Coop's Kin
Coop’s kin
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She heard threw precise knocks and paused, waiting to hear her name followed by another three. Instead there was silence. Shaking off the illogical frown, she opened her front door with a confused smile.
There were two teenagers. The girl looked to be about 16 - she looked familiar; with blond hair, blue eyes, and a determined expression. The boy, on the other hand, looked terrified. He was clutched onto the girls arm as if trying to pull away, and his blue eyes had the pupil so dilated, it was shocking. When Penny spoke, he winced as though expecting himself to turn into a pile of ash.
“Can I help you kids?”
“Hi. I’m Melanie Cooper, and this is my brother Ralph. We’re Coop’s kids and we were wondering if you knew where our uncle Sheldon lives? Coop got into some trouble, so he had to go away for awhile and send us here.” She paused, “He, uh, forgot to call Uncle Sheldon, or tell us where he lives.”
“Or tell him we exist.” Added Ralph in an irritated tone. Melanie shot him a glare and elbowed him heavily in the stomach.
“Oh, sure honey - he lives right across the hall, come on.” She led the way, knocking lightly on the door. Behind her, she heard frantic whispering and angry tones, but when she turned around both straightened, looked at her, and smiled. Without the terrified expression, Ralph looked around the same age as his sister - though the two looked similar they had opposite coloring, his floppy hair was a dark brown and was accented by green eyes.
“Door’s open!” Leonard’s familiar voice called, and Penny walked in, motioning the kids to follow her. The man squinted at her in confusion for a moment, “Penny, who’re these?”
“Sheldon’s niece and nephew.” Penny said, nodding to each of them in turn.
“Don’t be ridiculous Penny, neither Missy nor my brother have produced any offspring. Furthermore, so long ago as to be standing there as teenagers.”
“Yeah, because you’ve talked to him in 16 years.” The boy scoffed in a tone that reminded Penny eerily of Sheldon. She made a mental note to avoid meeting Sheldon’s brother.
Sheldon turned from his desk chair for the first time and peered at them carefully. Ralph tensed again, though he was evidentially trying to avoid the same terrified expression in the face of his uncle.
“You two do bear a resemblance to the Cooper family.” He said, though his tone was still doubtful.
“Sheldon sweetie, who would lie about being related to you?”
“I’m Melanie,” the girl introduced again, “this is Ralph.” She smiled brightly at Sheldon as he looked at the two like they were equations.
“Alright,” he said simply, turning back to his computer, “we don’t have spare room, one of you will sleep on the floor.”
Melanie looked at her brother expectantly.
“What?” he asked, seeing her look. She raised an eyebrow, “What? Oh no. I am not sleeping on the floor!”
“I’ m a lady!” she whispered back in an irritated tone.
“Please, I’m more of a lady than you are.” He said, rolling his eyes.
“Oh, grow up and sleep on the floor like a man.”
“I’m older than you!”
“Yeah, by like five minutes. And that’s all the more reason to let me sleep on the couch.”
“Oh, come on - the floor is really hard! You know with my exceptional height I’m prone to back problems.” The girl rolled her eyes in response.
“You are more of a lady than I am.” She snarked. The boy glowered.
“Uh, guys?” Penny said, cutting into their quiet battle, “One of you can just sleep on my couch?”
The two turned back to one another and seemed to be having another fight - this one in their heads. After a minute, they both turned back to her.
“It’s fine, I can sleep on the floor.” Ralph said in a nonchalant tone - his earlier objections apparently forgotten.
“Yeah, we really prefer to stick together in unfamiliar places.” His sister agreed.
“Don’t be foolish.” Sheldon voiced, “It’s a decent solution. While Penny’s apartment may be tragically arry, it is clean if not organized - and if you really do have back problems, Ralph, it would probably be best for you to have a softer surface to sleep on.”
He said all this while typing, and Penny off-handly wondered if he accidentally did that thing where you were typing and talking but accidentally typed what you said instead of what you were thinking. Probably not, she decided, after he didn’t attack the backspace key.
“Yeah, so great! Melanie, do you have a bag or something?”
“No, ah…” she paused, sharing another glance with her brother,
“The airline lost them.” He supplied with a shrug.
“And for whatever reason, our credit card isn’t working.” The girl added, “we’re kinda screwed.” Her brother elbowed her, “I mean, out of luck?”
“Oh, don’t worry - you can borrow something of mine tomorrow.” Penny said with a sympathetic smile.
“Thanks so much… Penny?” Penny nodded, “Yeah, our Dad should be here to get us soon - maybe even tomorrow - ”
“Doubtful.” Ralph muttered under his breath.
“ - so we shouldn’t be in your hair too long.” Melanie finished, as though her brother hadn’t said anything.
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That night, Sheldon got up to get a glass of warm milk. For whatever reason, he was having trouble getting to a full sleep. He paused in the hallway as he realized that the girl had crept over to talk to her brother in the night. Both were sitting on the two spots on the couch that were not his own.
“What are you wearing?” Ralph’s voice whispered in alarm. Melanie glanced down at her attire - Penny had leant her a tanktop and shorts to sleep in.
“Pajamas?” she replied.
“You look like a slut.” Ralph muttered. Apparently, Sheldon noted, he had inherited Coop’s irritability at night.
“Brat,” Melanie muttered, “I bet this is the sort of thing Daisy wears to bed. Are you going to call her a slut?” her voice took on a teasing tone - not unlike Missy or Penny. Must be a female thing.
“Well now I’ll know neither, thanks to you.” Ralph replied.
“You really gotta let that go.” Melanie said.
“Dad told you not to touch it.”
“Oh come on! He wanted to test it, and he knows us. By telling me not to touch it, he was asking me to touch it.”
‘Then why hasn’t he come to get us yet?” Ralph snapped, “I’ll tell you why - because he’s teaching us a lesson.”
“Or because he has good memories of us visiting! Maybe we’re supposed to be here.”
“Or because he doesn’t want everyone here to see him, which is why we shouldn’t have come here!”
“Where else were we supposed to go?”
“What about to Grandma?”
“Yes, because Gram would totally be down with the situation.”
“Hey, you’ve heard all the stories about all the crap Dad pulled back in the day, she’d understand.”
“Okay, then how about the point that we have no way in which to get into contact with her and the fact that we’re HERE with no money to get THERE anyway?”
“… that’s true.”
“Thank-You.”
“Well, okay. How about Raj? He’s his partner - maybe they’re working on it now.” How did these teens know Raj? He hadn’t been there earlier.
“Raj? Are you kidding. He probably can’t even talk to women yet, what good would that do?”
“Dad probably would mind revealing himself to him less than to everybody else.” Ralph said in a superior tone.
“That’s… probably true.” The girl muttered.
“Yeah, well, it’s probably too late now.”
“Would you chill. For all we know, this totally happened before and Dad was expecting it when he told us not to touch it.” Melanie snapped.
“Or maybe you screwed up out entire lives and we’ll never be born.”
“We’re here, aren’t we?”
“Or maybe you’ve put us into an endless loop where we disappear from our futures at the age of 15, never to return again because we’re here and I never get to pass geometry and prove to Dad that I’m not a failure!” Ralph’s voice grew louder as he spoke, going from a quiet muttering to a loud whisper.
“Nate, you’re not a failure - you’re just a savant in the arts rather than in the sciences.” Melanie said, touching his arm softly, “It’s not a big deal.”
“It is a big deal, Mel. You saw Dad’s face when he found the poems!”
“Yeah, I know, but he was probably just shocked because you never gave any sign before, he thinks you really like math and science, if you were just honest with him - “
“What do you know? You passed Calc. freshman year - Dad loves you.”
“Dad loves you too!” Melanie insisted, her voice a loud whisper, “He just doesn’t know what’s going on in your life - you just need to talk to him.”
“He won’t understand.”
“He loves Mom - she doesn’t understand calculus!”
“Mel, just leave it okay? We have other stuff to worry about.”
“But Nate - “
“No. Look, what are we going to do?”
“Just try to blend in until Dad comes and gets us.” The blond girl replied with a shrug, “It’ll probably be fun.”
“Fun?” the boy hissed, “Yeah, it’ll be a laugh-riot erasing ourselves from existence.”
“That wouldn’t be fun even if it were wha - oh, sarcasm.” Mel trailed off.
“Just go back now, we’ll figure something out by morning.” Ralph said. Mel stood.
“Sleep tight, bro.” she said before she left.
“You too, Mellie.” He replied before sinking to lay back on the couch - his head away from the door, naturally.
It took a few minutes before Sheldon moved from his spot. He stood there frozen as his brain wrapped itself around the information he heard and observed it. It wasn’t as though there were many possibilities that could have been reached - just the one conclusion. What his brain was working on was the How of the situation, and what to do about it.
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“Hey guys.”
“Hello Raj, Howard.” Sheldon acknowledged. Leonard was making something in the kitchen. On the couch, Ralph sat on the armchair, tapping his fingers on his knees awkwardly. Melanie was surveying the equations written on Leonard’s board with a tilted head. She had just grabbed a marker when her brother jumped up and grabbed her arm.
“Melanie, don’t touch that nice man’s equations.” He growled.
“But it’s - “ she started to say.
“Something that is done? I’d agree.” Her brother interrupted. Melanie glared but put the marker back down.
Raj squeaked and leaned in to whisper something in Howard’s ear. In response, Howard turned to stare at his best friend looking confused.
“Did you have more pot cookies or something? I think we’d know if Sheldon had kids.” Raj gesticulated wildly, but Howard waved him off.
“These are Melanie and Ralph, my brother’s children.” Sheldon offered, still not looking up from his computer. Howard turned back to Raj.
“See?”
“Hello Howard, Raj.” Ralph offered.
“He heard Sheldo - would you calm down!” Howard exclaimed as Raj once again tried to whisper something in his ear.
Melanie and Ralph shared a slightly worried look.
“Sheldon, what are you even doing? This isn’t even a work hour.” Leonard voiced from the kitchen.
“I decided to write a bit of poetry.”
“Poetry?” everyone in the room looked a bit dumbstruck, none more than Ralph - who actually looked a little pale.
“Yes,” Sheldon said, looking unaffected, “but I can’t seem to pick up the knack. I was thinking Haikus would be easier, but they don’t seem to make as much sense.”
“You don’t really have a literary mind,” Melanie offered, flopping onto the couch with zeal. She paused, her eyes going wide, “I mean, Daddy always said you had the brains of a genius but the heart of an… angry… raccoon…”
“Who couldn’t read!” Ralph added.
“Yeah, and that!” Melanie agreed.
Shortly there after, Penny let herself into the apartment. She was wearing a t-shirt, a pair of asics, and a pair of shorts that Howard leered at until Raj elbowed him in the kidney(he actually had to bend down to do so).
“You ready, lanky?” she asked, directing the question at Sheldon.
“Oh I’m sorry Penny, I meant to tell you that I wanted to start next week. I’m actually doing something I’d rather be doing.” Sheldon said, his voice going high.
“What are you doing?” Penny asked, tilting her head.
“Her blond hair is long / In a ponytail it hangs / Running is her task.” Sheldon offered. The room was silent, each person staring at him as though he’d grown an extra head. The quiet was broken by a laugh from Ralph - it was a tight, breathy noise that slowly grew more boisterous. It made Penny smile. Sheldon looked miffed, “All of the syllables were correct!”
“No, no - it was good, really.” Ralph said, holding up his arms, “It’s just, I guess, odd to hear you say a poem.”
“Because of the Opossum thing.” Melanie added.
“Racoon.”
“Right.”
“You know Penny, I’m up for a jog if you still want company.” Mel offered, turning to her, “we can leave the boys here with their words.”
“Sure, that sounds like fun!” Penny said with a smile.
“Yeah, we’ll catch you guys at the bakery in 15.” Leonard said, moving from the kitchen to his room. The two blonds shot him eerily-identical glares.
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“I still don’t see why you laughed.” Sheldon muttered to Ralph as he typed.
“It’s just… poetry and words, they’re all about emotion. Not just putting words in a pattern, you know?”
“… no.” Sheldon said, offering a small smile, “I was never really one for writing. Or emotions for that matter.” He paused, “I always really admired those who could craft their words as such.” He went back to typing, but could feel Ralph’s gaze on the back of his neck.
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Sheldon awoke again, and walked to the livingroom. He wasn’t sure why, but he had a feeling that was a tie between fear and anticipation. Sure enough, he saw through the front door, Ralph and Melanie talking to a tall man with brown hair - going a bit grey in the back.
Melanie saw current-Sheldon through the doorway first and froze. Seeing her gaze, future-Sheldon turned. The two locked eyes. Future-Sheldon turned briefly back to his kids.
“Melanie, Nathaniel, wait here.” He walked into the room to meet with Sheldon.
“Hello.” Current-Sheldon greeted him warily.
“Hello.” Future-Sheldon replied with an easy smile, “Don’t look so terrified - I’m you.”
“This doesn’t make any sense, if we’re meeting shouldn’t the world be being torn apart at this very moment?” Future-Sheldon let out a familiar choked laugh at his past-selves concerns.
“No, you won’t even remember this in the morning. Just that Coop came for his kids and disappeared into the night.” Future-Sheldon told him.
“So I won’t remember - “
“Until someone…” future-Sheldon’s gaze glared toward the door, “messed with the device. You’ll remember then.” Current-Sheldon eyed him warily, but then his eyes flashed between the door and his future-self.
“But, Ralph. I didn’t - “
“It’s fine. I can handle it from here.” Future-Sheldon replied, glancing with another smile at the door and shaking his head, “I just wish I’d seen it earlier that I remembered.”
“But - “
“Having an eidetic memory means nothing when dealing with time travel.” Future-Sheldon told him, “That’s why time travel is more of a moot concept.”
“Will you - “
“Remember? Yes. As will Melanie and Nathaniel.”
“But who - “ future-Sheldon leveled him with a glare that current-Sheldon did not appreciate being turned back on him.
“You know very well that I can’t tell you that.”
“I would normally agree with you, but if I am going to forget anyway, I see no reason why you couldn’t tell me.” Current-Sheldon said, drawing himself to stand taller, if that were even possible. Future Sheldon smiled again, it was a bit odd to see an unfamiliar smile on an older version of himself.
“Sheldon, you have an IQ of 187. Surely you don’t need my assistance to tell you something you already know.” Future Seldon said, “Since my customary farewell would appear oddly self-serving, I shall simply say good luck.”
“Are you sure you are me?” Sheldon asked, wrinkling his nose. Future-Sheldon laughed.
“Comic-Con 2012.” He said simply before walking out the door.
“Bye Dad!” two voices called from the hallway. Sheldon paled, and sat stiffly on his cushion as the door closed. He went deep into thought, and didn’t even hear the tell-tale sounds of an elevator opening and closing.
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“Shel - SHELDON!” Penny exclaimed, grabbing his arm. He started.
“Danger! Danger!” He looked around, “Why…”
“You fell asleep on the couch, I guess. Where are Melanie and Ralph?”
“Their father came to get them, “ Sheldon told her, “and Ralph’s name was actually Nathaniel, I believe Melanie was pulling a Bazinga.”
“Oh.” Penny said. She looked - Sheldon was pretty sure - sad, “They could’ve said goodbye.”
“It was important.” Sheldon said with a shrug.
Within two days, everyone had forgotten the twins’ names.
Within three, why they there there.
Within five, that they were there at all.
It wasn’t until about 18 years later that a few familiar faces were in a lab.
“Melanie Cooper, you step away from that device!” Sheldon’t voice snapped. Melanie leapt back from the small romote device, holding up her hands as though in surrender.
“It took forever for us to convince Dad to let us watch, do you have to mess with everything?” Nate hissed at her. Melanie glared at him and started exploring the room. There was a large box - like a random elevator car in the middle of the room. Nate followed her.
“Would you calm down? This is so cool! Time travel!” Melanie crowed back at him.
“Yeah, time travel that doesn’t do anything.”
“Well, not for the past. But we can observe, that’s pretty cool.” She argued. She peered inside the car.
“Well I guess. What are you doing?”
“Woah, I think this is from the old building! Nate, come check this out!” she said. Nate followed her into the car.
“Why is the little wheeled camera in here?” he asked, bending down to look at it.
"MELANIE, NATHANIEL, GET - “ they started as they heard their father’s voice yell, but grabbed one another as everything got really bright and then really dark.
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She heard threw precise knocks and paused, waiting to hear her name followed by another three. Instead there was silence…
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A/N: This was actually a lot longer than I thought it was going to be. Ahwell, just a random ficlit that was sitting in my brain for awhile. I hope you enjoyed it!