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Fill: No Refuge from Memory: 1/bcbzofdeathOctober 4 2013, 07:51:44 UTC
He gently pulled away from her kiss and took a step back. She looked at him, puzzled. His cheeks flamed with embarrassment and he rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m sorry, Sarah. It’s just…well…I’ve been alone a long time…and with everything…I’m just not ready.”
Yeah, like that clarified anything, he thought.
“I want to try again. I just need more time to get accustomed.” He continued.
The line reappeared between Sarah’s brows. “It’s Sherlock, isn’t it?”
John stared at her for a moment in confusion. “Sherlock? What’s Sherlock got to do with anything?”
“Really?” she replied in an exasperated tone, “You expect me to explain it? Listen, why don’t you go home to Sherlock and ask him the reason that you are not spending the night with me.”
The realization hit John like a ton of bricks, “Oh, no, Sarah, I swear I’m not gay. We’re not like that. We’re just really good mates.”
She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. “Right, listen. I suddenly feel a headache coming on. I think it’s best if we wait until tomorrow to continue this conversation.”
His face heated again. Feeling mixture of chagrin and relief, he returned to the sanctuary of his flat on Baker Street.
Sherlock was playing the violin when John stepped inside. He couldn’t tell whether he was playing that experimental piece again or whether he was just making noises at random. Sherlock’s brows rose when he entered, but he kept on playing.
John headed into the kitchen and pulled a lager out of the fridge. He shook his head at the cling film-covered brain that occupied the middle shelf, but couldn’t be bothered to lodge a complaint.
He sat in his chair and took a long sip. Sherlock’s violin emitted a piercing shriek.
“Sherlock.”
Sherlock ignored him.
“Sherlock.” He said louder. His flatmate looked up. “Could you give it a rest for a bit?”
He didn’t respond, but packed the violin into its case, then threw himself onto the sofa. “Things didn’t go well with Sarah, I assume.”
John sighed. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
He could almost hear Sherlock’s eyeroll. “I don’t know why you waste your time with her.”
“I thought you liked Sarah.”
Sherlock grunted. “I don’t have a problem with her. She’s not a complete idiot and she’s good to have around in a fight. What I don’t understand is why you devote so much energy to a relationship that is doomed to failure.”
John didn’t respond for a long time. He finished his lager before asking. “What’s wrong with Sarah and me?”
Sherlock’s tone was clipped, “Spare me the pity party. There’s nothing wrong with Sarah or you. The problem is that all of the attraction is on her end. I’m not the expert in social mores that you are, but I’m pretty sure the way that you are leading her on isn’t very nice.” Sherlock pronounced ‘nice’ in the same tone that most people used for ‘herpes.’
For a moment, John felt a swell of anger. He wanted to protest, “I’m not leading her on!” then he mentally reviewed all of their dates. Every time, he was the one who ended the evening. He remembered the kiss they’d shared that night. He hadn’t felt a shred of arousal. He got up, threw away the bottle, and retreated upstairs to his room.
He called Sarah the next morning. She was disappointed, but not surprised, and because she was a far, far better person than John deserved, she agreed to remain friends.
A/N: To everyone who read this, THANK YOU. A word of warning, shit is going to get massively fucked up. There will be TRIGGERS later on. In order to keep spoilers to a minimum, I issue trigger warnings at the top of each part. So if this is a concern, please, please, please be sure to check the top of each fill before reading. Comments, complaints, cat pictures, etc. are all welcome. I do my own beta and Britpick so I’m sure I missed something. I’m currently working on part 4, so I’ll probably have 2 up by tomorrow or the day after.
I really like the way you've slipped in bits of disordered thinking--better person than John deserved and so on. It builds the atmosphere well without overdoing it.
Yeah, like that clarified anything, he thought.
“I want to try again. I just need more time to get accustomed.” He continued.
The line reappeared between Sarah’s brows. “It’s Sherlock, isn’t it?”
John stared at her for a moment in confusion. “Sherlock? What’s Sherlock got to do with anything?”
“Really?” she replied in an exasperated tone, “You expect me to explain it? Listen, why don’t you go home to Sherlock and ask him the reason that you are not spending the night with me.”
The realization hit John like a ton of bricks, “Oh, no, Sarah, I swear I’m not gay. We’re not like that. We’re just really good mates.”
She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. “Right, listen. I suddenly feel a headache coming on. I think it’s best if we wait until tomorrow to continue this conversation.”
His face heated again. Feeling mixture of chagrin and relief, he returned to the sanctuary of his flat on Baker Street.
Sherlock was playing the violin when John stepped inside. He couldn’t tell whether he was playing that experimental piece again or whether he was just making noises at random. Sherlock’s brows rose when he entered, but he kept on playing.
John headed into the kitchen and pulled a lager out of the fridge. He shook his head at the cling film-covered brain that occupied the middle shelf, but couldn’t be bothered to lodge a complaint.
He sat in his chair and took a long sip. Sherlock’s violin emitted a piercing shriek.
“Sherlock.”
Sherlock ignored him.
“Sherlock.” He said louder. His flatmate looked up. “Could you give it a rest for a bit?”
He didn’t respond, but packed the violin into its case, then threw himself onto the sofa. “Things didn’t go well with Sarah, I assume.”
John sighed. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
He could almost hear Sherlock’s eyeroll. “I don’t know why you waste your time with her.”
“I thought you liked Sarah.”
Sherlock grunted. “I don’t have a problem with her. She’s not a complete idiot and she’s good to have around in a fight. What I don’t understand is why you devote so much energy to a relationship that is doomed to failure.”
John didn’t respond for a long time. He finished his lager before asking. “What’s wrong with Sarah and me?”
Sherlock’s tone was clipped, “Spare me the pity party. There’s nothing wrong with Sarah or you. The problem is that all of the attraction is on her end. I’m not the expert in social mores that you are, but I’m pretty sure the way that you are leading her on isn’t very nice.” Sherlock pronounced ‘nice’ in the same tone that most people used for ‘herpes.’
For a moment, John felt a swell of anger. He wanted to protest, “I’m not leading her on!” then he mentally reviewed all of their dates. Every time, he was the one who ended the evening. He remembered the kiss they’d shared that night. He hadn’t felt a shred of arousal. He got up, threw away the bottle, and retreated upstairs to his room.
He called Sarah the next morning. She was disappointed, but not surprised, and because she was a far, far better person than John deserved, she agreed to remain friends.
A/N: To everyone who read this, THANK YOU. A word of warning, shit is going to get massively fucked up. There will be TRIGGERS later on. In order to keep spoilers to a minimum, I issue trigger warnings at the top of each part. So if this is a concern, please, please, please be sure to check the top of each fill before reading. Comments, complaints, cat pictures, etc. are all welcome. I do my own beta and Britpick so I’m sure I missed something. I’m currently working on part 4, so I’ll probably have 2 up by tomorrow or the day after.
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Will be interested to read more!
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Reading this, it just hit me - and I don't mean to be funny - parts of John's brain, the earlier memories, are in cling film too... Nice metaphor.
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