You've Got To Be Kidding Me - Final Notes
I started writing 'You've Got To Be Kidding Me' when I was at a very low point in my life. And in my mind, I would not be able to truly rise above that until I had completed this story. However, at the same time this story also represented something beautiful. If I had never started writing 'You've Got To Be Kidding Me,' then I never would have met one of the most beautiful people in my life. So at the same time that my personal struggle was pushing me to complete the story, my mind was also worried that finishing this would take away the one thing that had brought her and I together. I think that is one of the reasons that it took me so long to complete this.
But I have to admit that I was somewhat shocked by the response that I received when I posted the last chapter. It seemed that most of the people who commented on the last chapter, commented to tell me that they either did not understand the ending or that they could not accept the way the story had ended.
When I wrote the very last word of the very last chapter, the last line made me smile -- not because I'm hopelessly in love with unhappy endings, but because this was the first story that I had in so long that actually ended with a happy ending.
If you believe that 'You've Got To Be Kidding Me' ended on a sad note, then -- in a way -- you are correct. The ending was very bittersweet. There was not a single character in the last chapter that was not hurting at one point or another, but the very last line was what gave the bitter chapter a sweeter taste.
After the story changes to 3rd person, it is revealed that Pete and Patrick had a very tough time coming to an agreement over Lewis and how the 'Lewis Issue' should be handled. Pete believed that if Lewis was raised to address Patrick as his father, that one day someone outside of their group was bound to overhear. And it was this stubbornness that eventually drove Patrick and Pete apart. Patrick loved Pete -- he always loved Pete -- but at the same time he hated him for denying him the right to love his son as his son. They fought over this issue, and eventually the fighting and bitterness between them grew to such an extent that Patrick could not take being in the same house as Pete. Even though he loved Pete and Lewis dearly, his hatred of what Pete had denied him caused simply looking at Pete to hurt.
But he never deserted his child. Even though Pete's fear of discovery caused him to push Patrick away more and more as time progressed, Patrick was always around, he was always watching. He staid as close to Lewis as he could. But he was afraid that he would lose Pete forever if he approached Lewis and told him the truth. At least by keeping the painful secret, he could watch Lewis and keep his hope of everything one day coming together and fixing itself.
At the same time that Patrick was struggling to live without Pete and Lewis, Pete was struggling to live without Patrick. Staying away from each other was slowly killing both of them, but Pete refused to admit that he was wrong. He refused to admit out loud that he needed Patrick.
In order to cope, Pete turned to alcohol and surrounding himself with 'fake friends'. His dreams slowly faded away and he stopped writing his problems and his future on the fog of the bathroom window. While -- in order to deal with the same separation -- Patrick went into reclusion and gave up music.
In the last line, when Lewis acknowledges Patrick as his 'mother' for the first time, Pete allows him to. He, "did not protest."
To me that was a happy ending. It showed that Pete had stopped fighting himself and had finally given in. He gave up 'his need for secrecy' and admitted to himself that he needed Patrick, and that Patrick needed him and Lewis in order to be happy.
I loved the last line because it leaves it open to the reader to read into it what they wish. If they want to believe that even though Pete finally let Lewis and Patrick be together, yet never worked out his own problems with Patrick, then you are free to do that.
Not everything can end in butterflies and flowers.
But if you crave a happy ending, take my word for it. Embrace and accept the fact that -- even though they suffered through so many years of hardships and misfortune -- at the end Pete and Patrick were once again together. They once again completed one another.
Once again, I would like to thank each and every one of you who stuck with me over the past year and a half. It was because of all of your kind words and encouragement that I never gave up on 'You've Got To Be Kidding Me' or myself.
Each and every one of you gained more and more of my love each and every time you brought a smile to my face.
Much Love,
~Shin
Warning: Do NOT read this until you have read the last chapter of 'You've Got To Be Kidding Me.' This is an explanation of the final chapter. If you have not read it, this will ruin the ending completely.
But I have to admit that I was somewhat shocked by the response that I received when I posted the last chapter. It seemed that most of the people who commented on the last chapter, commented to tell me that they either did not understand the ending or that they could not accept the way the story had ended.
When I wrote the very last word of the very last chapter, the last line made me smile -- not because I'm hopelessly in love with unhappy endings, but because this was the first story that I had in so long that actually ended with a happy ending.
If you believe that 'You've Got To Be Kidding Me' ended on a sad note, then -- in a way -- you are correct. The ending was very bittersweet. There was not a single character in the last chapter that was not hurting at one point or another, but the very last line was what gave the bitter chapter a sweeter taste.
After the story changes to 3rd person, it is revealed that Pete and Patrick had a very tough time coming to an agreement over Lewis and how the 'Lewis Issue' should be handled. Pete believed that if Lewis was raised to address Patrick as his father, that one day someone outside of their group was bound to overhear. And it was this stubbornness that eventually drove Patrick and Pete apart. Patrick loved Pete -- he always loved Pete -- but at the same time he hated him for denying him the right to love his son as his son. They fought over this issue, and eventually the fighting and bitterness between them grew to such an extent that Patrick could not take being in the same house as Pete. Even though he loved Pete and Lewis dearly, his hatred of what Pete had denied him caused simply looking at Pete to hurt.
But he never deserted his child. Even though Pete's fear of discovery caused him to push Patrick away more and more as time progressed, Patrick was always around, he was always watching. He staid as close to Lewis as he could. But he was afraid that he would lose Pete forever if he approached Lewis and told him the truth. At least by keeping the painful secret, he could watch Lewis and keep his hope of everything one day coming together and fixing itself.
At the same time that Patrick was struggling to live without Pete and Lewis, Pete was struggling to live without Patrick. Staying away from each other was slowly killing both of them, but Pete refused to admit that he was wrong. He refused to admit out loud that he needed Patrick.
In order to cope, Pete turned to alcohol and surrounding himself with 'fake friends'. His dreams slowly faded away and he stopped writing his problems and his future on the fog of the bathroom window. While -- in order to deal with the same separation -- Patrick went into reclusion and gave up music.
In the last line, when Lewis acknowledges Patrick as his 'mother' for the first time, Pete allows him to. He, "did not protest."
To me that was a happy ending. It showed that Pete had stopped fighting himself and had finally given in. He gave up 'his need for secrecy' and admitted to himself that he needed Patrick, and that Patrick needed him and Lewis in order to be happy.
I loved the last line because it leaves it open to the reader to read into it what they wish. If they want to believe that even though Pete finally let Lewis and Patrick be together, yet never worked out his own problems with Patrick, then you are free to do that.
Not everything can end in butterflies and flowers.
But if you crave a happy ending, take my word for it. Embrace and accept the fact that -- even though they suffered through so many years of hardships and misfortune -- at the end Pete and Patrick were once again together. They once again completed one another.
Once again, I would like to thank each and every one of you who stuck with me over the past year and a half. It was because of all of your kind words and encouragement that I never gave up on 'You've Got To Be Kidding Me' or myself.
Each and every one of you gained more and more of my love each and every time you brought a smile to my face.
Much Love,
~Shin
Warning: Do NOT read this until you have read the last chapter of 'You've Got To Be Kidding Me.' This is an explanation of the final chapter. If you have not read it, this will ruin the ending completely.