FILL: Sex is Boring (2b/?)oxfordtweedMarch 6 2011, 11:15:26 UTC
“Is that where you’ve been all day?” asked John. “Freaking out inside that massive head of yours?”
Damnit, why didn’t John play by the rules?
“A bit,” Sherlock admitted.
John actually laughed. Not a malicious laugh, but a soft, almost appreciative laugh. “Right,” he said easily. “I didn’t think about that. Didn’t even realise it was a possibility.” He took his hand away. “Sorry if I… sort of spooked you, then. Do you want me to leave for the night? I can stay somewhere else, if you want to… I don’t know. Whatever it is you do.”
Did John understand? Was it normal to react badly after the first time? Something everyone did? Sherlock did have to admit that most of the addictions he’d formed were to something that had made him physically ill the first time he’d tried it. Was sex the same way? Something to which the body grew accustomed until it eventually craved it?
He’d have to research that.
“No, it’s fine,” Sherlock said. “Stay. I think… I think I might have a nap, actually. I didn’t sleep last night.”
He got up to go change into his pyjamas.
“What do you want me to do with this?” John called after him, pointing at the dead mouse.
“Fridge,” Sherlock answered.
He’d barely slept for an hour before waking up to the sound of one of John’s quiz shows. It was the one that didn’t make any sense as a quiz show, as the host only got round to asking maybe three or four questions over the span of the episode.
The host was going on about honeybees; nothing Sherlock didn’t already know. He barely paid any attention, focusing instead on the way John lightly ran his fingers over his instep, just as he always did when Sherlock would nap on the sofa. This had become normal for them, long Before, and he was pleased to find that it was one aspect of their relationship that hadn’t changed.
“And what’s interesting - dunno who did this - if you give them cocaine, they exaggerate.”
Sherlock perked slightly, not entirely sure he’d heard what he thought he had. The host, whatever his name was, was still talking about honeybees, but had moved to a slightly different topic.
“They claim there’s more honey than there is. They overdo it. They get boastful, essentially.”
Forgetting all about John, Sherlock shifted to reach for his phone on the coffee table, but John was at a better angle and not slowed down by recent sleep and snatched it up first.
“Don’t you even dare,” he warned calmly, slipping the phone into his pocket.
Sherlock glared at him, knowing that if he wanted to experiment with honeybees and anything, it was just a matter of a few text messages to get everything he’d need. But John seemed angry just at the prospect. John the Flatmate would interpret Sherlock’s doing so as irresponsible, no doubt. But what about this new John? John the whatever sex had made him become? Boyfriend? Partner? Either way, he was likely to mark it as some sort of betrayal. Now that they had paired off, Sherlock would be expected to do certain things for John. Not just sexual thing, but emotional as well. Things like not deliberately violating his trust.
FILL: Sex is Boring (2c/?)oxfordtweedMarch 6 2011, 11:16:07 UTC
Perhaps being single was easier.
“John,” Sherlock ventured. He found himself unsure how to follow that, so he just left it there.
John looked over at him, his hand moving slightly toward the pocket where he’d hidden Sherlock’s phone. “Does this have anything to do with Class A substances?” he asked.
Apparently, he was on the same page as Sherlock when it came to trust.
“No. Last night.” John could keep his phone. Sherlock wasn’t in the mood to experiment with bees, anyway. Maybe later.
John watched him, waiting patiently for Sherlock to say what he had been thinking since the night before. He didn’t want to push or rush him into anything, plainly. Sherlock wondered if he felt guilty about the night before.
“I don’t know if it’s something I’d want to do again,” Sherlock said after a moment. “It wasn’t…”
Wasn’t what? He didn’t know.
John licked his lips. “When you said that you hadn’t been with anyone?” he asked. “Did you mean anyone at all, or another bloke?”
“Anyone at all,” Sherlock said. “Perhaps it gets better over time. I don’t know. But I didn’t find it enjoyable and don’t think it’s worth repeating.”
He watched John, trying to read his reactions. Disappointment. Hurt. Confusion. All expected and all present.
“Did you want to?” he asked. “Last night?”
Guilt.
Sherlock shrugged. “At the time, I thought I had. As events progressed, I wasn’t sure how to stop it. Didn’t know if I was supposed to; how you might have reacted if I did.”
“So, you didn’t?” John asked.
“No,” Sherlock said honestly. John looked away, and Sherlock realised that he had said the wrong thing. “We’re two consenting adults who knew what we were getting into.”
“I don’t think you did,” John said. “Are you aware of informed consent, Sherlock? It’s one thing to say yes to something if you know what’s going on. But if you agree to do something without having all of the information, it’s not really consenting.”
“You didn’t force yourself on me,” Sherlock said, putting a bit more bite into the words than he’d meant to. “I knew what I was doing. I just don’t want to do it again.”
John studied him for a long while, chewing lightly on his lip. “Great. Fine,” he said. “What do you want to do, then?”
Sherlock turned his attention back to John’s quiz show. Boring.
“Go back to sleep,” he said, stretching out and sliding his feet under John’s hands.
After a few moments of silence between them, John’s thumb began tracing patterns on Sherlock’s instep again, eventually pulling Sherlock back into a light sleep.
Re: FILL: Sex is Boring (2c/?)narcoleptic_llMarch 6 2011, 16:55:25 UTC
Well, I'm afraid I can't help you there, I'm more into the Sherlock side of the spectrum, however if John is one of those people who use sex as a way to demonstrate how much they love their partner, then he's in for a world of frustrations and second guessing.
Try to put yourself in his shoes. How it would be to go for a hug, because you need it in the same way you need to drink water and eat; only to be brushed off because something more appealing to your partner's interests is going on? And it also depends on how asexual Sherlock actually is, is he aromantic as well? Does he like cuddling? Is the prospective of John thinking they might have sex after kissing what puts him off?
Anyway, good luck I guess and keep up that writing!
Re: FILL: Sex is Boring (2c/?)oxfordtweedMarch 6 2011, 17:10:19 UTC
Yeah, I've been with the same guy forever. If I had my way, we'd never have sex. Hell, half the time, I wind up just sleeping on the sofa.
My partner's very physical. But that's exactly why this prompt really struck a chord with me. Much as I love how much the topic of asexuality comes up in this fandom, there is a certain lack of realism in most of the fic out there.
Re: FILL: Sex is Boring (2c/?)narcoleptic_llMarch 6 2011, 17:18:24 UTC
mmm, if I had my way, yeah... same here. I've only been with my gf for 11 months and it has proven to be quite the challenge. I'm the kind of person who just squirms and flinches away from touch and other stuff if I'm not in the mood for touching (let alone sex!), but then I get to see her face, her very much HURT face and it kind of hurts me too, for a split second makes me wish I were different. We're just wired differently. And as much as it's been a shock for her to hear exactly how UNinterested I am in anything sexual, it's also been a shock for me to hear how much she needs it.
And yes, there is a serious lack of realism when it comes to this topic on the fandom. This prompt touched a chord with me too, which is why I filled it too (it's just below yours), but even when I actually know how it is, I don't think I fully managed to do it justice. John's POV is haaaaaaaaard!
Re: FILL: Sex is Boring (2c/?)oxfordtweedMarch 6 2011, 17:29:58 UTC
Hell. After over a decade, it still shocks him to realise it. I've been getting the evil eye for the last three hours.
Basically, my basis for John is the guy who has been spending the last twenty minutes creeping his hand from my ankle clear up to my hip. He's up to my knee right now, and about two minutes away from getting that evil eye shot right back at him.
Re: FILL: Sex is Boring (2c/?)kellen_leeMarch 6 2011, 20:03:13 UTC
Oh, I'm worried for them both -- I hope they're able to talk about it and work something out. John is lucky that Sherlock was up front with him though, although that had to be hard to hear. Very realistic take, from what I've heard. I can't wait to read the next bit!
Re: FILL: Sex is Boring (2c/?)oxfordtweedMarch 7 2011, 08:33:45 UTC
Thanks!
I think it's funny -- I've been posting this to my fic journal as well, and I've had people say that Sherlock has been both up front, and not honest enough. Which really just goes to show how positively frustrating these situations can be. Too much information, and you hurt the other person; not enough, and you just piss them off.
Damnit, why didn’t John play by the rules?
“A bit,” Sherlock admitted.
John actually laughed. Not a malicious laugh, but a soft, almost appreciative laugh. “Right,” he said easily. “I didn’t think about that. Didn’t even realise it was a possibility.” He took his hand away. “Sorry if I… sort of spooked you, then. Do you want me to leave for the night? I can stay somewhere else, if you want to… I don’t know. Whatever it is you do.”
Did John understand? Was it normal to react badly after the first time? Something everyone did? Sherlock did have to admit that most of the addictions he’d formed were to something that had made him physically ill the first time he’d tried it. Was sex the same way? Something to which the body grew accustomed until it eventually craved it?
He’d have to research that.
“No, it’s fine,” Sherlock said. “Stay. I think… I think I might have a nap, actually. I didn’t sleep last night.”
He got up to go change into his pyjamas.
“What do you want me to do with this?” John called after him, pointing at the dead mouse.
“Fridge,” Sherlock answered.
He’d barely slept for an hour before waking up to the sound of one of John’s quiz shows. It was the one that didn’t make any sense as a quiz show, as the host only got round to asking maybe three or four questions over the span of the episode.
The host was going on about honeybees; nothing Sherlock didn’t already know. He barely paid any attention, focusing instead on the way John lightly ran his fingers over his instep, just as he always did when Sherlock would nap on the sofa. This had become normal for them, long Before, and he was pleased to find that it was one aspect of their relationship that hadn’t changed.
“And what’s interesting - dunno who did this - if you give them cocaine, they exaggerate.”
Sherlock perked slightly, not entirely sure he’d heard what he thought he had. The host, whatever his name was, was still talking about honeybees, but had moved to a slightly different topic.
“They claim there’s more honey than there is. They overdo it. They get boastful, essentially.”
Forgetting all about John, Sherlock shifted to reach for his phone on the coffee table, but John was at a better angle and not slowed down by recent sleep and snatched it up first.
“Don’t you even dare,” he warned calmly, slipping the phone into his pocket.
Sherlock glared at him, knowing that if he wanted to experiment with honeybees and anything, it was just a matter of a few text messages to get everything he’d need. But John seemed angry just at the prospect. John the Flatmate would interpret Sherlock’s doing so as irresponsible, no doubt. But what about this new John? John the whatever sex had made him become? Boyfriend? Partner? Either way, he was likely to mark it as some sort of betrayal. Now that they had paired off, Sherlock would be expected to do certain things for John. Not just sexual thing, but emotional as well. Things like not deliberately violating his trust.
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“John,” Sherlock ventured. He found himself unsure how to follow that, so he just left it there.
John looked over at him, his hand moving slightly toward the pocket where he’d hidden Sherlock’s phone. “Does this have anything to do with Class A substances?” he asked.
Apparently, he was on the same page as Sherlock when it came to trust.
“No. Last night.” John could keep his phone. Sherlock wasn’t in the mood to experiment with bees, anyway. Maybe later.
John watched him, waiting patiently for Sherlock to say what he had been thinking since the night before. He didn’t want to push or rush him into anything, plainly. Sherlock wondered if he felt guilty about the night before.
“I don’t know if it’s something I’d want to do again,” Sherlock said after a moment. “It wasn’t…”
Wasn’t what? He didn’t know.
John licked his lips. “When you said that you hadn’t been with anyone?” he asked. “Did you mean anyone at all, or another bloke?”
“Anyone at all,” Sherlock said. “Perhaps it gets better over time. I don’t know. But I didn’t find it enjoyable and don’t think it’s worth repeating.”
He watched John, trying to read his reactions. Disappointment. Hurt. Confusion. All expected and all present.
“Did you want to?” he asked. “Last night?”
Guilt.
Sherlock shrugged. “At the time, I thought I had. As events progressed, I wasn’t sure how to stop it. Didn’t know if I was supposed to; how you might have reacted if I did.”
“So, you didn’t?” John asked.
“No,” Sherlock said honestly. John looked away, and Sherlock realised that he had said the wrong thing. “We’re two consenting adults who knew what we were getting into.”
“I don’t think you did,” John said. “Are you aware of informed consent, Sherlock? It’s one thing to say yes to something if you know what’s going on. But if you agree to do something without having all of the information, it’s not really consenting.”
“You didn’t force yourself on me,” Sherlock said, putting a bit more bite into the words than he’d meant to. “I knew what I was doing. I just don’t want to do it again.”
John studied him for a long while, chewing lightly on his lip. “Great. Fine,” he said. “What do you want to do, then?”
Sherlock turned his attention back to John’s quiz show. Boring.
“Go back to sleep,” he said, stretching out and sliding his feet under John’s hands.
After a few moments of silence between them, John’s thumb began tracing patterns on Sherlock’s instep again, eventually pulling Sherlock back into a light sleep.
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My sympathies go to Sherlock, though.
I really like what you're doing here, hope to see more of you soon!
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Try to put yourself in his shoes. How it would be to go for a hug, because you need it in the same way you need to drink water and eat; only to be brushed off because something more appealing to your partner's interests is going on? And it also depends on how asexual Sherlock actually is, is he aromantic as well? Does he like cuddling? Is the prospective of John thinking they might have sex after kissing what puts him off?
Anyway, good luck I guess and keep up that writing!
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My partner's very physical. But that's exactly why this prompt really struck a chord with me. Much as I love how much the topic of asexuality comes up in this fandom, there is a certain lack of realism in most of the fic out there.
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And yes, there is a serious lack of realism when it comes to this topic on the fandom. This prompt touched a chord with me too, which is why I filled it too (it's just below yours), but even when I actually know how it is, I don't think I fully managed to do it justice. John's POV is haaaaaaaaard!
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Basically, my basis for John is the guy who has been spending the last twenty minutes creeping his hand from my ankle clear up to my hip. He's up to my knee right now, and about two minutes away from getting that evil eye shot right back at him.
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I think it's funny -- I've been posting this to my fic journal as well, and I've had people say that Sherlock has been both up front, and not honest enough. Which really just goes to show how positively frustrating these situations can be. Too much information, and you hurt the other person; not enough, and you just piss them off.
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