Evergreen: Chapter 19
Title: Evergreen
Chapter: 19 - Nothing Gold Can Stay
Fandom: Whose Line is it Anyway/Green Screen
Genre: Slash
Pairing(s): Brad/Ryan. Colin/Wayne. Drew/Greg.
Warnings: Really, really, REALLY depressing.
Disclaimer: Don't own Whose Line. Not making money from this.
A/N: AU. This chapter kept making me cry, hence the length of time it took for me to publish it. I've included a line or two from my favourite Robert Frost poem and named the chapter after it, because it seemed so unbelievably fitting here.
-----
Brad turned over in his bed, being careful not to lie on his broken arm, glanced over towards the window and watched the sun break the horizon. It had been a few hours since Ryan had put him to bed; he'd managed to get some sleep, but something in the back of his mind was tormenting him and refusing to let him get any more. If felt like he'd forgotten to do something. He'd packed everything he'd needed for the night - pyjamas, toothbrush, underwear - and Wayne was going to help him collect everything else later that day. He needed to talk to Mr. Davis to get his unemployment certified, and he needed to talk to his landlady, Ms. Kinney, to officially move out of that crummy apartment.
There. That was everything that urgently needed to be sorted out. So why did he still have that jumpy, panicked feeling in his chest?
He shrugged to himself and snuggled down into the warm sheets.
Soon enough, the birds were out and chirruping a gentle song that washed over Brad's ears, lulling him into a daze and eventually into a dream.
-----
In the next room, Ryan hugged the pillow closer to his chest and took another sip of his beer. He checked the clock and groaned; he really should have got to sleep by now. He set the beer down and pulled the covers over himself. He hadn't bothered getting changed, even though Colin had lent him a pair of pyjamas for the night. He just didn't feel like it.
He glanced out of the window, his eyes still stinging from past tears. The storm had finally settled, and it was a beautiful, bright Sunday morning. Already people were out and about, taking out trash, heading to early morning jobs, walking their dogs. The image he was looking at was a direct opposite to how Ryan was feeling.
He bit his lip in an attempt to halt the fresh flow of tears that had built up in his eyes, but to no avail. Hot and heavy, the tears fell. He tried to bury his sobs into his pillow, but only succeeded in leaving dark stains on the material.
Feeling ridiculous at crying over a man he'd met two nights ago, Ryan jerked his head up and brought his hand firmly across his cheek. He reasoned with himself; it was only because Brad was acting so aloof that Ryan was attracted to him. Making people fall in love with him was Ryan's forte. His gift. And because Brad hadn't instantly gone to bed with him, as they usually did, Ryan naturally wanted him all the more. It was a stupid dominance thing.
Right?
-----
Down the road, Jonathan gazed wearily out of his window and watched what he knew would be his last sunrise. It melted beautifully across the landscape, etching long shadows across the streets. He tapped the pen against the pad of paper in front of him, going over what he'd already written.
Dear World,
It's time for me to leave this life and let the deserving people get on with theirs, but first I have some apologies to make:
My parents - To you, I am a disappointment. A failure. A waste of space. But I'm not going to apologise for that. I did what I wanted to do, and that's one of the few things I'm proud of myself for. Instead, I want to apologise for not having the guts to say this to your face: I hate you. And I want you to know that you are partly responsible for my fate. If this note leaves you with any feeling other than guilt, then I have failed once again.
Wayne Brady - I'm sorry for every time I arrived late; I had my excuses, and I want to assure you now that they were all legitimate, but the simple fact is I should have tried harder to just get there on time. I'm sorry for my less-than-satisfactory efforts; as you will no doubt know by the time you read this, I'm not good at facing my problems, and I let them get to me at work thereby depleting my work ethic. You deserved more. And finally, I'm sorry for every time I said "I'm sorry".
Brad Sherwood - You have been my saving Grace these past few months. To you I want to apologise for every Saturday night you were forced to spend with me whining about myself when you could have been doing anything else. I also want to wish you the best of luck with everything. You're a wonderful person, Brad, and no matter how tempting it may be, don't settle for the less when you can have the more.
Karen Maruyama - Forgive me for what you are about to read, as it will be the most cowardly thing I've ever done. I've been meaning to say this for a long, long time, but fear held me back. Well, now I'm not afraid of anything. I love you, Karen. I always have and, if the fates allow, I always will. Please remember me not as the broken fool that you knew, but as the infatuated man that I was. Shoot for the stars, Karen, because you are the most gorgeous and deserving person it has been my good fortune to meet.
He left a small kiss on Karen's name and willed himself to continue.
Leaf subsides to leaf, so Eden sank to grief, so dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.
Jonathan Mangum.
"Screw-Up Extraordinaire," he mumbled as he put the lid on the pen and set it down. He got up and wandered barefoot over to the door, taped the note to the outside of it then gently closed it. He glanced over at the rope that was hanging from his ceiling, dangling over a chair. Feeling oddly at ease with himself, Jonathan slowly locked every single lock.
.x.Sess.x.
Chapter: 19 - Nothing Gold Can Stay
Fandom: Whose Line is it Anyway/Green Screen
Genre: Slash
Pairing(s): Brad/Ryan. Colin/Wayne. Drew/Greg.
Warnings: Really, really, REALLY depressing.
Disclaimer: Don't own Whose Line. Not making money from this.
A/N: AU. This chapter kept making me cry, hence the length of time it took for me to publish it. I've included a line or two from my favourite Robert Frost poem and named the chapter after it, because it seemed so unbelievably fitting here.
-----
Brad turned over in his bed, being careful not to lie on his broken arm, glanced over towards the window and watched the sun break the horizon. It had been a few hours since Ryan had put him to bed; he'd managed to get some sleep, but something in the back of his mind was tormenting him and refusing to let him get any more. If felt like he'd forgotten to do something. He'd packed everything he'd needed for the night - pyjamas, toothbrush, underwear - and Wayne was going to help him collect everything else later that day. He needed to talk to Mr. Davis to get his unemployment certified, and he needed to talk to his landlady, Ms. Kinney, to officially move out of that crummy apartment.
There. That was everything that urgently needed to be sorted out. So why did he still have that jumpy, panicked feeling in his chest?
He shrugged to himself and snuggled down into the warm sheets.
Soon enough, the birds were out and chirruping a gentle song that washed over Brad's ears, lulling him into a daze and eventually into a dream.
-----
In the next room, Ryan hugged the pillow closer to his chest and took another sip of his beer. He checked the clock and groaned; he really should have got to sleep by now. He set the beer down and pulled the covers over himself. He hadn't bothered getting changed, even though Colin had lent him a pair of pyjamas for the night. He just didn't feel like it.
He glanced out of the window, his eyes still stinging from past tears. The storm had finally settled, and it was a beautiful, bright Sunday morning. Already people were out and about, taking out trash, heading to early morning jobs, walking their dogs. The image he was looking at was a direct opposite to how Ryan was feeling.
He bit his lip in an attempt to halt the fresh flow of tears that had built up in his eyes, but to no avail. Hot and heavy, the tears fell. He tried to bury his sobs into his pillow, but only succeeded in leaving dark stains on the material.
Feeling ridiculous at crying over a man he'd met two nights ago, Ryan jerked his head up and brought his hand firmly across his cheek. He reasoned with himself; it was only because Brad was acting so aloof that Ryan was attracted to him. Making people fall in love with him was Ryan's forte. His gift. And because Brad hadn't instantly gone to bed with him, as they usually did, Ryan naturally wanted him all the more. It was a stupid dominance thing.
Right?
-----
Down the road, Jonathan gazed wearily out of his window and watched what he knew would be his last sunrise. It melted beautifully across the landscape, etching long shadows across the streets. He tapped the pen against the pad of paper in front of him, going over what he'd already written.
Dear World,
It's time for me to leave this life and let the deserving people get on with theirs, but first I have some apologies to make:
My parents - To you, I am a disappointment. A failure. A waste of space. But I'm not going to apologise for that. I did what I wanted to do, and that's one of the few things I'm proud of myself for. Instead, I want to apologise for not having the guts to say this to your face: I hate you. And I want you to know that you are partly responsible for my fate. If this note leaves you with any feeling other than guilt, then I have failed once again.
Wayne Brady - I'm sorry for every time I arrived late; I had my excuses, and I want to assure you now that they were all legitimate, but the simple fact is I should have tried harder to just get there on time. I'm sorry for my less-than-satisfactory efforts; as you will no doubt know by the time you read this, I'm not good at facing my problems, and I let them get to me at work thereby depleting my work ethic. You deserved more. And finally, I'm sorry for every time I said "I'm sorry".
Brad Sherwood - You have been my saving Grace these past few months. To you I want to apologise for every Saturday night you were forced to spend with me whining about myself when you could have been doing anything else. I also want to wish you the best of luck with everything. You're a wonderful person, Brad, and no matter how tempting it may be, don't settle for the less when you can have the more.
Karen Maruyama - Forgive me for what you are about to read, as it will be the most cowardly thing I've ever done. I've been meaning to say this for a long, long time, but fear held me back. Well, now I'm not afraid of anything. I love you, Karen. I always have and, if the fates allow, I always will. Please remember me not as the broken fool that you knew, but as the infatuated man that I was. Shoot for the stars, Karen, because you are the most gorgeous and deserving person it has been my good fortune to meet.
He left a small kiss on Karen's name and willed himself to continue.
Leaf subsides to leaf, so Eden sank to grief, so dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.
Jonathan Mangum.
"Screw-Up Extraordinaire," he mumbled as he put the lid on the pen and set it down. He got up and wandered barefoot over to the door, taped the note to the outside of it then gently closed it. He glanced over at the rope that was hanging from his ceiling, dangling over a chair. Feeling oddly at ease with himself, Jonathan slowly locked every single lock.
.x.Sess.x.