his way with a promise to spend time with Himawari, Himawari and Doumeki are left to themselves. She confines in him yet again over her attempts to stay away and how he just wouldn’t let her. She’s smiling, but looks unsure about herself. Doumeki, ever the infinite talker, merely states “So… Do you have anything to do today?”
This moment between the three reveals Himawari’s attempts, after everything, to stay away, and the two boys’ absolute refusal to let her. They both care about her deeply, and she, in turn, cares about them. Above all else, they’re friends. Through the tragedy of Watanuki’s near-death, they have grown and matured, and become closer because of it.
After that, the three are closer than ever. Watanuki makes gloves for them, while trying to write off the ones he made for Doumeki as just a good way to use scraps (though Himawari really doesn’t let him get away with that.)
They celebrate Watanuki’s birthday, with the similar dynamic of Watanuki getting mad at Doumeki and Himawari finding them amusing. The scene with the three of them (plus Yuuko and Mokona) is sweet and a good sum up of how the three of them operate together. Both Doumeki and Himawari give Watanuki presents. Himawari’s gift is an apron with a cat on it that she bought, with the promise she would make him something next year. Doumeki also gives an apron, though the reaction isn’t quite the same as with Himawari.
Once Watanuki realizes, through a conversation with Sakura who has arrived in the dream world, that he cannot remember a lot of his memories, including his parents, he suffers something akin to an identity crisis. It explains the strange instances happening to Watanuki, in which his memories don’t make sense or he has moments when he has “disappeared,” or experience moments of inexistence. Distraught, he’s unsure who he is, where he is, or what’s happening to him. He worries that everything he’s experienced has been nothing but a dream. Or, worse yet, that everything he knows will disappear, or he himself will disappear. Earlier in the series, Watanuki was willing to make sacrifices for others at the cost of his own well-being, even to the point where he would blind himself for someone else, or be alone because someone else (Syaoran) was alone.
Through this crisis, he meets with Yuuko in a dream. He asks her these questions and more, and while Yuuko cannot or will not answer his questions, she reassures that he is human. They hug.
After awakening, Watanuki goes to school and muses to himself, mostly things along the lines of that he feels this or sees that, so therefore he must exist… unless it really is all a dream. Muttering to himself, he runs into Doumeki. Watanuki is more reserved than usual, and instead of throwing into a fit as he usually does he asks if Doumeki likes the food he makes. After Doumeki makes a comment that Watanuki disapproves of, however, he snaps back to normal and yells at him. This is where Himawari finds them. But even Himawari notices that he is different from normal. Watanuki explains, thanks to his earlier epiphany of possibly being merely in a dream, that he was just glad to see her. Himawari smiles and agrees.
After this scene, Kohane’s arc begins and Himawari disappears for twenty-something chapters. Doumeki and Watanuki work to protect and help Kohane, who is trying to help her mother as best she can. Watanuki puts himself in harms way in order to protect Kohane, and after everything is said and done and Kohane is safe, Doumeki asks him why he was so reckless. Watanuki admits that he trusted Doumeki to make sure nothing bad happened.
When Himawari does appear again, she’s back to her usual stance: laughing at the silliness between Doumeki and Watanuki. Her insecurities haven’t disappeared completely, despite the reassurances that the two care about her. Watanuki invites her to have cake, and she goes through several emotions before telling him she’s “looking forward to it” and inviting Doumeki along.
The Pairing
Why it Works
To me, the three of them together in a pairing is something that’s natural and necessary. The three of them complete one another, and ground one another. The problem I see with monogamous pairings between the three is that it somehow excludes another. Doumeki/Watanuki excludes and downplays Himawari’s importance. Watanuki/Himawari brushes off the subtext between Doumeki and Watanuki (which is there.) And Doumeki/Himawari doesn’t… actually exist in fandom (even though I ship it a lot, uh...)
The thing is, Watanuki loves and cares for both of them dearly. He’s admitted to loving Himawari, to wanting to see her smile, and his fawning over her persists even after knowing about her curse. He adores her and wants to see her happy. But, in addition, he has undergone great changes in his relationship to Doumeki. They started out hating each other, and while Watanuki is quick to snap out at Doumeki, he’s admitted to trusting him. He cares for both of them. And they, in turn, care for him, too.
Doumeki has done a lot for Watanuki, and Watanuki for Doumeki. I couldn’t go into extreme details in this manifesto, as I tried to focus on moments between the three of them, but at the very least Doumeki has an extremely important role in protecting and watching over Watanuki. Kohane told him to take care of Watanuki. Yuuko gave Doumeki an egg to hold onto the promise day so that the “last moment won’t be the last.” Doumeki originally was around Watanuki because he helped dispel the evil spirits trying to hurt him. He looks after and protects Watanuki, much to the latter’s chagrin. Because I couldn’t go into detail about it, I direct you towards the Doumeki/Watanuki manifesto written by aishuu, which covers a good portion of their relationship and sacrifices for one another (though it isn’t up to date with current canon, as it was written a few years ago.)
Doumeki cares about Watanuki, and even if Watanuki is loath to admit it, he cares about Doumeki, as well. At the very least, he trusts him. They have plenty of subtext to be a pairing and to love one another. They’ve undergone a lot of development from the earlier volumes to current canon. They trust one another, enough now that Watanuki can admit to Doumeki the things that bother and burden him.
But Himawari is also just as important to Watanuki. He loves her, he fawns over her, and he adores her. Despite knowing that she’s bad luck, despite knowing that he would bring him misfortune and could kill him, he doesn’t care because he loves her. He promised he wouldn’t die, and he genuinely wants to live now… and being happy means being with her. She, too, loves and cares about him. If anyone says otherwise, they need to reread volume 10. A girl doesn’t take someone’s scars unless she truly cares about them, especially in a culture like Japan where scars can permanently destroy a girl’s chances of being considered “beautiful” or getting married (not that the latter was ever on the table in Himawari’s mind, I think is fair to say.) If she didn’t love him, she wouldn’t have cried from sheer relief for him being alive, and for him being happy to have met her. No one has ever said that to her before, and she is touched by it.
The relationship between Doumeki and Himawari is unexplored and underdeveloped. xxxHOLiC takes place from Watanuki’s point of view, so it’s to be expected that the relationship and canon interaction would take place in or around Watanuki. But in the moments they have together, it’s clear that they care about one another and have a mutual respect for one another. Before volume 10, the two of them are cordial to one another, and on friendly terms. Himawari has helped Doumeki with school work or with serving drinks, and talked together about Watanuki. After volume 10, Himawari expects Doumeki to push her away, too, but he merely insists on the three of them staying together. He, like Watanuki, doesn’t let Himawari get too far away. And with Doumeki neutralizing her bad luck, in a sense, the three of them can be together without having to worry about Watanuki falling out a window again.
It’s clear that both Doumeki and Himawari love Watanuki, and that he loves them.
Because they love each other, whether platonically or non-platonically, they will stay together. They want to stay together. Doumeki and Watanuki refuse to let Himawari to get away. Doumeki and Himawari refuse to let Watanuki disappear. Watanuki and Himawari rely on Doumeki for his stability and because he is unaffected by Himawari’s curse due to his pure aura (Yuuko said that Tanpopo would not be affected by Himawari's curse "like Doumeki", so the extent to which Doumeki is unaffected and/or neutralizes Himawari's curse is mostly speculation at this point rooted in canon at least on some level.) They complete one another.
Fandom
Their compatibility is one of the main reasons why I myself ship them. When I first got into fandom and read xxxHOLiC, I was a Dou/Wata shipper. As I went further in the series, however, I fell in love with Himawari and the dynamic between the three of them. Now, I can’t appreciate Dou/Wata like I used to, because it just feels empty without Himawari. To me, they were made for one another, and complete one another. Whether platonic or shippy, I love them together.
The main, popular pairing in xxxHOLiC fandom is, without a doubt, Doumeki/Watanuki. Fics of them are the most prominent and their pairing comm is very active. When Himawari’s featured in these stories, which is rarely more than a mention, it’s for her to be there to fangirl them, as is the fate of many female characters in fandom. Slight fandom bias aside, the amount of fic featuring the OT3 in a non-platonic sense (or even platonic) are few and far between. But the ones out there are wonderful reads and I adore every single one. If I could, I’d list them all for you to enjoy, but as that would be tedious and this is supposed to be an introduction to the pairing and not a hardcore delve, I’ll list some of my personal favorites.
Fanfiction:
Deep as the Wine-Dark Sea by allira_dream: There are no words for how beautifully written this piece is.
Chrysallis by vicious_lullaby: This writer has quite a few fic for the OT3, but this one is so poignant and lovely it nearly makes you cry. I… just wish I could list every single fic this writer has written for the OT3. I love them all so, so much. In fact, have the OT3 tag!
Silence in the Presence of Contentment by doumeki: Sweet and lovely fic about Watanuki’s birthday; she’s written a few others featuring the OT3 and I highly recommend all of them.
Other:
You Know I Love You So: A Doumeki/Watanuki/Himawari FST by Buddha_loves_me: Yeah, I feel lame doing a self-post in my own manifesto, but whatever.
Wings Made of Wishes: A Doumeki/Watanuki/Himawari FST by epicureal: another great FST with such pretty songs that fit the three of them perfectly!
Communities:
xxx_holic: General xxxHOLiC community
chiffon_cake: Community dedicated to the OT3
holic_ot3: Community dedicated to any threesome in xxxHOLiC
holic_girls: Community dedicated to all the holic girls, with no boys allowed (unless accompanied by a female escort~!) There are a few OT3 fics listed
Author: Buddha_loves_me
Series: xxxHOLiC
Pairing:Doumeki/Watanuki/Himawari
Word count: 4,495
Spoilers: Detailed explanations of the entire series, so expect spoilers.
Notes: This took a long time for me to write, and I was unsure how to go about it. So I hope it’s enjoyable and understandable and I’m able to convey my… stupid amount of love for this pairing. I agonized over it because it’s just so… hard to explain why I love this pairing so much, so I hope that I was able to convey it. I’ll probably be editing this manifesto a lot within the next couple of days…
Scan credits: All scans were collected from free_manga. The linked pages are, naturally, from onemanga. The graphics were edited by me; the raw scans are from nefadol (if I remember correctly.)
The Series
Everything happens because of Hitsuzen
xxxHOLiC is a relatively new series by the popular manga-ka group “CLAMP.” Known for their unique style and noteworthy ability to mesh shoujo and shounen themes into a unifying blend, CLAMP is responsible for countless series, all varying in plot, style, and length. xxxHOLiC is one of their longer series, and centers around a magical shop owned by the powerful and mysterious witch, Ichihara Yuuko. This magical shop is very special. This shop grants wishes, for a price.
The characters of xxxHOLiC occupy a series filled with mysticism, intrigue, ambiguity, and prevailing themes of inevitability, sacrifice, self-worth, and change. The series deals with the bridge between the human realm and the spiritual world. The main character, Watanuki Kimihiro, comes to know Yuuko because of his wish. With the promise that she will help grant his wish, Watanuki becomes something of an indentured servant to Yuuko. Growing and changing, Watanuki undergoes subtle, yet powerful, change throughout the course of the series, through the help of Yuuko, and the other two featured characters of this manifesto: Doumeki Shizuka and Kunogi Himawari.
Watanuki Kimihiro
Watanuki is the protagonist of xxxHOLiC. A young man in high school, Watanuki has a strange gift: he has the ability to see and attract spirits. The spirits are attracted to his blood and constantly haunt him. Of course, this is not desirable for him, so when he stumbles upon Yuuko’s wish shop one day, seemingly unwillingly, he hesitantly agrees to be a servant to Yuuko in order for her to grant him his wish. Serving as a mentor and an unorthodox mother-figure, Yuuko ushers in the beginning of a change for Watanuki, and he grows and develops drastically throughout the course of the series.
The best way to describe Watanuki is that he’s the kindest person on earth. He cares deeply for everyone (though he may protest caring about Doumeki at all) and is generally very friendly and empathetic. He’s a kind person but not without his temper. He’s very expressive, and often seen fighting and yelling at Doumeki and Yuuko (though less so as the series progresses, but it never goes away completely.)
Early on in the series, Watanuki was shown as an individual who placed no value on his life. He was oftentimes willing to act as a martyr so long as no one else was hurt and possessed subconscious suicidal tendencies he himself could not remember. But through a series of events (which will be covered later on in this manifesto,) Watanuki changed. He’s accepted that he cares about others and they care about him, and that hurting himself would make those people sad.
Of course, things are not that simple for Watanuki. It’s revealed that Watanuki cannot remember many things, and wavers between wakefulness and sleep. He can’t remember many things about his childhood, including the names of his mother and father. Unknown to Watanuki, he’s given his memories away as a price to help Syaoran (of CLAMP’s other series Tsubasa), someone with whom he is deeply connected (as of now, canon is still ambiguous, and the explanation is long and complicated, and, frankly, irrelevant to this ship manifesto.) His lack of memories, however, gives him sources of issues that he must resolve.
Doumeki Shizuka
Where Watanuki is loud and expressive, Doumeki is quiet and stoic. Doumeki doesn’t speak a lot, and when he’s first introduced, he and Watanuki are not friendly with one another. Watanuki has a seemingly irrational hatred for the boy, and Doumeki doesn’t seem to care either way, often calling him an idiot and sending Watanuki off into another flurry of anger.
Yuuko informs Watanuki that it is better if he got along with Doumeki, to which Watanuki flails and protests. Doumeki lives at a temple, and is thus familiar with the supernatural world that Watanuki is forced to interact with. Though he cannot see the spirits himself, he has inherited the exorcist powers that his deceased grandfather possessed. A master archer, Doumeki, with instruction from Yuuko, is able to eliminate the threats of cruel spirits trying to eat Watanuki. It is in this way that Yuuko informs Watanuki that so long as he’s around Doumeki, the spirits will stay away because of his clean aura. This knowledge, of course, infuriates Watanuki.
Doumeki is a strong and independent young man. He cares deeply for Watanuki, even if he rarely shows it. He seems to enjoy antagonizing him, if only for the hilarious reactions they illicit.
For all his stoicism and seeming indifference, Doumeki cares deeply for those around him. He also seems to be one of the healthiest CLAMP characters ever, lacking any mysterious, depressing pasts and severely lacking the issues both Watanuki and Himawari possess. Of course, I’ve probably gone and jinxed the poor guy by just typing that out.
Kunogi Himawari
Himawari is the girl that Watanuki fawns over. His crush and the highlight of his day, in Watanuki’s eyes Himawari can do no wrong. She’s the kind, sweet girl-next-door type. Always smiling, she’s cheerful and friendly, especially around Watanuki. She and Watanuki hit it off and become friends, with Doumeki there along for the ride (much to Watanuki’s chagrin.) At first glance, she appears to be a bit of a ditz and perhaps painfully unaware of Watanuki’s affections, but this is merely a front.
Himawari, in actuality, makes efforts to keep her distance from people. While remaining friendly and kind, there is definitely a boundary between herself and other people. Yuuko warned Watanuki that Himawari is not good for Watanuki, not because she lacks anything in her personality, but because she is not something lucky for Watanuki.
This, it is later revealed, is because Himawari has the curse of bad luck. The reason and origin of this curse is unknown even to Himawari. She was born with it, and has lived through seeing terrible things happen to the people around her (her parents are the only ones exempt, for if they had bad luck she never would have been born.) Because of this, Himawari has issues getting close to people. She keeps her distance, always smiling to hide the truth. She’s afraid to let people close to her because of this curse, but even so, she can’t help but become close to Watanuki and Doumeki, and this proves almost fatal.
Canon Interaction
For me, I divide the OT3 interaction into two halves. The first half is pre volume 10, and the other half is post volume 10. Volume 10, as I will cover shortly, marks the point where everything changes for the three of them. It was volume 10 in which I first started taking notice of this pairing, and saw the possibilities and nuances of their relationship.
Before volume 10, the interaction between the three is relatively benign. They’re seen together occasionally, for picnic lunches or outings. Himawari is often there to point out how close the two boys are whenever Watanuki is busy flailing and cursing out Doumeki. The three of them do things together, which is noteworthy considering Watanuki’s insistence that he can’t stand Doumeki, while adoring Himawari.
Most of the interaction between Himawari and Watanuki consists of him flailing over her and getting deeply angered at the idea of her liking someone else. (He does a lot; quite a bit, actually; I’m not kidding!)
Himawari is often the one to point out the things that Watanuki refuses to admit himself in regards to Doumeki. She often remarks on how close of a relationship the two have, much to Watanuki’s insistence to the contrary, saying things like “Watanuki-kun and Doumeki-kun have such a close relationship!” This is my personal interpretation, as fandom takes this as evidence that Himawari is a Doumeki/Watanuki shipper, but I always saw it more as Himawari’s attempts to push Watanuki towards Doumeki and away from her, as to protect him from her curse. There’s no canon evidence for this other than my own feelings towards Himawari’s character and personality, and the fact that after volume 10, these instances seem to have disappeared (unless I missed one.)
Though their appearances with all three are few and far between, it’s clear that both Doumeki and Himawari care for Watanuki. After Watanuki has lost his eye by taking on a spider’s grudge for Doumeki (something that is seemingly counter to his “I don’t care about him!” mentality,) Himawari tells Doumeki that she hopes he’ll be okay soon while watching Watanuki retreat from the scene. Doumeki looks concerned, and vigorously looks for a way to get Watanuki’s eye back. This moment between the two reveals their joint concern for Watanuki, and their ability to confine in one another those worries.
The largest bulk of interaction for the three comes during and after volume 10, in which the “window scene” takes place. This event begins with Watanuki’s realization that there is something strange about Himawari. He’d had his suspicions but hadn’t wanted to think about it, and never brought it up with her. Spooked when she touches his shoulder, he seems to have a moment of realization. Unaware of his realization, Himawari asks if he’s okay. He dismisses his thoughts and reassures her. But then the shoulder that she’d touched bumps against the window and he falls from it and down to the world below in midst of broken glass and blood.
When he awakens, he is in Yuuko’s shop. Unaware of what’s gone on, he speaks with Yuuko, who reveals that three people have paid a price to make sure that he wouldn’t “disappear.” One of those people is Himawari, who appears in the doorway to speak with him. He asks her what she’s doing here and Yuuko explains it is because she is needed here.
Watanuki is quick to try and reassure her, but Himawari is no longer smiling. When he says that he was okay, her reply is serious. He stares at her, and for the first time realizes her aura is dark.
Watanuki can’t keep silent any longer, and apologetically admits that whenever he’s around her, he notices that something bad always happens.
Himawari responds with what could be described as the most heartbreaking and tragic smile ever, saying, “So you finally noticed?” Watanuki is stunned. From there, Himawari unveils the truth about herself: she is cursed and causes misfortune everywhere she goes. She recounts the tragedies she’s caused in her life, smiling the entire time and remaining painfully calmed during the exchange.
After she’s told Watanuki everything, she steps away, turning her back to him and saying goodbye. She starts moving, certain that he’ll hate her and want her out of her life. She’s prepared herself for that moment when he would despise her for everything. But, instead, Watanuki calls her back.
He apologizes for worrying her and that despite everything, that he’ll make something for her to make up for it, and he’s very glad to have met her. She keeps her back to him before slowly turning around and warning him that next time he might die. He promises that he won’t. He assures her that it was okay because he wanted to see Himawari happy, because he loves her. She’s silent for a moment before smiling and telling him that she wanted chiffon cake. With that, she leaves Watanuki to rest.
She closes the door behind her, and Doumeki is waiting there, covered in blood. His price for keeping Watanuki alive was to give up his blood to make up for all the blood Watanuki had lost. Himawari smiles at him and tells him to keep the chiffon cake a secret, because it’s supposed to be for Watanuki and herself. She’s reserved and distant, expecting Doumeki to reject her as well. Instead, he says that they’ll eat bento together soon. Himawari is surprised again, but continues to smile all the same.
Back with Yuuko, Watanuki asks about Himawari’s luck, but is told by Yuuko that the cost to have him get rid of her luck would be all of her happiness. When he asks what Himawari had to pay, Yuuko says that Himawari didn’t want him to know. Watanuki falls asleep while asking what Doumeki paid. Yuuko steps outside of the shop and speaking with Doumeki, whose price was the amount of blood that Watanuki lost. Their wish was granted, the wish that Watanuki would not disappear.
It’s only after Himawari’s left the shop that the tears come. She cries to herself, scolding Watanuki for making her cry after promising he wouldn’t, and that she was so, so happy to have met him, too. She touches her back and says to him, though he cannot hear, that she was so happy to have taken his scars as the price to keep him alive, and that above all, she was happy to have met him, too.
Then marks what I call post volume 10, though technically the next few events listed here happen in volume 10:
After six days of sleeping, Watanuki awakens to Yuuko. The first thing he asks is whether Himawari was alright. They discuss Himawari, and Watanuki muses over finding a way to cure her misfortune. But he knows that if he did something behind her back, she would be hurt, which is something he never wants. But he vows to do what he can to make her happy. Yuuko gives Watanuki an egg as payment for retrieving water from a well. She tells him that whatever is born from it will be because of his heart. With that, Watanuki fell asleep and dreams. In his dream, he speaks with the being within the egg and tells it that he wants her to be happy. With that pure, honest thought, the creature in the egg says that he’ll be born for her sake, in order to make her truly happy.
When Watanuki awakens, there is a little yellow bird on his bed sheets. Yuuko tells him that that creature was born from his pure thoughts, and that the little bird will not be affected by Himawari’s curse.
Once he’s better, Watanuki heads to school and sees that Doumeki and Himawari are both waiting for him. Himawari’s hair is changed, in order to hide her scars because she doesn’t want Watanuki to see. As Watanuki talks with Himawari, Doumeki inspects him for wounds, which Himawari explains to Watanuki. Himwari notices the bird right away and comments on how cute it is. Watanuki gives it to her, insisting that he was born for her when Himawari tries to refuse. Touched, Himawari accepts the bird and thanks him with a warm smile.
Back in school again, things return relatively to normal. A new customer arrives to Yuuko’s, and Watanuki continues his work as Yuuko’s pseudo-servant. A little scene between the three shortly after the window incident reveals their dynamic, reminiscent of their times together before but evolved. Watanuki asks Himawari if she’d like to go home with him, and she says that she’s busy. Watanuki asks if it couldn’t just wait, and Himawari’s look of surprise reveals that there really weren’t any plans to begin with, that this was actually just an attempt to keep her distance. Watanuki explains that he’d really like to spend time with Himawari. Himawari looks lost for words, and when Doumeki reveals himself and informs them of a good place to have cake, it provides a comical reaction from Watanuki.
After Watanuki continues on his way with a promise to spend time with Himawari, Himawari and Doumeki are left to themselves. She confines in him yet again over her attempts to stay away and how he just wouldn’t let her. She’s smiling, but looks unsure about herself. Doumeki, ever the infinite talker, merely states “So… Do you have anything to do today?”
This moment between the three reveals Himawari’s attempts, after everything, to stay away, and the two boys’ absolute refusal to let her. They both care about her deeply, and she, in turn, cares about them. Above all else, they’re friends. Through the tragedy of Watanuki’s near-death, they have grown and matured, and become closer because of it.
After that, the three are closer than ever. Watanuki makes gloves for them, while trying to write off the ones he made for Doumeki as just a good way to use scraps (though Himawari really doesn’t let him get away with that.)
They celebrate Watanuki’s birthday, with the similar dynamic of Watanuki getting mad at Doumeki and Himawari finding them amusing. The scene with the three of them (plus Yuuko and Mokona) is sweet and a good sum up of how the three of them operate together. Both Doumeki and Himawari give Watanuki presents. Himawari’s gift is an apron with a cat on it that she bought, with the promise she would make him something next year. Doumeki also gives an apron, though the reaction isn’t quite the same as with Himawari.
Once Watanuki realizes, through a conversation with Sakura who has arrived in the dream world, that he cannot remember a lot of his memories, including his parents, he suffers something akin to an identity crisis. It explains the strange instances happening to Watanuki, in which his memories don’t make sense or he has moments when he has “disappeared,” or experience moments of inexistence. Distraught, he’s unsure who he is, where he is, or what’s happening to him. He worries that everything he’s experienced has been nothing but a dream. Or, worse yet, that everything he knows will disappear, or he himself will disappear. Earlier in the series, Watanuki was willing to make sacrifices for others at the cost of his own well-being, even to the point where he would blind himself for someone else, or be alone because someone else (Syaoran) was alone.
Through this crisis, he meets with Yuuko in a dream. He asks her these questions and more, and while Yuuko cannot or will not answer his questions, she reassures that he is human. They hug.
After awakening, Watanuki goes to school and muses to himself, mostly things along the lines of that he feels this or sees that, so therefore he must exist… unless it really is all a dream. Muttering to himself, he runs into Doumeki. Watanuki is more reserved than usual, and instead of throwing into a fit as he usually does he asks if Doumeki likes the food he makes. After Doumeki makes a comment that Watanuki disapproves of, however, he snaps back to normal and yells at him. This is where Himawari finds them. But even Himawari notices that he is different from normal. Watanuki explains, thanks to his earlier epiphany of possibly being merely in a dream, that he was just glad to see her. Himawari smiles and agrees.
After this scene, Kohane’s arc begins and Himawari disappears for twenty-something chapters. Doumeki and Watanuki work to protect and help Kohane, who is trying to help her mother as best she can. Watanuki puts himself in harms way in order to protect Kohane, and after everything is said and done and Kohane is safe, Doumeki asks him why he was so reckless. Watanuki admits that he trusted Doumeki to make sure nothing bad happened.
When Himawari does appear again, she’s back to her usual stance: laughing at the silliness between Doumeki and Watanuki. Her insecurities haven’t disappeared completely, despite the reassurances that the two care about her. Watanuki invites her to have cake, and she goes through several emotions before telling him she’s “looking forward to it” and inviting Doumeki along.
The Pairing
Why it Works
To me, the three of them together in a pairing is something that’s natural and necessary. The three of them complete one another, and ground one another. The problem I see with monogamous pairings between the three is that it somehow excludes another. Doumeki/Watanuki excludes and downplays Himawari’s importance. Watanuki/Himawari brushes off the subtext between Doumeki and Watanuki (which is there.) And Doumeki/Himawari doesn’t… actually exist in fandom (even though I ship it a lot, uh...)
The thing is, Watanuki loves and cares for both of them dearly. He’s admitted to loving Himawari, to wanting to see her smile, and his fawning over her persists even after knowing about her curse. He adores her and wants to see her happy. But, in addition, he has undergone great changes in his relationship to Doumeki. They started out hating each other, and while Watanuki is quick to snap out at Doumeki, he’s admitted to trusting him. He cares for both of them. And they, in turn, care for him, too.
Doumeki has done a lot for Watanuki, and Watanuki for Doumeki. I couldn’t go into extreme details in this manifesto, as I tried to focus on moments between the three of them, but at the very least Doumeki has an extremely important role in protecting and watching over Watanuki. Kohane told him to take care of Watanuki. Yuuko gave Doumeki an egg to hold onto the promise day so that the “last moment won’t be the last.” Doumeki originally was around Watanuki because he helped dispel the evil spirits trying to hurt him. He looks after and protects Watanuki, much to the latter’s chagrin. Because I couldn’t go into detail about it, I direct you towards the Doumeki/Watanuki manifesto written by aishuu, which covers a good portion of their relationship and sacrifices for one another (though it isn’t up to date with current canon, as it was written a few years ago.)
Doumeki cares about Watanuki, and even if Watanuki is loath to admit it, he cares about Doumeki, as well. At the very least, he trusts him. They have plenty of subtext to be a pairing and to love one another. They’ve undergone a lot of development from the earlier volumes to current canon. They trust one another, enough now that Watanuki can admit to Doumeki the things that bother and burden him.
But Himawari is also just as important to Watanuki. He loves her, he fawns over her, and he adores her. Despite knowing that she’s bad luck, despite knowing that he would bring him misfortune and could kill him, he doesn’t care because he loves her. He promised he wouldn’t die, and he genuinely wants to live now… and being happy means being with her. She, too, loves and cares about him. If anyone says otherwise, they need to reread volume 10. A girl doesn’t take someone’s scars unless she truly cares about them, especially in a culture like Japan where scars can permanently destroy a girl’s chances of being considered “beautiful” or getting married (not that the latter was ever on the table in Himawari’s mind, I think is fair to say.) If she didn’t love him, she wouldn’t have cried from sheer relief for him being alive, and for him being happy to have met her. No one has ever said that to her before, and she is touched by it.
The relationship between Doumeki and Himawari is unexplored and underdeveloped. xxxHOLiC takes place from Watanuki’s point of view, so it’s to be expected that the relationship and canon interaction would take place in or around Watanuki. But in the moments they have together, it’s clear that they care about one another and have a mutual respect for one another. Before volume 10, the two of them are cordial to one another, and on friendly terms. Himawari has helped Doumeki with school work or with serving drinks, and talked together about Watanuki. After volume 10, Himawari expects Doumeki to push her away, too, but he merely insists on the three of them staying together. He, like Watanuki, doesn’t let Himawari get too far away. And with Doumeki neutralizing her bad luck, in a sense, the three of them can be together without having to worry about Watanuki falling out a window again.
It’s clear that both Doumeki and Himawari love Watanuki, and that he loves them.
Because they love each other, whether platonically or non-platonically, they will stay together. They want to stay together. Doumeki and Watanuki refuse to let Himawari to get away. Doumeki and Himawari refuse to let Watanuki disappear. Watanuki and Himawari rely on Doumeki for his stability and because he is unaffected by Himawari’s curse due to his pure aura (Yuuko said that Tanpopo would not be affected by Himawari's curse "like Doumeki", so the extent to which Doumeki is unaffected and/or neutralizes Himawari's curse is mostly speculation at this point rooted in canon at least on some level.) They complete one another.
Fandom
Their compatibility is one of the main reasons why I myself ship them. When I first got into fandom and read xxxHOLiC, I was a Dou/Wata shipper. As I went further in the series, however, I fell in love with Himawari and the dynamic between the three of them. Now, I can’t appreciate Dou/Wata like I used to, because it just feels empty without Himawari. To me, they were made for one another, and complete one another. Whether platonic or shippy, I love them together.
The main, popular pairing in xxxHOLiC fandom is, without a doubt, Doumeki/Watanuki. Fics of them are the most prominent and their pairing comm is very active. When Himawari’s featured in these stories, which is rarely more than a mention, it’s for her to be there to fangirl them, as is the fate of many female characters in fandom. Slight fandom bias aside, the amount of fic featuring the OT3 in a non-platonic sense (or even platonic) are few and far between. But the ones out there are wonderful reads and I adore every single one. If I could, I’d list them all for you to enjoy, but as that would be tedious and this is supposed to be an introduction to the pairing and not a hardcore delve, I’ll list some of my personal favorites.
Fanfiction:
Deep as the Wine-Dark Sea by allira_dream: There are no words for how beautifully written this piece is.
Chrysallis by vicious_lullaby: This writer has quite a few fic for the OT3, but this one is so poignant and lovely it nearly makes you cry. I… just wish I could list every single fic this writer has written for the OT3. I love them all so, so much. In fact, have the OT3 tag!
Silence in the Presence of Contentment by doumeki: Sweet and lovely fic about Watanuki’s birthday; she’s written a few others featuring the OT3 and I highly recommend all of them.
Other:
You Know I Love You So: A Doumeki/Watanuki/Himawari FST by Buddha_loves_me: Yeah, I feel lame doing a self-post in my own manifesto, but whatever.
Wings Made of Wishes: A Doumeki/Watanuki/Himawari FST by epicureal: another great FST with such pretty songs that fit the three of them perfectly!
Communities:
xxx_holic: General xxxHOLiC community
chiffon_cake: Community dedicated to the OT3
holic_ot3: Community dedicated to any threesome in xxxHOLiC
holic_girls: Community dedicated to all the holic girls, with no boys allowed (unless accompanied by a female escort~!) There are a few OT3 fics listed