Season of change...
One week from tonight, I will graduate! I can't believe it's finally here. It's been a long 3 years. I've been "done" since last Saturday. I feel like a weight has been lifted from me. Man, the first year and half were the hardest. Before I remarried. Raising two kids, working, and going to school sucked. But I have no regrets. But there were times I just wanted to quit.
I assume most people don't regret getting an education. And I know that getting a Masters is not really a big deal anymore. But this one is different, this one is special. Most people don't have a blind kid. And the ones that do, don't pursue an education in TSVI to learn braille and the many other aspects of being blind and visually impaired. How many parents know braille? How many parents can help their blind child with reading and other homework. Isn't it "the schools duty", to teach their child. Free and Appropriate Public Education (FAPE)is the law, right? But we all know that is idealistic, don't we? Schools are having trouble teaching our "normal" students. And the poor blind kids, they account for less that 1% of the student population. Who'll notice? "Can't they just live off SSI?" Over my dead body. Not Parker. So, the ball is back in my court.
I'm proud of my choices as of late. I know you shouldn't be proud of doing what's right, but, I don't always do what is right. I don't always make the sacrifices. I don't always go the extra mile. I don't always take the long hard road. But this time I did. This time it REALLY counted. And this time, I'm proud of my choices.
I've made SO many bad, selfish, instant gratifying, decisions in my life. What changed? What's the controlling factor? Kids. Kids make us better people. Kids make us question ourselves and our decisions. After kids, we have to carefully consider our choices. For the first time in my life I didn't base a decision on how it affected me. It was time for me to shape up.
So this degree is not only a (very small) grade increase, or some accomplishment, but evidence that I have finally arrived. That I finally "get it". That I've grown up.
I thank my daughter. I thank them both. I wouldn't nor couldn't be who I am without them. They are the only people walking this Earth that could devastate me. I hope that they will someday know, how they raised me while I was raising them. And I also hope that they will know that I'm human, that I make and have made mistakes, but I that love them so. God, I love them so.
I assume most people don't regret getting an education. And I know that getting a Masters is not really a big deal anymore. But this one is different, this one is special. Most people don't have a blind kid. And the ones that do, don't pursue an education in TSVI to learn braille and the many other aspects of being blind and visually impaired. How many parents know braille? How many parents can help their blind child with reading and other homework. Isn't it "the schools duty", to teach their child. Free and Appropriate Public Education (FAPE)is the law, right? But we all know that is idealistic, don't we? Schools are having trouble teaching our "normal" students. And the poor blind kids, they account for less that 1% of the student population. Who'll notice? "Can't they just live off SSI?" Over my dead body. Not Parker. So, the ball is back in my court.
I'm proud of my choices as of late. I know you shouldn't be proud of doing what's right, but, I don't always do what is right. I don't always make the sacrifices. I don't always go the extra mile. I don't always take the long hard road. But this time I did. This time it REALLY counted. And this time, I'm proud of my choices.
I've made SO many bad, selfish, instant gratifying, decisions in my life. What changed? What's the controlling factor? Kids. Kids make us better people. Kids make us question ourselves and our decisions. After kids, we have to carefully consider our choices. For the first time in my life I didn't base a decision on how it affected me. It was time for me to shape up.
So this degree is not only a (very small) grade increase, or some accomplishment, but evidence that I have finally arrived. That I finally "get it". That I've grown up.
I thank my daughter. I thank them both. I wouldn't nor couldn't be who I am without them. They are the only people walking this Earth that could devastate me. I hope that they will someday know, how they raised me while I was raising them. And I also hope that they will know that I'm human, that I make and have made mistakes, but I that love them so. God, I love them so.