It's a little too late in the year to have SAD
I remember a time in college when I was like this. During the winter months, specifically January to March, I became a hermit. I probably blamed the weather. Or Seasonal Affective Disorder. But whatever it was, I embraced it.
That semester I became crazy with being clean, and being ahead in all of my classes. I came home everyday and picked up around the room, took a shower, and then sat at my computer, put on Elton John or Billy Joel, and began to work. My work and my reclusiveness consumed me. Whereas I began as simply wanting to be caught up with my work, in the end if I was not at least a week ahead in each class, I felt behind. But I felt great. I felt organized and in control, and I loved my life.
Only a few months later I was diagnosed with OCD.
Over the last few years, I have embraced some natural techniques for handling my quirky urges and strange compulsions.
When I was prescribed Zoloft, I was informed of its multi-tasking abilities. Not only was it an anxiety alleviator, but it is also used to curb obsessive tendencies.
Four weeks ago my doctor switched my meds in an attempt to bring back my sex drive. I had almost forgotten about my lack of desire to be touched or to touch myself when he suggested the switch due to frequent complaints by the ladies and their spouses.
I agreed, if for no other reason than to try another new drug, without any thought of the possible negative side effects of this switch. But now I think I found one.
These new happy pills are not prescribed to treat obsessive tendencies. And although I might once have had a natural hold on my sanity, I am afraid that I discarded that along with my sex drive over one year ago. I feel the reclusiveness, and the extreme attention to detail, and the need to have my room clean, and my bed made, taking over my every thought. I want to make more seating charts and more lesson plans, and watch more movies than ever before. And a large part of me feels that there is nothing wrong with this.
A huge part of me feels really happy.
So while I try to muster up some desire to go out in public over the weekend, I'll straighten up my room for the night with a smile and think of the movies that I want to rent this weekend. 200 movies in 2005? I think I can do it :)
That semester I became crazy with being clean, and being ahead in all of my classes. I came home everyday and picked up around the room, took a shower, and then sat at my computer, put on Elton John or Billy Joel, and began to work. My work and my reclusiveness consumed me. Whereas I began as simply wanting to be caught up with my work, in the end if I was not at least a week ahead in each class, I felt behind. But I felt great. I felt organized and in control, and I loved my life.
Only a few months later I was diagnosed with OCD.
Over the last few years, I have embraced some natural techniques for handling my quirky urges and strange compulsions.
When I was prescribed Zoloft, I was informed of its multi-tasking abilities. Not only was it an anxiety alleviator, but it is also used to curb obsessive tendencies.
Four weeks ago my doctor switched my meds in an attempt to bring back my sex drive. I had almost forgotten about my lack of desire to be touched or to touch myself when he suggested the switch due to frequent complaints by the ladies and their spouses.
I agreed, if for no other reason than to try another new drug, without any thought of the possible negative side effects of this switch. But now I think I found one.
These new happy pills are not prescribed to treat obsessive tendencies. And although I might once have had a natural hold on my sanity, I am afraid that I discarded that along with my sex drive over one year ago. I feel the reclusiveness, and the extreme attention to detail, and the need to have my room clean, and my bed made, taking over my every thought. I want to make more seating charts and more lesson plans, and watch more movies than ever before. And a large part of me feels that there is nothing wrong with this.
A huge part of me feels really happy.
So while I try to muster up some desire to go out in public over the weekend, I'll straighten up my room for the night with a smile and think of the movies that I want to rent this weekend. 200 movies in 2005? I think I can do it :)