random ramblings
Today has actually been really hard. I went into uni in surrey which meant getting on the train and stuff as it was my other uni. journry was ok, but really slow and the train was late getting in so i had to like practically run the 20min walk uphill to the uni as i had a meeting which i couldnt miss
it was a meeting with my tutor who i havent seen at all this year. it was just really unlucky that the 1 time i was actually free and he had a spare half hour that i was ill and feeling rough and had to go home so i never go to see him. but i saw him today. he was really nice, he knew about the problems i had this year as my course organiser had told him and stuff so it was good to not have to explain everything again. I knew my course organiser was going to tell him as he had said he was when i saw him last feb, so that was fine. it was all confidential anyway. he just asked me how i was getting on and stuff and what i was doing next year and what i was planning on doing for my dissertation
he was actually really interested in my dissertation as he has done work out in china before so thought it sounded good.
it was just really nice to have someone on my side, i very rarely have that nowadays so it was just really calming.
i then went and annoyed a few people and then when they were fed up of me disturbing their internet searching i managed to convince them to come for a drink. so we went to the union and had a coffee. i then came home and chatted to my flatmates. thy then dragged me to the pub for a drink but i left early because im knackered.
i think im beginning to deal with the cfs in that i can manage it a bit. i know when i reach my limit of awakeness and know what precautions i have to take... like if i have a busy day i make sure i get the bus all the way to uni rather than walking the 20walk which will knacker me.
the one thing i do need to do though is to tell my family. i dont want to though because i know they wont believe me. they think im far to moany and stuff and i dont want to upset them, i cant deal with that. i also cant deal with the looks of disappointment and disbelief, like im lying... ill do it one day, just not yet.
the other thing i need to do is speak to my dissertation supervisor. he is a great guy and we get on well so idont want to spoil that friednship. i think he will be supportive infact, im sure he will, i just dont want him to feel he needs to treat me differently... i dont know.
urgh iim rambling.. night! <3
it was a meeting with my tutor who i havent seen at all this year. it was just really unlucky that the 1 time i was actually free and he had a spare half hour that i was ill and feeling rough and had to go home so i never go to see him. but i saw him today. he was really nice, he knew about the problems i had this year as my course organiser had told him and stuff so it was good to not have to explain everything again. I knew my course organiser was going to tell him as he had said he was when i saw him last feb, so that was fine. it was all confidential anyway. he just asked me how i was getting on and stuff and what i was doing next year and what i was planning on doing for my dissertation
he was actually really interested in my dissertation as he has done work out in china before so thought it sounded good.
it was just really nice to have someone on my side, i very rarely have that nowadays so it was just really calming.
i then went and annoyed a few people and then when they were fed up of me disturbing their internet searching i managed to convince them to come for a drink. so we went to the union and had a coffee. i then came home and chatted to my flatmates. thy then dragged me to the pub for a drink but i left early because im knackered.
i think im beginning to deal with the cfs in that i can manage it a bit. i know when i reach my limit of awakeness and know what precautions i have to take... like if i have a busy day i make sure i get the bus all the way to uni rather than walking the 20walk which will knacker me.
the one thing i do need to do though is to tell my family. i dont want to though because i know they wont believe me. they think im far to moany and stuff and i dont want to upset them, i cant deal with that. i also cant deal with the looks of disappointment and disbelief, like im lying... ill do it one day, just not yet.
the other thing i need to do is speak to my dissertation supervisor. he is a great guy and we get on well so idont want to spoil that friednship. i think he will be supportive infact, im sure he will, i just dont want him to feel he needs to treat me differently... i dont know.
urgh iim rambling.. night! <3