(no subject)
so I'm glad i finally got a boyfriend and im thankful for that i really am. but what the fuck point is having one when i think ive talked to him for maybe 2 hours in the past three weeks and seen him.. uhh.. not at all.
it's fucking pissing me off.. i get the thing that okay he lives in whitby he cant come here all the time and for the most part i cant go there at all really but okay.. i get that... we cant see each other as often as we'd like.
but fuck.. is it too much to ask for him to just stay home for ONE day in the past three weeks.. for at least a few hours to sit and talk to me on msn or talk to me on the phone.
GAH. I dont care if im being a selfish asshole i dont give a shit im going to be a selfish asshole cause when im starting to wonder if its even worth it i know theres something wrong. and honestly i dont want to think that i never want to think that i always want to think that its worth something at least no matter how small it is, and the only thing i can find in my hours of groping for something is just the thought that i know when i go to sleep someone out there misses me and might might just be thinking about me.
who the fuck knows though
im just sick of the fact that i cant see or talk to the one person i actually fucking can feel like i can show real affection to.
UGH
im going for my fucking G1 >.> not that thats going to help at fucking all for you know.. A YEAR. but thats okay, its hope and right now thats all i have.. that and the aforementioned thought. so might as well take it.
anyway thats enough ranting for now
cause hes messaging me right now
bye whoever bothers reading this
it's fucking pissing me off.. i get the thing that okay he lives in whitby he cant come here all the time and for the most part i cant go there at all really but okay.. i get that... we cant see each other as often as we'd like.
but fuck.. is it too much to ask for him to just stay home for ONE day in the past three weeks.. for at least a few hours to sit and talk to me on msn or talk to me on the phone.
GAH. I dont care if im being a selfish asshole i dont give a shit im going to be a selfish asshole cause when im starting to wonder if its even worth it i know theres something wrong. and honestly i dont want to think that i never want to think that i always want to think that its worth something at least no matter how small it is, and the only thing i can find in my hours of groping for something is just the thought that i know when i go to sleep someone out there misses me and might might just be thinking about me.
who the fuck knows though
im just sick of the fact that i cant see or talk to the one person i actually fucking can feel like i can show real affection to.
UGH
im going for my fucking G1 >.> not that thats going to help at fucking all for you know.. A YEAR. but thats okay, its hope and right now thats all i have.. that and the aforementioned thought. so might as well take it.
anyway thats enough ranting for now
cause hes messaging me right now
bye whoever bothers reading this