What Jack Means - an AU one-shot
What Jack Means
I love the word “Jack”-what it means, how it sounds, the man it embodies. So I’ve been thinking for a while about how to turn this into a story of sorts. Hope you enjoy it.
Rating: NC-17
Thanks to: Em (smiles_a_lot), who gave me the idea for the last paragraph. :)
When Jack thinks back over his life so far, wondering what he’s made of himself, it doesn’t take long for a phrase to come to him. It’s a nickname his mother gave him years ago, when he was still working for his father on the ranch, and doing a damn sight better than the old man would allow. Jack-of-all-trades. He could rope anything, fix anything, grow anything, even ride anything-including the stable hand from two ranches over. After one close call too many, though, Jack thought he’d better cut his losses and look for something new to do.
Jack of hearts. That was the card Jack was sure he’d drawn the day he drove up to Aguirre’s shitty old trailer and saw Ennis Del Mar leaning against the side. Long and lean and fair, Ennis mumbled when he spoke, but stole glances at Jack with rich brown eyes that struck sparks off the heavy granite of his heart. Jack knew he’d read his cards correctly the night that whiskey finally gave him courage, helping him to pull Ennis’s hand down onto the forbidden part of himself. He’d felt the firm squeeze, the gentle caress of fingers against the rough denim of Jack’s fly, before Ennis remembered himself and jerked away. Even in the deed’s rough consummation, Jack savored Ennis’s hands cupping his bare ass and spreading him so carefully, then the strong hand that gripped his in the midst of his own rainbow climax, the thumb stroking along his wrist. The only heart Jack cared about then was Ennis’s.
Ennis just had to get married, though, and he turned away from the open invitation in Jack’s eyes, leaving him with a beat-up truck and a bag of rocks in his stomach. Jack had to become Jack Frost then, pretending not to care, locking in a block of ice where his heart used to be. Seemed like every guy he met after that felt the freeze, too. He’d meet up with them in the back alley behind the bar, in someone’s truck, even once in the bathroom at a party, but after they had banged each other senseless, he pulled on his jeans and left, never looking back. And no one ever once asked him to stay. Until he met Lureen, the fire-red hat on her head the palest ember in comparison to the fire that blazed out of her eyes. He liked her fine, had a good time in the back of her daddy’s fancy car, so when she told him about their problem a month or so later, he figured, why the hell not? And became a daddy and a husband all at one blow. He even loved her, in a way.
For the next several years, Jack had to be Jack-in-the-box, popping up wherever he was needed, on call 24 hours a day, it sometimes seemed, to Lureen and Bobby and also Ennis. No matter what Bobby wanted, Jack was always there, never minding the late-night cries or the doctor’s visits or the evenings he’d spend playing cars and Lincoln Logs on the floor of the living room, while Lureen kept a lonely vigil at the office. Things were a little different with her, however; he was willing to work for her father, drive an endless series of combines that all worked the same way, just dressed up with more bells and whistles, and all the rest-but he couldn’t stomach the bedroom stuff after a while. He could get her off and was generally happy to do it, but there was someone else he’d rather have touching him. No fault of hers, of course, and he remembered that. Especially when he was driving back from his twice-yearly camping trips with Ennis, thinking back on all he wasn’t willing to give him, all the things he already had with Lureen.
Ennis got divorced, and Jack’s life Jackknifed like a semi caught speeding on an icy road. He blew off L. D.’s order to follow a shipment of tractors down to their new owners in El Paso, left Lureen a vaguely worded note on the kitchen counter, threw a duffel bag in the back of his truck, and took off. Fourteen straight hours of driving on nothing but coffee, two greasy hamburgers, and pure hot adrenaline. When he got there, he was even glad to see that Ennis’s daughters were in his truck. After all, they’d be part of his life now, too, wouldn’t they? He couldn’t wait to introduce them to Bobby. Finally they would all have a new road to travel down.
After Jack got back from Riverton, he decided the right thing would be to spend more time with Bobby. Frankly he’d been neglecting him, what with working and going out to the bars and mooning after Ennis Del Whatshisname. Jack dressed Bobby up for Halloween in a tiny jester’s suit, sparkling with green and purple and silver threads, carrying his own (invisible) bag of tricks on his back. Together they carved a Jack-o’-lantern, putting on a silly face that all the world could see, perched on one of the elegant carved railings of their front porch. They trick-or-treated together, gathering candy and laughing over all the makeshift costumes the neighbor kids were wearing. When Bobby had finally fallen asleep, stunned by sugar, Jack sat out on the front porch, watching parents herd their kids together, thinking of nothing until the candle in the center of his pumpkin had gone out.
Lureen was happy with the new Jack, saying more than once that his trip back home must have done him good. He did more of the housework, apologized to L. D. for missing the El Paso trip, and even snagged the business of a client they’d both been hankering after for years. Jack noticed, though, that this relatively peaceful time was also filled with more: more drinking, more smoking, more late nights in front of the TV because he couldn’t sleep or didn’t want to, even more work since that would keep his brain occupied and his thoughts focused on anger at L. D. rather than despair caused by Ennis. He traveled a lot, too, jumping like a Jackrabbit down to Mexico, back up to Randall again at his ranch outside of Childress, moving faster and faster, afraid to slow down because of what he might start feeling.
When Jack found himself proposed to one night, Randall down on one knee and peering up so earnestly at Jack, his pale skin shimmering in the moonlight, he knew that things had finally gone far enough. He even had a ring, was offering it to Jack along with a promise to move with him, far away, to a place where no one knew them or would care that they were two men living together. Jack heard the phrase “sweet life,” and stood up. Jackass that he was, he just couldn’t take from Randall what Ennis wasn’t willing to give him. This was a way out, but it wasn’t his way.
Jack’s tire blew as he was coming back into Childress one afternoon, back from a trip to scout clients in Wichita Falls. That was what he’d told Lureen, anyway. The truth was that he’d been looking into a new job there, was pretty sure he had the deal sewn up. The secretary had even given him some flyers on local real estate as he was leaving the office. He sighed, slammed his hands against the steering wheel, and maneuvered the car onto the shoulder. He’d just get out, Jack up the tire, change it, and be on his merry way. The faster he could get home and have this conversation with Lureen, the better. He’d just started to work off the first lug nut when he heard the crunch and spit of another car pulling onto the gravel shoulder. Well, fine then. He hadn’t especially wanted company, but maybe this person could help him out. He didn’t look up until a shadow fell across him, someone coming to a stop behind him and clearing his throat. He twisted around, his eyes widening in surprise, and leaped up so fast his tire iron went skittering under the bed of the truck. “Heard I might be able to find you out here.”
One of the things Ennis just can’t get enough of in their new life together is watching Jack. He likes to see him shaving in the morning, cutting the grass, riding his horse along the edge of the corral, and, especially, touching himself. Seems like Jack gets to Jack off in front of his man just about every day now. He’ll slick himself up, then slide one hand nice and slow, up and down his shaft. He leans back against the pillows, stroking his cock, pulling and pumping and sometimes slowing to a leisurely caress. His free hand cups his balls, feathers over the swollen buds of his nipples, rubs soft circles on his belly. And Ennis watches, smiles, and finally kisses Jack where it counts the most.
The way Jack sees it, their life is what he always wanted. Finally, and after all these years of thinking there was nothing he could ever win, he’s hit the Jackpot. He and Ennis, living in a small tidy house together, both working long hours at their jobs, squabbling over smoking and where to go on Ennis’s birthday and whose turn it is to feed the dog. Now everyone knows what they are together. Not everyone is happy about it, but Bobby and Junior and Jenny are young enough to know that their family is, at bottom, just like everyone else’s.
There comes a moment every night that Jack especially cherishes. When they’ve grappled together, tugged and kissed and caressed until their lips and tongues are sore, when their loving is done and Ennis is lying before him, sweat gleaming on his sleek, bare body, Jack looks at him and smiles and thinks, Yeah, baby, you know it. This is the house that Jack built.
I love the word “Jack”-what it means, how it sounds, the man it embodies. So I’ve been thinking for a while about how to turn this into a story of sorts. Hope you enjoy it.
Rating: NC-17
Thanks to: Em (smiles_a_lot), who gave me the idea for the last paragraph. :)
When Jack thinks back over his life so far, wondering what he’s made of himself, it doesn’t take long for a phrase to come to him. It’s a nickname his mother gave him years ago, when he was still working for his father on the ranch, and doing a damn sight better than the old man would allow. Jack-of-all-trades. He could rope anything, fix anything, grow anything, even ride anything-including the stable hand from two ranches over. After one close call too many, though, Jack thought he’d better cut his losses and look for something new to do.
Jack of hearts. That was the card Jack was sure he’d drawn the day he drove up to Aguirre’s shitty old trailer and saw Ennis Del Mar leaning against the side. Long and lean and fair, Ennis mumbled when he spoke, but stole glances at Jack with rich brown eyes that struck sparks off the heavy granite of his heart. Jack knew he’d read his cards correctly the night that whiskey finally gave him courage, helping him to pull Ennis’s hand down onto the forbidden part of himself. He’d felt the firm squeeze, the gentle caress of fingers against the rough denim of Jack’s fly, before Ennis remembered himself and jerked away. Even in the deed’s rough consummation, Jack savored Ennis’s hands cupping his bare ass and spreading him so carefully, then the strong hand that gripped his in the midst of his own rainbow climax, the thumb stroking along his wrist. The only heart Jack cared about then was Ennis’s.
Ennis just had to get married, though, and he turned away from the open invitation in Jack’s eyes, leaving him with a beat-up truck and a bag of rocks in his stomach. Jack had to become Jack Frost then, pretending not to care, locking in a block of ice where his heart used to be. Seemed like every guy he met after that felt the freeze, too. He’d meet up with them in the back alley behind the bar, in someone’s truck, even once in the bathroom at a party, but after they had banged each other senseless, he pulled on his jeans and left, never looking back. And no one ever once asked him to stay. Until he met Lureen, the fire-red hat on her head the palest ember in comparison to the fire that blazed out of her eyes. He liked her fine, had a good time in the back of her daddy’s fancy car, so when she told him about their problem a month or so later, he figured, why the hell not? And became a daddy and a husband all at one blow. He even loved her, in a way.
For the next several years, Jack had to be Jack-in-the-box, popping up wherever he was needed, on call 24 hours a day, it sometimes seemed, to Lureen and Bobby and also Ennis. No matter what Bobby wanted, Jack was always there, never minding the late-night cries or the doctor’s visits or the evenings he’d spend playing cars and Lincoln Logs on the floor of the living room, while Lureen kept a lonely vigil at the office. Things were a little different with her, however; he was willing to work for her father, drive an endless series of combines that all worked the same way, just dressed up with more bells and whistles, and all the rest-but he couldn’t stomach the bedroom stuff after a while. He could get her off and was generally happy to do it, but there was someone else he’d rather have touching him. No fault of hers, of course, and he remembered that. Especially when he was driving back from his twice-yearly camping trips with Ennis, thinking back on all he wasn’t willing to give him, all the things he already had with Lureen.
Ennis got divorced, and Jack’s life Jackknifed like a semi caught speeding on an icy road. He blew off L. D.’s order to follow a shipment of tractors down to their new owners in El Paso, left Lureen a vaguely worded note on the kitchen counter, threw a duffel bag in the back of his truck, and took off. Fourteen straight hours of driving on nothing but coffee, two greasy hamburgers, and pure hot adrenaline. When he got there, he was even glad to see that Ennis’s daughters were in his truck. After all, they’d be part of his life now, too, wouldn’t they? He couldn’t wait to introduce them to Bobby. Finally they would all have a new road to travel down.
After Jack got back from Riverton, he decided the right thing would be to spend more time with Bobby. Frankly he’d been neglecting him, what with working and going out to the bars and mooning after Ennis Del Whatshisname. Jack dressed Bobby up for Halloween in a tiny jester’s suit, sparkling with green and purple and silver threads, carrying his own (invisible) bag of tricks on his back. Together they carved a Jack-o’-lantern, putting on a silly face that all the world could see, perched on one of the elegant carved railings of their front porch. They trick-or-treated together, gathering candy and laughing over all the makeshift costumes the neighbor kids were wearing. When Bobby had finally fallen asleep, stunned by sugar, Jack sat out on the front porch, watching parents herd their kids together, thinking of nothing until the candle in the center of his pumpkin had gone out.
Lureen was happy with the new Jack, saying more than once that his trip back home must have done him good. He did more of the housework, apologized to L. D. for missing the El Paso trip, and even snagged the business of a client they’d both been hankering after for years. Jack noticed, though, that this relatively peaceful time was also filled with more: more drinking, more smoking, more late nights in front of the TV because he couldn’t sleep or didn’t want to, even more work since that would keep his brain occupied and his thoughts focused on anger at L. D. rather than despair caused by Ennis. He traveled a lot, too, jumping like a Jackrabbit down to Mexico, back up to Randall again at his ranch outside of Childress, moving faster and faster, afraid to slow down because of what he might start feeling.
When Jack found himself proposed to one night, Randall down on one knee and peering up so earnestly at Jack, his pale skin shimmering in the moonlight, he knew that things had finally gone far enough. He even had a ring, was offering it to Jack along with a promise to move with him, far away, to a place where no one knew them or would care that they were two men living together. Jack heard the phrase “sweet life,” and stood up. Jackass that he was, he just couldn’t take from Randall what Ennis wasn’t willing to give him. This was a way out, but it wasn’t his way.
Jack’s tire blew as he was coming back into Childress one afternoon, back from a trip to scout clients in Wichita Falls. That was what he’d told Lureen, anyway. The truth was that he’d been looking into a new job there, was pretty sure he had the deal sewn up. The secretary had even given him some flyers on local real estate as he was leaving the office. He sighed, slammed his hands against the steering wheel, and maneuvered the car onto the shoulder. He’d just get out, Jack up the tire, change it, and be on his merry way. The faster he could get home and have this conversation with Lureen, the better. He’d just started to work off the first lug nut when he heard the crunch and spit of another car pulling onto the gravel shoulder. Well, fine then. He hadn’t especially wanted company, but maybe this person could help him out. He didn’t look up until a shadow fell across him, someone coming to a stop behind him and clearing his throat. He twisted around, his eyes widening in surprise, and leaped up so fast his tire iron went skittering under the bed of the truck. “Heard I might be able to find you out here.”
One of the things Ennis just can’t get enough of in their new life together is watching Jack. He likes to see him shaving in the morning, cutting the grass, riding his horse along the edge of the corral, and, especially, touching himself. Seems like Jack gets to Jack off in front of his man just about every day now. He’ll slick himself up, then slide one hand nice and slow, up and down his shaft. He leans back against the pillows, stroking his cock, pulling and pumping and sometimes slowing to a leisurely caress. His free hand cups his balls, feathers over the swollen buds of his nipples, rubs soft circles on his belly. And Ennis watches, smiles, and finally kisses Jack where it counts the most.
The way Jack sees it, their life is what he always wanted. Finally, and after all these years of thinking there was nothing he could ever win, he’s hit the Jackpot. He and Ennis, living in a small tidy house together, both working long hours at their jobs, squabbling over smoking and where to go on Ennis’s birthday and whose turn it is to feed the dog. Now everyone knows what they are together. Not everyone is happy about it, but Bobby and Junior and Jenny are young enough to know that their family is, at bottom, just like everyone else’s.
There comes a moment every night that Jack especially cherishes. When they’ve grappled together, tugged and kissed and caressed until their lips and tongues are sore, when their loving is done and Ennis is lying before him, sweat gleaming on his sleek, bare body, Jack looks at him and smiles and thinks, Yeah, baby, you know it. This is the house that Jack built.