Frustration Anyone?
I don't remember where I heard this saying, but it is a good one; there are three kinds of intercourse: 'making love,' 'sex,' and 'fucking.' For different people these can mean different things. As an example, making love for a hippie is the physical manifestation of their love for another, whereas making love for a redneck is their physical manifestation of thinking with the wrong organ at the closest thing with something similar to a reproductive organ. To me these represent different methods for emotional construction. Think of it this way; if a builder from MN started building a house in CA they would quickly find the tornado-proof house would come tumbling down when the first earthquake hits. When they see the problem occurring, they will change designs to accommodate the area. For the sake of simplicity, I am going to stick with heterosexual sex descriptions (mainly because I don't know anything about non-hetero sex (the real stuff, not the cheap porno version)). The three versions of sexual intercourse have different meanings in society's different niches, but this is how I see it.
Making Love. Not may people hear this term anymore. Honestly, it does sound quite corny and cliche. When was the last time you looked into the eyes of your partner and put all your heart and soul into the three words, "Let's make love." Now, that is not to say it doesn't happen and that there isn't a time and mood for verbiage like that, but the vast majority of the medically-healthy-enough-for-sex are never going to use that phrase in their lives and if they do their significant other will either laugh at them or soon leave them. I kinda find that to be disheartening. I, being a hopeless romantic, am entranced by the idea that you can love somebody so much that you need to go past the verbal and go into such physical displays of love. Most people in their lives are going to find somebody they want to spend the rest of the time they have left with somebody who means something to them. Does that mean they found their love? What about when they get divorced, widowed or get bored? What about the other people who don't find a person they want to spend their lives with? Is that going to make them stop having sex? Fuck no!
Something you have probably heard at some point in your lives, "Sex is hereditary: if your parents didn't do it, chances are you wont either." This phrase probably made you throw up a little in the back of your mouth. The sheer thought of your parents going at it was probably horrifying. It may still be horrifying. But it also gave you a little bit of curiosity about sex. You hear all of your life that you need to wait for marriage to have sex from your 'role models,' but the role model your parents sat you in front of every day made sex out to be a trendy thing. This role model taught all of us that sex doesn't need to have any strings attached. There is no need to see the person you had sex with last night the morning after. They were probably cheating on their significant other with you. Same as you, right? Fuck sanctity in marriage! With divorce rates climbing all the time, it is obvious people don't hold marriage in the same esteem they used to. Why should sex be held to the old standard when the whole reason you were 'saving yourself' was for an institution that doesn't have the symbolism it once had. This, together with other reasons, are why many people believe there is such a thing as 'casual sex.' The concept that you can put a man and woman together, have the mail insert into and retract his penis from the woman several times over, along with other interesting actions with none of the emotional baggage. A dream come true for many men and women alike. Why not satisfy the urge without conforming to the old societal standard? Why not take it a step further and go back to your base desires? That's easy: the new social standard. Hmph. But what if that changed?
Something the teens and young adults, with their angst swimming in hormones, have thought to no end, "I just wanna fuck somebody!" Resulting from extreme sexual tension and frustration these people almost turn feral, while they are fighting the urge to break society's rules and fulfill the instinctual need to procreate, and turn to each other to alleviate the 'pressure.' In this, there is no love. There is no curiosity. There is only that last piece of their young, newly developed mind that has not be molded into the current human society. This is not to say only young people do this. There are plenty of people who want to 'just fuck,' that are older than them. And why not? When a person has no outlet for their pent up sexual energy it turns to frustration and as *most* everybody knows: masturbation doesn't solve that problem for ever. No matter what the box says, it is not going to be better than the real thing. The thing that sets the young population apart from the rest in this category is they will try new things since they still have the teen angst in them. They are compelled to challenge society at all costs and that will lead to fetishes given birth by the objects of their frustrations. Next time you feel the need to judge you should think about what made the person/people want to do what they are doing. Matt, you should watch the final boss of the internet again and try to think about what would make those people do what they did (while laughing/vomiting).
Most people will go through at least two of these desires. You can start in any of the three. You can start with making love when you have found your Mr(s) right at an early age. Fucking is a starting ground for those who have idle hands where the curious social-sexualites had enough on their plate to keep them busy without stressing them excessively. From each starting ground you will experiment and find you are either meant for that method of sexual relief or that your weather-proof house is collapsing due to an earthquake and move on to find your best position in the sexual world. Just like with anything else, your best bet for making the most of yourself for yourself and others is finding what you are good at and building on that stable ground. Many people will have their opinions on the sexual excursions a person can take. People will say some are bad and others are good. I wouldn't say any of them are inherently bad, but if you take any one of them too far or go into a situation without knowing all of the facts you will end up hurting yourself and/or somebody else. Above all else, the thing you have to remember is: do what makes you happy.
For the record, this is not a Heart Candy Day rant. People should just know I like to talk about random stuff when I am hyper late at night.
Making Love. Not may people hear this term anymore. Honestly, it does sound quite corny and cliche. When was the last time you looked into the eyes of your partner and put all your heart and soul into the three words, "Let's make love." Now, that is not to say it doesn't happen and that there isn't a time and mood for verbiage like that, but the vast majority of the medically-healthy-enough-for-sex are never going to use that phrase in their lives and if they do their significant other will either laugh at them or soon leave them. I kinda find that to be disheartening. I, being a hopeless romantic, am entranced by the idea that you can love somebody so much that you need to go past the verbal and go into such physical displays of love. Most people in their lives are going to find somebody they want to spend the rest of the time they have left with somebody who means something to them. Does that mean they found their love? What about when they get divorced, widowed or get bored? What about the other people who don't find a person they want to spend their lives with? Is that going to make them stop having sex? Fuck no!
Something you have probably heard at some point in your lives, "Sex is hereditary: if your parents didn't do it, chances are you wont either." This phrase probably made you throw up a little in the back of your mouth. The sheer thought of your parents going at it was probably horrifying. It may still be horrifying. But it also gave you a little bit of curiosity about sex. You hear all of your life that you need to wait for marriage to have sex from your 'role models,' but the role model your parents sat you in front of every day made sex out to be a trendy thing. This role model taught all of us that sex doesn't need to have any strings attached. There is no need to see the person you had sex with last night the morning after. They were probably cheating on their significant other with you. Same as you, right? Fuck sanctity in marriage! With divorce rates climbing all the time, it is obvious people don't hold marriage in the same esteem they used to. Why should sex be held to the old standard when the whole reason you were 'saving yourself' was for an institution that doesn't have the symbolism it once had. This, together with other reasons, are why many people believe there is such a thing as 'casual sex.' The concept that you can put a man and woman together, have the mail insert into and retract his penis from the woman several times over, along with other interesting actions with none of the emotional baggage. A dream come true for many men and women alike. Why not satisfy the urge without conforming to the old societal standard? Why not take it a step further and go back to your base desires? That's easy: the new social standard. Hmph. But what if that changed?
Something the teens and young adults, with their angst swimming in hormones, have thought to no end, "I just wanna fuck somebody!" Resulting from extreme sexual tension and frustration these people almost turn feral, while they are fighting the urge to break society's rules and fulfill the instinctual need to procreate, and turn to each other to alleviate the 'pressure.' In this, there is no love. There is no curiosity. There is only that last piece of their young, newly developed mind that has not be molded into the current human society. This is not to say only young people do this. There are plenty of people who want to 'just fuck,' that are older than them. And why not? When a person has no outlet for their pent up sexual energy it turns to frustration and as *most* everybody knows: masturbation doesn't solve that problem for ever. No matter what the box says, it is not going to be better than the real thing. The thing that sets the young population apart from the rest in this category is they will try new things since they still have the teen angst in them. They are compelled to challenge society at all costs and that will lead to fetishes given birth by the objects of their frustrations. Next time you feel the need to judge you should think about what made the person/people want to do what they are doing. Matt, you should watch the final boss of the internet again and try to think about what would make those people do what they did (while laughing/vomiting).
Most people will go through at least two of these desires. You can start in any of the three. You can start with making love when you have found your Mr(s) right at an early age. Fucking is a starting ground for those who have idle hands where the curious social-sexualites had enough on their plate to keep them busy without stressing them excessively. From each starting ground you will experiment and find you are either meant for that method of sexual relief or that your weather-proof house is collapsing due to an earthquake and move on to find your best position in the sexual world. Just like with anything else, your best bet for making the most of yourself for yourself and others is finding what you are good at and building on that stable ground. Many people will have their opinions on the sexual excursions a person can take. People will say some are bad and others are good. I wouldn't say any of them are inherently bad, but if you take any one of them too far or go into a situation without knowing all of the facts you will end up hurting yourself and/or somebody else. Above all else, the thing you have to remember is: do what makes you happy.
For the record, this is not a Heart Candy Day rant. People should just know I like to talk about random stuff when I am hyper late at night.