SOS
The world is vast. That can mean a lot of things. It can mean that you can't possibly ever get bored unless you're really lazy. It can also mean that each and everyday is just as overwhelming as the last with indecisiveness. As much as we dub life something to enjoy, something to hope to get over with already... It saddens me. It all very much saddens me to death.
As a human, i feel overwhelmed with pressure to live the way we are intended to live: busy thriving through stress only to find comfort at some point in that cycle. I don't even know how to comprehend a lifestyle like that. In fact, I classify myself as a hikikomori. A shut-in. I don't befriend people, I can't even speak to anyone on the internet. Well to a degree, we all possibly enjoy what we end up hating at the end of the day (mostly ourselves and our unforgivable habits), if not we'd live miserably. With that being said, i find comfort, solace... and i look forward to my hikikomori lifestyle daily... while it slowly eats away at my mind, m heart and soul. I am dying. i am becoming nothingness within myself and the limitations I've brewed.
Yeah yeah, say that all I'm doing is complaining about my unhappiness. Its true. I'm a coward. I sit here and tell myself everything i hate and everything that makes me miserable... but with no intention to rid myself of such. I'm a hopeless and shameful existence. Am I as God intended to be? With such a mind and hand full of potential... am i to live in the shadows with my parents for the rest of my life? Accomplishing nothing? Am I?
If.... someone out there knows my pain.... I selfishly plead you to save me... to help me.... or at least try to be a friend, I promise I won't be a patient and hope to vent to you with each opportunity... I just want to talk... about life, about just about anything. Even toe nails. i care not.
As a human, i feel overwhelmed with pressure to live the way we are intended to live: busy thriving through stress only to find comfort at some point in that cycle. I don't even know how to comprehend a lifestyle like that. In fact, I classify myself as a hikikomori. A shut-in. I don't befriend people, I can't even speak to anyone on the internet. Well to a degree, we all possibly enjoy what we end up hating at the end of the day (mostly ourselves and our unforgivable habits), if not we'd live miserably. With that being said, i find comfort, solace... and i look forward to my hikikomori lifestyle daily... while it slowly eats away at my mind, m heart and soul. I am dying. i am becoming nothingness within myself and the limitations I've brewed.
Yeah yeah, say that all I'm doing is complaining about my unhappiness. Its true. I'm a coward. I sit here and tell myself everything i hate and everything that makes me miserable... but with no intention to rid myself of such. I'm a hopeless and shameful existence. Am I as God intended to be? With such a mind and hand full of potential... am i to live in the shadows with my parents for the rest of my life? Accomplishing nothing? Am I?
If.... someone out there knows my pain.... I selfishly plead you to save me... to help me.... or at least try to be a friend, I promise I won't be a patient and hope to vent to you with each opportunity... I just want to talk... about life, about just about anything. Even toe nails. i care not.