Bitchings and Musings
Before you read this keep in mind I was blindly ranting, and did not proofread, so therefor...there are several types and misspellings. Yes, Im away of It. Im too lazy to fix it...so all you get is this sentence. There. Take That!!! :-p
Ah...where to start....bitching or musing. Hmmm...
Well...now since Im gettin fired up thinking about it....how about BITCHING!!! lol
So....right now Im workin in retail....(and we all know how frustrating that is...) Ive got some really annoying customers at work every day. Now...San Francisco is definitely a melting pot of cultures.....and my store is no different. At our work location we have a high Asian population, which for my cultural leanings.... is both good and bad. I've often enjoyed chatting with many of my customers about tcm/acupuncture, massage, natural healing, and feng shui, as well as meditation etc...which is totally awesome! In general most of our customers are pretty decent people that I enjoy assisting.
However...there are some cultural things that really annoy me. I know I should be more openminded and accepting of cultural differences, but being that I came from a different culture, I have some trouble with a few things. The first thing that really bugged me when i started working there, was that the most common word known to our customers was DISCOUNT. 99% of our customers....when asking the price of something.....almost the first thing out of their moulths is....*Do you give a discount?*. Its that word specifically too. Discount. Not Sale, special, price reduction, promotion, coupon, etc...no..its ALWAYS Discount! Said with much zeal (and often laughter.) Now...that doesnt bother me so much anymore...because hey...in this economy its pretty smart to ask if there are any sales or promotions going on. I actually tried the approach myself at a wig shop and saved a couple bucks. Not bad. HOwever....what does start to get annoying is the veracity at which the question is repeated. Its not often just the once...Are there any discounts? etc.... The same question, or variations of such are oft repeated over and over again, as if somehow by repeating themeselves over and over again, we're going to magically agree with them and change our answer...like were some open air flea market vendor...or mom and pop shop. Were a big national corporation with set prices.....and It gets really annoying. Besides the discount question were often asked *If I buy 2, is the 3rd free or the 2nd one discounted?*. Mind you, this is after Ive already stated that there are no sales and promotions at this current time on the product in question. The repetition thing isnt just on potential discounts either....for instance...just yesterday a customer asked me a question on a product, that I gave her the answer to. It was a straight forward question with a straight forward answer. Over the next 2 minutes the same question was repeated again, word for word. After the 3rd time (and getting really annoyed) I politely told the customer the answer again, and reminded them that I had already answered the same question 3 times, and that my answer was not going to change. She said *I just wanted to make sure*. Now...I dont get this. I mean...I totally get the asking for a sale thing....but the repeating thing I just dont understand. Now...if the person didnt speak clear english and they werent sure what they were hearing....thats understandable of course....but most of the time this is with customers who have no problem hearing and understanding everything else said...so I just dont get it. Does anyone have an answer for this? Is it some kind of thing where they think that if the question is repeated that the answer is going to change if asked enough times??? I mean....most of the questions arent on anything super important. Its not like someone is asking something completely unbelievable...like say....when the light bulb was invented and a person might have asked *Wow...does it really light the room, with no fire? and last for hours?) etc...
Just plain every day simple questions with simple answers. Ok...so now Im being redundant.
Anyways....
So...another thing thats really annoying (I preface this with the annoying part being more about the duties we have at work..than the customers...) We have to aggressively sell things to people. Now...I understand most people dont like this (myself included....and I hate doing it too) but...when someone enters the store we have to green them....say hello...ask if they need help finding anything etc....and many of our customers COMPLETELY IGNORE US. They dont even acknowledge our existence. I mean...most people will at least say....no thank you, or smile or give SOME sort of acknowlegment that youre talking to them....but some of our customers act completely oblivious! These are not, once again...non-english speaking customers (most of those customers give a hearty smile and wave....and we understand. No...these customers understand perfect english...and are often people who have lived in the bay area for decades. Its REALLY frustrating....first of all, that we have to do this at all...then get completely ignored for our efforts. I know its nothing personal, but its still annoying!
My solution is to simply stand close to the customers and walk in front of them and make eye contact and repeat my greeting. That usually works....of I get a rude grumble and more avoidance. A simple no thank you would suffice! Most tho...will at that point say no thank you, or ask a question. In fact...most of our customers (and I do understand this) automatically say no thanks....if we ask if they need any assistance....but most literally turn around a second after saying no...and then ask you a question. I understand the auto defense mechanism but Im still annoyed by it. This is a common cultural thing across many cultures Ive found.
So.... yeah.
Dammit...all this bitching and I forgot what I was gonna muse about! thats what I get for being bitchy!
And that calls for more bitching, after bithing about bitching!
Onto the even more superficial shallow part of my bitching rant.
Onto another subject. Skinny girl jeans...and the guys that wear them. I swear Im not trying to sound like a valley girl when I say this...but....EW. As many of you know...Im all for genderfucking, gender fluidity, cross dressing, drag etc....but I simply cannot reconcile skinny girl jeans on guys. Sorry, I just cant. First of all...most of the guys that wear them...albeit skinny, simply do not look good in them. They have no ass...and wearing these tight jeans doesnt help to show off this lack of curves. Even IF the guy has a nice ass...the cut of these jeans has a really great way of making the ass completely unflattering and flat looking. If this wasnt bad enough....these guys actually sag them too. (which brings on a whole nother subject!!1) OOOHHHHHH and dont even get me started on skinny girl coolats, or skinny girl capri pants on guys! UGH!!! NOT FLATTERING!
So...yes...now onto sagging pants. Now....when the trend first started making big appearances back int he early 90's I thought it was kinda cool. Hot guys sagged their pants down an inch...showing off their cute underwear waistbands...kinda sexy and teasing. That I liked. Then the sag got farther and farther and farther....Now I see guys....I shit you not (yes...i just hickily said shit you not...) sag their fucking pants down to their knees! I mean...really...whats the point of wearing pants at all? I mean really? I mean...once the pants are sagged down past the ass, why even bother? Going back to bringing work into the subject, often these guys come into our store.....and test our our stores products...sitting down on our furniture...basically in their underwear (which also..is often barely up as it is...) The next big thing is going to be sagging pants AND underwear and just let your whole bare ass hang out. THese people press their nearly or bare asscracks into our chairs....
Gross. Not sanitary. And having been a massage therapist for a few years, and touching many asses professionally and non professionally I can say with 100 percent confidence....call me a man hater if you will...but MOST MEN DONT KNOW HOW TO WIPE OR WASH THEIR ASS! They probably just do a quick swipe of a dry wipe and thats it. Ive now started using babywipes in conjuction with toiletpaper because I realized how much the dry tp misses! On top of that...these guys probably dont know how to properly wash their asses in the shower either. Now..if Im going to be going down on someone, or going anywhere near their ass...I want it to be clean! The last thing I want.....as Im licking some sweaty balls...is to have a dingle berry fly out at my face...or smell the stench of lingering shit smell emanating from the crack. So...to solve this...heres Shekinahs simple rules of anal hygiene. First of all...eat a healthy diet. If you only shit once a day or every couple days....theres a problem. (unless of course youre only eating once a day) But yeah....
When you shit....use a babywipe when youre done! AND when you shower...SOAP UP THE BUTT CRACK! SERIOUSLY! And dont just get the outside....go in a little too! Put some soap on your finger and insert it in at least an inch! Move it around. I promise you straight guys....it doesnt make you gay to finger your ass in the shower (and no, it doesnt mean you gay guys are getting off from it) Its just about being clean! Your girl and boyfriends will appreciate it! Trust me! Unless they are into the piggy fetish...but thats a whole other subject Im going to skip over for the day.
Then theres the people who play music on the bus.....out of their cellphones or boomboxes. They dont seem to give a shit that no one around them wants to hear their music...and because most of these people are dressed stereotypically *ghetto* nobody wants to mess with them....even the bus drivers...so no one says anything and the music bullying continues. I dont know whats worse tho...the people that openly do this...or the people who blast music so loud in their headphones that they might as well just be playing it without them. I mean seriously...whats the point of using headphones if everyone can hear the song just as clearly as you can? I know it sounds evil and vindictive, but I take a slight sadistic pleasure knowing that these people will likely go deaf at a young age.
So...after that big roundabout...back to the saggy jeans. I dont know how they stay up. Ive seen all sorts of weird contraptions...ranging from pants sewn directly to underwear to another pear of shorts underneath, or a belt pulled really tight....which seems to inhibit walking ability. Then there are the guys that just hold the pants up...often not by grabbing the sides..but by holding them up by the crotch, just to be rude and pretend it makes them *manly*.
One guy was doing this one day and looking at me all *hard*....and I said....*Whats the matter....is your dick so small that you need to grab your pants there to hold them up...I mean...if it was bigger wouldnt they just hang on it?* LOL Of course this was a guy who was being rude to me and already thoroughly piss me off. And its not meant to be an insult to guys who are small....but rather an insult to the egos of guys like that who THINK they need to be big, to be manly.
sigh.
And the last rant. Whats up with the middle aged asian men and mom jeans who smell like mothballs? I see it every day. Another fashion faux pas. I mean...I dont expect everyone to be perfect...but MOM JEANS???
They look bad enough on...MOMS...let alone middle aged men!
Seriously! Where are these people shopping!!! I want to know..so I can ransack the place...or get them to teach people how to size their pants and find the appropriate fit! NO MOM JEANS....PLEASE! Its almost as bad as the mullet or fanny pack!
And the moth balls...yuck! theyre toxic for you...and we really dont have a big moth problem in SF!!! And there are better things to rid moths from your closet like cedar or essential oils! hell....as awful as I think it is...even febreeze would probably be better to keep them away...and smells slightly less (ok...so a big leap on this once) offensive.
So yes.....this is my big rant for the night. Muse away at it!
Yes...I know...now you all think Im a culturally insensitive agist bitch.
*sticks my tongue out at you*.
theres nothing wrong with making OBSERVATIONS. Nothing is set in stone or claimed as solid truth for any culture, age, style, etc....
So yes.
What do ya think?
Ah...where to start....bitching or musing. Hmmm...
Well...now since Im gettin fired up thinking about it....how about BITCHING!!! lol
So....right now Im workin in retail....(and we all know how frustrating that is...) Ive got some really annoying customers at work every day. Now...San Francisco is definitely a melting pot of cultures.....and my store is no different. At our work location we have a high Asian population, which for my cultural leanings.... is both good and bad. I've often enjoyed chatting with many of my customers about tcm/acupuncture, massage, natural healing, and feng shui, as well as meditation etc...which is totally awesome! In general most of our customers are pretty decent people that I enjoy assisting.
However...there are some cultural things that really annoy me. I know I should be more openminded and accepting of cultural differences, but being that I came from a different culture, I have some trouble with a few things. The first thing that really bugged me when i started working there, was that the most common word known to our customers was DISCOUNT. 99% of our customers....when asking the price of something.....almost the first thing out of their moulths is....*Do you give a discount?*. Its that word specifically too. Discount. Not Sale, special, price reduction, promotion, coupon, etc...no..its ALWAYS Discount! Said with much zeal (and often laughter.) Now...that doesnt bother me so much anymore...because hey...in this economy its pretty smart to ask if there are any sales or promotions going on. I actually tried the approach myself at a wig shop and saved a couple bucks. Not bad. HOwever....what does start to get annoying is the veracity at which the question is repeated. Its not often just the once...Are there any discounts? etc.... The same question, or variations of such are oft repeated over and over again, as if somehow by repeating themeselves over and over again, we're going to magically agree with them and change our answer...like were some open air flea market vendor...or mom and pop shop. Were a big national corporation with set prices.....and It gets really annoying. Besides the discount question were often asked *If I buy 2, is the 3rd free or the 2nd one discounted?*. Mind you, this is after Ive already stated that there are no sales and promotions at this current time on the product in question. The repetition thing isnt just on potential discounts either....for instance...just yesterday a customer asked me a question on a product, that I gave her the answer to. It was a straight forward question with a straight forward answer. Over the next 2 minutes the same question was repeated again, word for word. After the 3rd time (and getting really annoyed) I politely told the customer the answer again, and reminded them that I had already answered the same question 3 times, and that my answer was not going to change. She said *I just wanted to make sure*. Now...I dont get this. I mean...I totally get the asking for a sale thing....but the repeating thing I just dont understand. Now...if the person didnt speak clear english and they werent sure what they were hearing....thats understandable of course....but most of the time this is with customers who have no problem hearing and understanding everything else said...so I just dont get it. Does anyone have an answer for this? Is it some kind of thing where they think that if the question is repeated that the answer is going to change if asked enough times??? I mean....most of the questions arent on anything super important. Its not like someone is asking something completely unbelievable...like say....when the light bulb was invented and a person might have asked *Wow...does it really light the room, with no fire? and last for hours?) etc...
Just plain every day simple questions with simple answers. Ok...so now Im being redundant.
Anyways....
So...another thing thats really annoying (I preface this with the annoying part being more about the duties we have at work..than the customers...) We have to aggressively sell things to people. Now...I understand most people dont like this (myself included....and I hate doing it too) but...when someone enters the store we have to green them....say hello...ask if they need help finding anything etc....and many of our customers COMPLETELY IGNORE US. They dont even acknowledge our existence. I mean...most people will at least say....no thank you, or smile or give SOME sort of acknowlegment that youre talking to them....but some of our customers act completely oblivious! These are not, once again...non-english speaking customers (most of those customers give a hearty smile and wave....and we understand. No...these customers understand perfect english...and are often people who have lived in the bay area for decades. Its REALLY frustrating....first of all, that we have to do this at all...then get completely ignored for our efforts. I know its nothing personal, but its still annoying!
My solution is to simply stand close to the customers and walk in front of them and make eye contact and repeat my greeting. That usually works....of I get a rude grumble and more avoidance. A simple no thank you would suffice! Most tho...will at that point say no thank you, or ask a question. In fact...most of our customers (and I do understand this) automatically say no thanks....if we ask if they need any assistance....but most literally turn around a second after saying no...and then ask you a question. I understand the auto defense mechanism but Im still annoyed by it. This is a common cultural thing across many cultures Ive found.
So.... yeah.
Dammit...all this bitching and I forgot what I was gonna muse about! thats what I get for being bitchy!
And that calls for more bitching, after bithing about bitching!
Onto the even more superficial shallow part of my bitching rant.
Onto another subject. Skinny girl jeans...and the guys that wear them. I swear Im not trying to sound like a valley girl when I say this...but....EW. As many of you know...Im all for genderfucking, gender fluidity, cross dressing, drag etc....but I simply cannot reconcile skinny girl jeans on guys. Sorry, I just cant. First of all...most of the guys that wear them...albeit skinny, simply do not look good in them. They have no ass...and wearing these tight jeans doesnt help to show off this lack of curves. Even IF the guy has a nice ass...the cut of these jeans has a really great way of making the ass completely unflattering and flat looking. If this wasnt bad enough....these guys actually sag them too. (which brings on a whole nother subject!!1) OOOHHHHHH and dont even get me started on skinny girl coolats, or skinny girl capri pants on guys! UGH!!! NOT FLATTERING!
So...yes...now onto sagging pants. Now....when the trend first started making big appearances back int he early 90's I thought it was kinda cool. Hot guys sagged their pants down an inch...showing off their cute underwear waistbands...kinda sexy and teasing. That I liked. Then the sag got farther and farther and farther....Now I see guys....I shit you not (yes...i just hickily said shit you not...) sag their fucking pants down to their knees! I mean...really...whats the point of wearing pants at all? I mean really? I mean...once the pants are sagged down past the ass, why even bother? Going back to bringing work into the subject, often these guys come into our store.....and test our our stores products...sitting down on our furniture...basically in their underwear (which also..is often barely up as it is...) The next big thing is going to be sagging pants AND underwear and just let your whole bare ass hang out. THese people press their nearly or bare asscracks into our chairs....
Gross. Not sanitary. And having been a massage therapist for a few years, and touching many asses professionally and non professionally I can say with 100 percent confidence....call me a man hater if you will...but MOST MEN DONT KNOW HOW TO WIPE OR WASH THEIR ASS! They probably just do a quick swipe of a dry wipe and thats it. Ive now started using babywipes in conjuction with toiletpaper because I realized how much the dry tp misses! On top of that...these guys probably dont know how to properly wash their asses in the shower either. Now..if Im going to be going down on someone, or going anywhere near their ass...I want it to be clean! The last thing I want.....as Im licking some sweaty balls...is to have a dingle berry fly out at my face...or smell the stench of lingering shit smell emanating from the crack. So...to solve this...heres Shekinahs simple rules of anal hygiene. First of all...eat a healthy diet. If you only shit once a day or every couple days....theres a problem. (unless of course youre only eating once a day) But yeah....
When you shit....use a babywipe when youre done! AND when you shower...SOAP UP THE BUTT CRACK! SERIOUSLY! And dont just get the outside....go in a little too! Put some soap on your finger and insert it in at least an inch! Move it around. I promise you straight guys....it doesnt make you gay to finger your ass in the shower (and no, it doesnt mean you gay guys are getting off from it) Its just about being clean! Your girl and boyfriends will appreciate it! Trust me! Unless they are into the piggy fetish...but thats a whole other subject Im going to skip over for the day.
Then theres the people who play music on the bus.....out of their cellphones or boomboxes. They dont seem to give a shit that no one around them wants to hear their music...and because most of these people are dressed stereotypically *ghetto* nobody wants to mess with them....even the bus drivers...so no one says anything and the music bullying continues. I dont know whats worse tho...the people that openly do this...or the people who blast music so loud in their headphones that they might as well just be playing it without them. I mean seriously...whats the point of using headphones if everyone can hear the song just as clearly as you can? I know it sounds evil and vindictive, but I take a slight sadistic pleasure knowing that these people will likely go deaf at a young age.
So...after that big roundabout...back to the saggy jeans. I dont know how they stay up. Ive seen all sorts of weird contraptions...ranging from pants sewn directly to underwear to another pear of shorts underneath, or a belt pulled really tight....which seems to inhibit walking ability. Then there are the guys that just hold the pants up...often not by grabbing the sides..but by holding them up by the crotch, just to be rude and pretend it makes them *manly*.
One guy was doing this one day and looking at me all *hard*....and I said....*Whats the matter....is your dick so small that you need to grab your pants there to hold them up...I mean...if it was bigger wouldnt they just hang on it?* LOL Of course this was a guy who was being rude to me and already thoroughly piss me off. And its not meant to be an insult to guys who are small....but rather an insult to the egos of guys like that who THINK they need to be big, to be manly.
sigh.
And the last rant. Whats up with the middle aged asian men and mom jeans who smell like mothballs? I see it every day. Another fashion faux pas. I mean...I dont expect everyone to be perfect...but MOM JEANS???
They look bad enough on...MOMS...let alone middle aged men!
Seriously! Where are these people shopping!!! I want to know..so I can ransack the place...or get them to teach people how to size their pants and find the appropriate fit! NO MOM JEANS....PLEASE! Its almost as bad as the mullet or fanny pack!
And the moth balls...yuck! theyre toxic for you...and we really dont have a big moth problem in SF!!! And there are better things to rid moths from your closet like cedar or essential oils! hell....as awful as I think it is...even febreeze would probably be better to keep them away...and smells slightly less (ok...so a big leap on this once) offensive.
So yes.....this is my big rant for the night. Muse away at it!
Yes...I know...now you all think Im a culturally insensitive agist bitch.
*sticks my tongue out at you*.
theres nothing wrong with making OBSERVATIONS. Nothing is set in stone or claimed as solid truth for any culture, age, style, etc....
So yes.
What do ya think?