so_________________
um. woo hoo.
I was so much more excited about this
before my day turned into shit.
I really am excited for the concert.
But I'm at such a low right now.
we watched a video in health today about suicide.
We aren't done with it yet though.
I just can't imagine what it would be like to lose your child like that.
& to be those officers who have to break the news to the unnexpecting mother, or father.
I hate watching sad videos in school because I always cry and then I can hear people laugh at me.
Sometimes I still wonder what it would be like if I did die though.
If everyone would be better off without my outbursts of emotional breakage.
better off without my bitchiness, overall unatractiveness, annoyance.
better off without me.
If anyone would attend my funeral. And then go and forget about it a week later.
If anyone would really care.
& how my parents would feel.
I honestly don't think my dad would care. I'm not even streching to say that.
My mom might. I heard the mom always cares more than the dad.
Eventually though, I know they'd get over it.
I don't help around the house. I'm just a fat blob taking their money and food.
and space.
I hate how I talk like this.
But I hate more how I mean it.
EDIT;
pictures from today;
I didn't take these pictures.
And I don't know who did.
I think Shya though, because I think that's her lip.
This is what I did in journalism.
that is all.