138.1
I have given all that I humanly know how to give, sanctified pieces of myself, locked tightly away in unholy crevices. Yet now I question if I am hated for the mere act of loving him. My actions often seem carelessly callous, this I am well aware. Even when it's often a situation of being misunderstood. However, in this case, my dealings were well planned. You give all that you have and end up wondering why it wasn't enough. This is my plight, one to which I have no resolution.
He refuses my calls. The only time I was able to have him speak sweetly in my ear over the crackling line is when he was obliterated on christ knows what and thought I was his agent. Once he realised it was me, he promptly hung up the phone with tremendous gusto.
Often, I have thought of karma as blind faith in circumstance. Now I wonder if I suffer for past sins. There are certainly measures for which I deserve to pay, as my own blood and flesh have obviously not been enough.
What will make you happy?
He refuses my calls. The only time I was able to have him speak sweetly in my ear over the crackling line is when he was obliterated on christ knows what and thought I was his agent. Once he realised it was me, he promptly hung up the phone with tremendous gusto.
Often, I have thought of karma as blind faith in circumstance. Now I wonder if I suffer for past sins. There are certainly measures for which I deserve to pay, as my own blood and flesh have obviously not been enough.
What will make you happy?