(no subject)
Wonder who would have remember..once in a blue moon...i mentioned before...im tired of taking care of ppl and wished to be taken good care of. Ya...i tend to worry too much for frens...like a naggy mommy..thats y rain already started to call me mama...which i forbid her to...god..it makes me sound terribly old!!
And yesterday..one simple sentence touched my heart.
"U have always taken good care of the ppl around u, this time round, let me take good care of u."
Sigh.......
Im again confused here. Last time always whining and complaining that i haven "received" enuff...but now im feeling im "receiving" more than wat im entitled to...more than im giving...and i feel...very uncomfy...almost guilty...
Something is bothering me.
I think i worry too much. Not for myself, but for other ppl.
Dennis's morning msg kinda touched concern bot my life..and we kinda tok bot it. His msg becomes..."Y do u care so much that ..etc..etc..."
I care la...of coz i care...i care that i hurt ppl's feelings..i care that i will let other ppl down...i care~ If im juz a tiny bit more selfish, think i will be happier. No worries, no stress. Kinda feel things are getting out of control...getting too fast. ANd its not a good thing. To review the past, SJ's r/s was an example of such a disaster. Though ended with no scars, but i dont wan that to happen again. Haiz..if i really announced being attached now.....confirm rumours and bad opinions will surface again...about.."she can get attached juz 1mth after breakup...how much can she love her ex-bf?"....."she is so happily attached now, wonder did she ever love her ex-bf?"....etc etc. Really don liked all these comments...explained countless times....im the kind who will put past behind me. Its already over, why dwell over it? Love or no love, its already over. Its time to pick up ur life and move on. Its not something to be proud of when u remain single to dwell over ur ex, embracing the word CHi Qing. Its plain silly. Move on! Why feel sarcastic and skeptical when ur fren can pick up her life after a failed r/s and move into a new happy one? If Rain fall into a romance or get attached with someone she has developed feelings, i will clap both hands heartily and feel so happy for her!
Sigh....time...i need time~
And yesterday..one simple sentence touched my heart.
"U have always taken good care of the ppl around u, this time round, let me take good care of u."
Sigh.......
Im again confused here. Last time always whining and complaining that i haven "received" enuff...but now im feeling im "receiving" more than wat im entitled to...more than im giving...and i feel...very uncomfy...almost guilty...
Something is bothering me.
I think i worry too much. Not for myself, but for other ppl.
Dennis's morning msg kinda touched concern bot my life..and we kinda tok bot it. His msg becomes..."Y do u care so much that ..etc..etc..."
I care la...of coz i care...i care that i hurt ppl's feelings..i care that i will let other ppl down...i care~ If im juz a tiny bit more selfish, think i will be happier. No worries, no stress. Kinda feel things are getting out of control...getting too fast. ANd its not a good thing. To review the past, SJ's r/s was an example of such a disaster. Though ended with no scars, but i dont wan that to happen again. Haiz..if i really announced being attached now.....confirm rumours and bad opinions will surface again...about.."she can get attached juz 1mth after breakup...how much can she love her ex-bf?"....."she is so happily attached now, wonder did she ever love her ex-bf?"....etc etc. Really don liked all these comments...explained countless times....im the kind who will put past behind me. Its already over, why dwell over it? Love or no love, its already over. Its time to pick up ur life and move on. Its not something to be proud of when u remain single to dwell over ur ex, embracing the word CHi Qing. Its plain silly. Move on! Why feel sarcastic and skeptical when ur fren can pick up her life after a failed r/s and move into a new happy one? If Rain fall into a romance or get attached with someone she has developed feelings, i will clap both hands heartily and feel so happy for her!
Sigh....time...i need time~