SHINee Secret Santa - Option Three
To: lazychaos
From: Your Secret Santa!
Title: Option Three
Pairing: Jonghyun/Onew
Rating: PG-13
Summary: In which jonghyun is an unwilling man in black. sort of.
Jonghyun dies on a cold rainy night, crossing the street from his apartment to the grocery store. It’s possibly the most anticlimactic thing ever, and to make matters worse Jonghyun doesn’t even remember dying-although, as he watches the scene below him unfold, he’s guessing a car hit him. How embarrassing, he thinks, his death is just as much of a letdown as his entire life.
He takes to making suggestive faces at random strangers before he feels a cold tap on his shoulder. Jonghyun jumps, and turns around to see another boy beaming at him. Or, that’s what it looks like. “Kim Jonghyun?” He says, still smiling like a fool.
“Can I help you?” Jonghyun whispers, just to test if the boy can see him.
“No, I’m here to help you,” he says with a wink. “I’m Jinki, I’m your guide to the Underworld.”
“Oh,” Jonghyun panics. “I’m not going to Hell, am I?”
“Good question!” Jinki keeps smiling at him and Jonghyun has no idea why (frankly, he’s beginning to worry that Jinki’s a bit crazy). He holds out a hand. “Grab on and I’ll tell you more.”
Jonghyun studies his face. “How do I know you’re not some crazy malevolent spirit.” Jinki deadpans and grabs his hand, shooting up into the sky. “Hey, what do you think you’re-“
“You’re being ridiculous,” Jinki says, frowning at him. The world shifts below them into a place Jonghyun doesn’t recognize. “You see, according to Underworld records, you’re supposed to die on May 16th, 2055, which certainly isn’t anytime soon. Due to your general study habits, like, uh, no eating or leaving the apartment after nine, we didn’t project that you’d go outside tonight. So…basically, um…the Underworld doesn’t have a place for you yet.” Jinki laughs nervously.
Jonghyun blinks. “I don’t get it,” he says. “How can the Underworld fuck up like that?”
“It happens,” Jinki says with a defensive shrug. “People are reckless and end up dying before their time. We try to fix it, but people aren’t always willing.” He sighs, finally stopping on firm land. A giant manor lies before them, and Jonghyun’s intimidated by the huge gold doors alone. “Anyway, Jonghyun, you have three options.”
“For what?”
“Getting your life back,” he says, as if it’s obvious.
“Oh,” Jonghyun scratches his neck. “And they are…”
Jinki smiles wide again. “The first is you can get a living person to kiss your corpse. But the chances of that happening are, uh, as you can imagine, slim to none these days.” He knocks on one of the huge doors, shrinking as if he’s intimidated himself. “Another thing you can do is be reincarnated into a body and standard of living extremely similar to yours, but that takes time and doesn’t get you the same life.” The doors open in front of them. “And the last option is the one almost nobody takes.”
Jonghyun’s face falls. “So it’s worse.”
“Actually, it’s not,” Jinki says, leading him inside the manor. “You get put back in your body right away, as soon as you agree to it. The catch is that you work for the Underworld, finding lost spirits and making sure demons stay out of the human realm. You can’t tell anyone what you’re doing, and you can’t let anyone see you. It’s dangerous, and it’s hard work, but you’d get to see me every day. And pretend that you’re the Men in Black.” He flashes another playful smile. “I’ll even call you J if you want.”
He frowns. “Are all guides as happy as you?”
Jinki laughs like church bells. “Please,” he says. “Kibum hates this job.” He leads Jonghyun into a tiny room, closing the door behind them. Jinki suddenly seems a bit more serious. “So, do you know what you’re going to do?”
“How long do I have?”
“Not long,” he admits. “If you drag on your time here, we’ll have to mess with the space-time continuum to keep this from normal humans. No one believes in magic kisses, and once word about your death spreads it’s hard to reverse without divine intervention. And finding a good match for reincarnation is difficult, so the sooner the better.”
Jonghyun sighs. Kissing is out of the question, since the only person he can think of agreeing to that is Minho, and that’s just gross. Reincarnation, on the other hand, sounds good-he could start over, make the right decisions, maybe even get into all those choirs this time. He thinks of seeing Minho and Taemin in his new body, though, remembering them but not being able to approach them, and shivers. He’s come too far; he can’t give up his own life.
He gulps. “I’ll take the third option,” he says, and Jinki’s face lights up in an instant.
“You’ll start after we give you a little adjusting time,” he says. “I’ll be your partner.”
Jonghyun takes slow, deep breaths and tells himself he’ll just claim amnesia once he’s alive. It’ll work.
--
Seven mornings later, Jonghyun wakes up to excited singing. He buries his face in his pillow, covering the back of his head with blankets. “It’s too early for this, Taemin,” he moans.
He feels the blanket pulled off him against his will, and opens one eye to see Jinki beaming and thrusting a cinnamon roll at his mouth. “Eat this,” he says, “And then I have to teach you how to fight demons.”
Jonghyun musters all his energy to raise an eyebrow. Amnesia, Jonghyun, you have amnesia. “I-I’m sorry, but who are you?” he asks, and winces when it’s not as convincing as he’d like.
Jinki glares. “Don’t do this,” he says, setting the cinnamon roll next to his nose. “I know you remember me. Now get out of bed, I don’t want any demons killing you because you wouldn’t listen to me.”
“Mmph,” Jonghyun says. Fuck my life, he thinks.
“I told you this would be hard, didn’t I?” Jinki pouts and grabs Jonghyun’s legs, pulling him off the bed. “Look, will it make you feel better if I say I bought you a nice suit to wear on the job? Oh, and Pluto gave me some really cool guns, do you want to see?”
“I’m going to die,” Jonghyun wails as he falls on the floor. “Again,”
“Nonsense,” Jinki says. “I won’t let you. Promise.” He turns around and trips over one of Jonghyun’s math textbooks, and Jonghyun realizes that they are possibly the two least qualified people to defend the world from evil. He wonders if it would have been so much just to resurrect him without all these strings.
“You don’t seem very qualified,” he mutters, reaching up for the cinnamon roll. “Do you even know how to use those guns?”
“Trust me,” he says soberly. “We’re going to be the best team ever.” His smile is so innocent that Jonghyun almost laughs, and for a minute he thinks he might not regret this after all, if only because he gets to see that every day.
He reserves judgement until he sees a demon.
From: Your Secret Santa!
Title: Option Three
Pairing: Jonghyun/Onew
Rating: PG-13
Summary: In which jonghyun is an unwilling man in black. sort of.
Jonghyun dies on a cold rainy night, crossing the street from his apartment to the grocery store. It’s possibly the most anticlimactic thing ever, and to make matters worse Jonghyun doesn’t even remember dying-although, as he watches the scene below him unfold, he’s guessing a car hit him. How embarrassing, he thinks, his death is just as much of a letdown as his entire life.
He takes to making suggestive faces at random strangers before he feels a cold tap on his shoulder. Jonghyun jumps, and turns around to see another boy beaming at him. Or, that’s what it looks like. “Kim Jonghyun?” He says, still smiling like a fool.
“Can I help you?” Jonghyun whispers, just to test if the boy can see him.
“No, I’m here to help you,” he says with a wink. “I’m Jinki, I’m your guide to the Underworld.”
“Oh,” Jonghyun panics. “I’m not going to Hell, am I?”
“Good question!” Jinki keeps smiling at him and Jonghyun has no idea why (frankly, he’s beginning to worry that Jinki’s a bit crazy). He holds out a hand. “Grab on and I’ll tell you more.”
Jonghyun studies his face. “How do I know you’re not some crazy malevolent spirit.” Jinki deadpans and grabs his hand, shooting up into the sky. “Hey, what do you think you’re-“
“You’re being ridiculous,” Jinki says, frowning at him. The world shifts below them into a place Jonghyun doesn’t recognize. “You see, according to Underworld records, you’re supposed to die on May 16th, 2055, which certainly isn’t anytime soon. Due to your general study habits, like, uh, no eating or leaving the apartment after nine, we didn’t project that you’d go outside tonight. So…basically, um…the Underworld doesn’t have a place for you yet.” Jinki laughs nervously.
Jonghyun blinks. “I don’t get it,” he says. “How can the Underworld fuck up like that?”
“It happens,” Jinki says with a defensive shrug. “People are reckless and end up dying before their time. We try to fix it, but people aren’t always willing.” He sighs, finally stopping on firm land. A giant manor lies before them, and Jonghyun’s intimidated by the huge gold doors alone. “Anyway, Jonghyun, you have three options.”
“For what?”
“Getting your life back,” he says, as if it’s obvious.
“Oh,” Jonghyun scratches his neck. “And they are…”
Jinki smiles wide again. “The first is you can get a living person to kiss your corpse. But the chances of that happening are, uh, as you can imagine, slim to none these days.” He knocks on one of the huge doors, shrinking as if he’s intimidated himself. “Another thing you can do is be reincarnated into a body and standard of living extremely similar to yours, but that takes time and doesn’t get you the same life.” The doors open in front of them. “And the last option is the one almost nobody takes.”
Jonghyun’s face falls. “So it’s worse.”
“Actually, it’s not,” Jinki says, leading him inside the manor. “You get put back in your body right away, as soon as you agree to it. The catch is that you work for the Underworld, finding lost spirits and making sure demons stay out of the human realm. You can’t tell anyone what you’re doing, and you can’t let anyone see you. It’s dangerous, and it’s hard work, but you’d get to see me every day. And pretend that you’re the Men in Black.” He flashes another playful smile. “I’ll even call you J if you want.”
He frowns. “Are all guides as happy as you?”
Jinki laughs like church bells. “Please,” he says. “Kibum hates this job.” He leads Jonghyun into a tiny room, closing the door behind them. Jinki suddenly seems a bit more serious. “So, do you know what you’re going to do?”
“How long do I have?”
“Not long,” he admits. “If you drag on your time here, we’ll have to mess with the space-time continuum to keep this from normal humans. No one believes in magic kisses, and once word about your death spreads it’s hard to reverse without divine intervention. And finding a good match for reincarnation is difficult, so the sooner the better.”
Jonghyun sighs. Kissing is out of the question, since the only person he can think of agreeing to that is Minho, and that’s just gross. Reincarnation, on the other hand, sounds good-he could start over, make the right decisions, maybe even get into all those choirs this time. He thinks of seeing Minho and Taemin in his new body, though, remembering them but not being able to approach them, and shivers. He’s come too far; he can’t give up his own life.
He gulps. “I’ll take the third option,” he says, and Jinki’s face lights up in an instant.
“You’ll start after we give you a little adjusting time,” he says. “I’ll be your partner.”
Jonghyun takes slow, deep breaths and tells himself he’ll just claim amnesia once he’s alive. It’ll work.
--
Seven mornings later, Jonghyun wakes up to excited singing. He buries his face in his pillow, covering the back of his head with blankets. “It’s too early for this, Taemin,” he moans.
He feels the blanket pulled off him against his will, and opens one eye to see Jinki beaming and thrusting a cinnamon roll at his mouth. “Eat this,” he says, “And then I have to teach you how to fight demons.”
Jonghyun musters all his energy to raise an eyebrow. Amnesia, Jonghyun, you have amnesia. “I-I’m sorry, but who are you?” he asks, and winces when it’s not as convincing as he’d like.
Jinki glares. “Don’t do this,” he says, setting the cinnamon roll next to his nose. “I know you remember me. Now get out of bed, I don’t want any demons killing you because you wouldn’t listen to me.”
“Mmph,” Jonghyun says. Fuck my life, he thinks.
“I told you this would be hard, didn’t I?” Jinki pouts and grabs Jonghyun’s legs, pulling him off the bed. “Look, will it make you feel better if I say I bought you a nice suit to wear on the job? Oh, and Pluto gave me some really cool guns, do you want to see?”
“I’m going to die,” Jonghyun wails as he falls on the floor. “Again,”
“Nonsense,” Jinki says. “I won’t let you. Promise.” He turns around and trips over one of Jonghyun’s math textbooks, and Jonghyun realizes that they are possibly the two least qualified people to defend the world from evil. He wonders if it would have been so much just to resurrect him without all these strings.
“You don’t seem very qualified,” he mutters, reaching up for the cinnamon roll. “Do you even know how to use those guns?”
“Trust me,” he says soberly. “We’re going to be the best team ever.” His smile is so innocent that Jonghyun almost laughs, and for a minute he thinks he might not regret this after all, if only because he gets to see that every day.
He reserves judgement until he sees a demon.