[ic] charloft: Tuesday 11/30

[shilowallace]

from the diary of Shilo Wallace
So STOP READING NOW...that means you, DAD. It's not like I can't tell when the LOCK has been broken!!!

Tell us about a time you teamed up with somebody to do something.Once...well, actually, you know, really, it was two times. Can you say "twice upon a time"? Does that make any sense? I guess I've never really

Comments

[robber_ofgraves]

Hey Shilo. Hate to be rude, but you left this behind your mom's coffin in the tomb yesterday. The lock basically fell off in my hands-- not sure if you were trying to hide it or just forgot it.
Anyway, I left you a new lock, with keys. You can use it if you want.
Lesson One in the GraveRobber school of shit you need to know? When hiding stuff, the more paranoid, the better. Locks are good. Really secret entries could be written in code. And put it somewhere where the cover isn't the only speck of brightness in a grey stone building.

Lesson two in the GraveRobber school of shit you need to know: Chucking hay renders the target stunned for a few seconds, whether it hits them or not. Giving you the chance to prance away. This also applies to trashcans, though I suggest you make sure they're empty or close to before you try-- Chucking hay shouldn't nominate me for superhuman strength, which tells me you need to bulk up a bit.

And Shilo?
I don't like that third time so much either.

Take care kid, see you around.
~Your friendly neighborhood GR.

[shilowallace]

You -! I...this...um. Sorry. I didn't. That...I guess it fell. Out of my bag. And. I didn't. I didn't know it was gone. Um. Thanks? (Now that I'm done blushing?)

Encrypted entries...that's something to think about. ...Even if it is a little too late. Dad used to "accidentally" bust the lock all the time. Stuff written in code...that would have showed him!

...No, you're still a superhero. I can't even pick up a stack of books, let alone a trashcan. I mean, unless you're talking about the little bucket-y looking one I have in my room, but I get the feeling you're not...

Really?

Um...♥. Okay, that's all.

[robber_ofgraves]

Not even a stack of books? Really?
Do me a favor and find something that you can pick up, that's just a bit heavier than you're comfortable with. And start picking it up every time you see it.
And please, kid, whatever you do, don't tell me what it is.

You been keeping yourself fed? You might try some milk, or eggs.

[shilowallace]

...Well. Maybe a stack. Of light books. Not the really heavy textbook kind, though.

The...oh. Never mind, I won't say. You'd probably laugh at me, anyhow.

I guess I'm doing all right. I have milk. I think. How...um. What do I do with the eggs?

[robber_ofgraves]

...you don't know what to do with eggs? You have to cook them, so you can eat them.

You know hat, we may need a Martha Stewart time, but I swear if you tell any of my customers, I'll steal your wig.

But yeah, I'll show you how to make warm food. I'm no heavy duty cook, but at least you'll have some variety in your diet. Out of curiosity, what have you been eating?
Also... do your kitchen appliances even work?

[shilowallace]

Okay, well, I thought so. But. I don't know, I've never cooked eggs before!

What? You can't take that! (...I have other ones, anyway. Hmph.) Who am I really going to tell?

Um. Sandwiches. And these things called granola bars that kind of taste like cardboard. Dad had a ton of them in the pantry, they probably made him feel better about his cooking.

...Yes...? I think?

[robber_ofgraves]

well, you don't drink eggs, usually, so cooking is preferred. But hey, it's okay, we'll work on it. If you're not sure if the stove works, I'll bring matches just in case, and I'm sure we can figure something out.

If he needed cardboard bars to make his food seem palatable, I'm not at all surprised that you've been getting by on sandwiches. Do you know anything you do like? I know a store where they send the stuff that's expired the day before. Still okay to eat, most of it, just... cheaper. We can go together if you want.

[shilowallace]

Well, I mean, it probably works. Dad used it, I'm sure. I just. There are too many knobs.

I...don't know. Peanut butter and sugar is good. I guess I don't really...like food. I just know that everything Dad made tasted...like something was wrong with it. Usually.

You'd really take me?

[robber_ofgraves]

...Peanut butter and SUGAR?
So yeah, we're going to that store before you get diabetes. Put some protein in your diet... maybe even a few almost fresh vegetables.

And of course I'll take you with-- then you'll know where it is, and I won't have to play grocery delivery boy. Plus then you can also learn what is okay to buy and what's not supposed to be that particular shade of green.

Consider it a field trip.

[shilowallace]

What? I...like the way it tastes.

There's such a thing as fresh vegetables? I thought they only came in cans of glop.

Okay!