FILL: Because You're Worth It (1/2)
anonymous
September 18 2010, 17:51:55 UTC
A/N: I was so tempted to let not!Anthea do the bidding by proxy but Mycroft got all "Back off, bitches - he's mine!" so... yeah. XD
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The M.C.'s voice cut through the general chatter in the hotel function suite. "Now, Ladies and Gentlemen, the moment I know quite a few of you have been waiting for... our Date with a Detective auction!"
"Oh, hell." Lestrade sighed. "I was hoping to be away before this started. Thought it was meant to be later?"
Donovan smirked back at him. "They must have moved it up, Sir - probably want to have it before most of the guests are too drunk." She was in a stunning blue dress. Anderson had barely been able to take his eyes off her all evening - which was of course the whole point.
Lestrade sat back in his chair and loosened his bow-tie with one hand while he reached for his pint with the other. Hated having things about his neck - always had done since that Soho Strangler case and he'd almost ended up as Victim #8. He'd have to be careful not to lose it though - the tux and the tie had to be back at the rental place on Monday.
"Our first victim - sorry, willing volunteer," the M.C. knowingly winked at his audience. "is..." He glanced down at the card in his hand. "Detective Inspector Lestrade!"
Lestrade choked on his pint. What the f--?
There were loud cheers and several wolf whistles as every pair of eyes in the room suddenly turned towards him. "Get yourself up here, D.I. Lestrade!" the M.C. called.
Gregson! Lestrade scanned the crowd and picked out Gregson lounging by the bar with an enormous grin on his face. He raised his glass to Lestrade in a mock toast and gestured to the stage.
Donovan's grin was almost as big. "Go on, Sir - it's for charity, remember?"
He leaned over towards her as he slowly drained his pint and got up. "Donovan - for the love of God, put a bid in - I'll pay you back myself."
"What?"
"I don't want to be standing up there like a total prat with nobody bidding."
Donovan started to laugh then shut up when she saw he was serious. "Not going to be a problem, Sir. Don't worry."
"Come on, Lestrade - don't keep the ladies waiting." Bradstreet grabbed him by the arm and hauled him forward.
Lestrade had a sinking feeling in his stomach he'd not felt since the first time he'd got called to the Super's office on account of Sherlock breaking into a crime scene. He stumbled up onto the stage to raucous applause.
"Don't worry" - all very well for Sally to say. If it was her up here some of the blokes in the room would be offering kidneys - and Anderson would be volunteering to remove them. Still, they'd probably want to keep the younger, better looking lads for later in the auction.
"Now, as you know, the winning bidder gets the company of their chosen Detective for a full evening. What you do with him is entirely up to you - as long as it's nothing illegal, eh?"
Lestrade felt his face flush as the audience laughed. Oh God...
The M.C. clapped him on the shoulder. "So who'll start the bidding for this strapping specimen of Scotland Yard's finest?"
Please... anybody...
"Twenty pounds!" Donovan called from the back.
Thank you, Sally! Lestrade could've kissed her right at that moment. Great... Bang your hammer or whatever... Going once, going twice and then I'm just going...
"Thirty!"
What? Lestrade's head snapped down to the front of the stage where a small crowd had gathered. Where did they all come from? He thought he recognised the woman who'd spoken as being somebody in HR; a plump lady in her late fifties. She winked at him and Lestrade smiled weakly back at her. Come on, Donovan...
FILL: Because You're Worth It (2/2)
anonymous
September 18 2010, 18:05:06 UTC
"Fifty!"
"Sixty!"
"Seventy!"
Lestrade was glad people were feeling generous but didn't they know there would be other people up here? Just because he was up first, didn't mean they all had to bid for him.
"Eighty!" The older lady from Admin again - she had a very... hungry look about her. He shifted uncomfortably and she licked her lips. In fact quite a few of the audience seemed to be unconsciously doing that. What the hell was wrong with them?
Although it is hot in here... or that might just be me...
"One hundred!"
A hundred quid!
"One hundred pounds I'm bid! Come on, ladies - he scrubs up quite nice after all." The M.C. grinned broadly at Lestrade.
"One ten!"
One twenty... One thirty... One fifty...One sixty...One eighty...Two hundred... Two fifty... The bids were still coming in faster than Lestrade could keep up with. He was starting to feel dizzy - and getting more than a little worried about what might be expected of him on this 'date'. This was well into the realms of serious money now.
"Three hundred!" A red-haired woman held her hand up and positively leered in Lestrade's direction.
Bloody hell! Isn't that the Super's wife?
"Five thousand pounds."
The calm, authoritative voice cut across the chatter in the ballroom like a knife. There was a stunned silence, both at the amount and the obviously masculine voice that had announced it.
The M.C. covered the mic with his hand and whispered to Lestrade. "Are we... are we accepting bids from men?"
Five grand... Lestrade felt weak at the knees. "I think for that kind of money we have to."
"Is, er, is that a serious bid, Sir?" the M.C. asked.
The figure at the back of the room stepped forward from the gloom by the doorway and leaned on his umbrella. "Quite serious, I assure you." He reached into his inside breast pocket and drew out a bundle of notes.
The M.C. took a deep breath, shrugged and proclaimed, "Sold! To the gentleman at the back."
Lestrade stepped down from the stage in a daze. The crowd parted before him like the Red Sea. Apart from the odd murmur they were still standing in open-mouthed shock. He walked slowly through them, barely even registering they were there, and stopped in front of Mycroft. "I-- I thought you didn't want us to be public knowledge," he muttered.
"I reconsidered."
"When?"
Mycroft lowered his voice. "When the Chief Superintendent's wife bid three hundred pounds for you and looked directly at your crotch. I suspect you may have found yourself with a very tricky dilemma."
"Oh." So it was to get him out of a tight spot then, well that made sense...
"Also, I decided I really couldn't bear the thought of someone else thinking they had any rights to something I consider mine." Mycroft smiled and tucked the wad of notes into Lestrade's waistband.
Lestrade looked down and blushed even harder. When he looked up again, Mycroft grabbed his lapels and kissed him.
Lestrade vaguely heard Mycroft's umbrella clatter to the floor behind him. If he had any remaining doubts that he was being publicly claimed, the possessiveness and hunger in that kiss obliterated them completely. His hands came up and rested on Mycroft's waist, pulling his lover closer as the whole hotel vanished around them.
When they finally broke apart, light-headed and breathless, Lestrade became horrifyingly aware of everybody in the room still looking at them. It made the skin on the back of his neck crawl.
Mycroft smiled. "I think it's time I took my prize out of here. Don't worry, your colleague, D.I. Gregson, is about to give us a diversion."
"He is?"
"He's choking on a dry roasted peanut he inhaled when I kissed you."
There was a sudden urgent shout from the bar.
"Shall we?" Mycroft flicked his umbrella up into his hand with his foot and ushered Lestrade out to the waiting car. "I'm looking forward to a prompt return on my investment."
Lestrade smiled broadly and Mycroft decided that alone was worth every penny...
Re: FILL: Because You're Worth It (2/2)beautybecksSeptember 18 2010, 18:42:05 UTC
SQUEEEE! You have actually made me squee and my 10 year old brother disown me (don't worry, he'll soon forgive me because I baked him double-chocolate cookies just for such occasions) Thank you for writing this. I am grinning from ear to ear. I'm a sucker for possessive Mycroft so I'm glad he made an appearance. Yay! You've made me very happy! XD
Re: FILL: Because You're Worth It (2/2)beautybecksSeptember 21 2010, 11:23:18 UTC
Bless Lestrade, he totally would have freaked (which might have been interesting to see. Why do I have the urge to make him run away to Belgium a la Stephen Fry?)
Anyhoo, thanks again for filling this. I am grinning like a cat which has the cream (or a Mycroft who has Lestrade) XD
Re: FILL: Because You're Worth It (2/2)sanji09September 19 2010, 02:43:54 UTC
Aw man, not only did you have awesome possessive Mycroft, but adorable thinking-he's-not-so-totally-hot-eyecandy-Lestrade. I aw'd so many times when he thought no one was going to bit for litle ol him. xD
Re: FILL: Because You're Worth It (2/2)elfbertSeptember 19 2010, 14:15:17 UTC
Aww, that was both hilarious and adorable. I made my OH enquire as to my wellbeing by laughing so hard! Love insecure Lestrade and possessive Mycroft! Also love choking Gregson XD
Re: FILL: Because You're Worth It (2/2)
anonymous
September 21 2010, 08:58:23 UTC
Thanks! Sorry to cause concern to your OH! ;)
And yeah, Gregson was asking for it. His little joke backfired a bit as did his peanut. Lucky for him Mycroft will be distracted for the next wee while and in the mood for something other than revenge...
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The M.C.'s voice cut through the general chatter in the hotel function suite. "Now, Ladies and Gentlemen, the moment I know quite a few of you have been waiting for... our Date with a Detective auction!"
"Oh, hell." Lestrade sighed. "I was hoping to be away before this started. Thought it was meant to be later?"
Donovan smirked back at him. "They must have moved it up, Sir - probably want to have it before most of the guests are too drunk." She was in a stunning blue dress. Anderson had barely been able to take his eyes off her all evening - which was of course the whole point.
Lestrade sat back in his chair and loosened his bow-tie with one hand while he reached for his pint with the other. Hated having things about his neck - always had done since that Soho Strangler case and he'd almost ended up as Victim #8. He'd have to be careful not to lose it though - the tux and the tie had to be back at the rental place on Monday.
"Our first victim - sorry, willing volunteer," the M.C. knowingly winked at his audience. "is..." He glanced down at the card in his hand. "Detective Inspector Lestrade!"
Lestrade choked on his pint. What the f--?
There were loud cheers and several wolf whistles as every pair of eyes in the room suddenly turned towards him. "Get yourself up here, D.I. Lestrade!" the M.C. called.
Gregson! Lestrade scanned the crowd and picked out Gregson lounging by the bar with an enormous grin on his face. He raised his glass to Lestrade in a mock toast and gestured to the stage.
Donovan's grin was almost as big. "Go on, Sir - it's for charity, remember?"
He leaned over towards her as he slowly drained his pint and got up. "Donovan - for the love of God, put a bid in - I'll pay you back myself."
"What?"
"I don't want to be standing up there like a total prat with nobody bidding."
Donovan started to laugh then shut up when she saw he was serious. "Not going to be a problem, Sir. Don't worry."
"Come on, Lestrade - don't keep the ladies waiting." Bradstreet grabbed him by the arm and hauled him forward.
Lestrade had a sinking feeling in his stomach he'd not felt since the first time he'd got called to the Super's office on account of Sherlock breaking into a crime scene. He stumbled up onto the stage to raucous applause.
"Don't worry" - all very well for Sally to say. If it was her up here some of the blokes in the room would be offering kidneys - and Anderson would be volunteering to remove them. Still, they'd probably want to keep the younger, better looking lads for later in the auction.
"Now, as you know, the winning bidder gets the company of their chosen Detective for a full evening. What you do with him is entirely up to you - as long as it's nothing illegal, eh?"
Lestrade felt his face flush as the audience laughed. Oh God...
The M.C. clapped him on the shoulder. "So who'll start the bidding for this strapping specimen of Scotland Yard's finest?"
Please... anybody...
"Twenty pounds!" Donovan called from the back.
Thank you, Sally! Lestrade could've kissed her right at that moment. Great... Bang your hammer or whatever... Going once, going twice and then I'm just going...
"Thirty!"
What? Lestrade's head snapped down to the front of the stage where a small crowd had gathered. Where did they all come from? He thought he recognised the woman who'd spoken as being somebody in HR; a plump lady in her late fifties. She winked at him and Lestrade smiled weakly back at her. Come on, Donovan...
"Forty!"
Yes! Wait - that wasn't Sally...
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"Sixty!"
"Seventy!"
Lestrade was glad people were feeling generous but didn't they know there would be other people up here? Just because he was up first, didn't mean they all had to bid for him.
"Eighty!" The older lady from Admin again - she had a very... hungry look about her. He shifted uncomfortably and she licked her lips. In fact quite a few of the audience seemed to be unconsciously doing that. What the hell was wrong with them?
Although it is hot in here... or that might just be me...
"One hundred!"
A hundred quid!
"One hundred pounds I'm bid! Come on, ladies - he scrubs up quite nice after all." The M.C. grinned broadly at Lestrade.
"One ten!"
One twenty... One thirty... One fifty...One sixty...One eighty...Two hundred... Two fifty... The bids were still coming in faster than Lestrade could keep up with. He was starting to feel dizzy - and getting more than a little worried about what might be expected of him on this 'date'. This was well into the realms of serious money now.
"Three hundred!" A red-haired woman held her hand up and positively leered in Lestrade's direction.
Bloody hell! Isn't that the Super's wife?
"Five thousand pounds."
The calm, authoritative voice cut across the chatter in the ballroom like a knife. There was a stunned silence, both at the amount and the obviously masculine voice that had announced it.
The M.C. covered the mic with his hand and whispered to Lestrade. "Are we... are we accepting bids from men?"
Five grand... Lestrade felt weak at the knees. "I think for that kind of money we have to."
"Is, er, is that a serious bid, Sir?" the M.C. asked.
The figure at the back of the room stepped forward from the gloom by the doorway and leaned on his umbrella. "Quite serious, I assure you." He reached into his inside breast pocket and drew out a bundle of notes.
The M.C. took a deep breath, shrugged and proclaimed, "Sold! To the gentleman at the back."
Lestrade stepped down from the stage in a daze. The crowd parted before him like the Red Sea. Apart from the odd murmur they were still standing in open-mouthed shock. He walked slowly through them, barely even registering they were there, and stopped in front of Mycroft. "I-- I thought you didn't want us to be public knowledge," he muttered.
"I reconsidered."
"When?"
Mycroft lowered his voice. "When the Chief Superintendent's wife bid three hundred pounds for you and looked directly at your crotch. I suspect you may have found yourself with a very tricky dilemma."
"Oh." So it was to get him out of a tight spot then, well that made sense...
"Also, I decided I really couldn't bear the thought of someone else thinking they had any rights to something I consider mine." Mycroft smiled and tucked the wad of notes into Lestrade's waistband.
Lestrade looked down and blushed even harder. When he looked up again, Mycroft grabbed his lapels and kissed him.
Lestrade vaguely heard Mycroft's umbrella clatter to the floor behind him. If he had any remaining doubts that he was being publicly claimed, the possessiveness and hunger in that kiss obliterated them completely. His hands came up and rested on Mycroft's waist, pulling his lover closer as the whole hotel vanished around them.
When they finally broke apart, light-headed and breathless, Lestrade became horrifyingly aware of everybody in the room still looking at them. It made the skin on the back of his neck crawl.
Mycroft smiled. "I think it's time I took my prize out of here. Don't worry, your colleague, D.I. Gregson, is about to give us a diversion."
"He is?"
"He's choking on a dry roasted peanut he inhaled when I kissed you."
There was a sudden urgent shout from the bar.
"Shall we?" Mycroft flicked his umbrella up into his hand with his foot and ushered Lestrade out to the waiting car. "I'm looking forward to a prompt return on my investment."
Lestrade smiled broadly and Mycroft decided that alone was worth every penny...
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I was sorely tempted to make it not an established relationship but then I suspect poor ol' Lestrade would've freaked out a bit at that!
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Anyhoo, thanks again for filling this. I am grinning like a cat which has the cream (or a Mycroft who has Lestrade) XD
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"thinking-he's-not-so-totally-hot-eyecandy-Lestrade
Yep - Moffat's comments on the DVD seemed really fitting - Lestrade has no idea how hot he is. Fortunately he has us (and Mycroft) to persuade him!
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And yeah, Gregson was asking for it. His little joke backfired a bit as did his peanut. Lucky for him Mycroft will be distracted for the next wee while and in the mood for something other than revenge...
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That was awesome. Simply brilliant and funny and rather delicious too. Would love to know what happens in the car :)
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I know what I like to think happens... Lestrade'll have to be very careful he doesn't lose that bow-tie... ;)
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