(no subject)
pshaw...oddly, today it occured to me that I should/could write a book, then later today someone very important to me told me I should write something ,because i never write anymore, i thought this odd that these both happened today, and last night I was at my mother's house cleaning out the closet in my old room and I found all my old notebooks from hs and my freshman year in college and I thought/said these are from when I wrote. It's funny to me that all this happened within two days, like something is trying to remind me of what I used to be. I used to be a writer. And the truth is, I'm not anymore, but I gotta say, I liked myself a lot more when I was. I think choosing not to write, when I know I can, is about fear, maybe I'm afraid that I'll put all my effort into writing to ultimately be published and maybe I never will be. The thing is, I know I'll never know what I can do unless I try. I'll start small with the journaling again, and maybe I'll take a class this summer, it's funny what I can achieve when someone is forcing me to do something, in fact everything I've ever written that has been considered "good" has been because someone was forcing me to hit some sort of deadline. I guess I work well under pressure. ha. I haven't had any pressure to write in years and I guess that's when I stopped. Ick.