(no subject)
faith died last week, we had the funeral yesterday, now i suppose that part of our lives is over, and we shall all go back to being consumed with how miserable we are. i suppose faith may end up being another excuse for our drukeness, laziness, idleness, selfishness......
i will refuse to be miserable, i am going to try and make this life more about others and less about me. at the funeral, pappa bitched at us because of what our shoes looked like, mom cried because she thought everyone was looking at her, and shannon and allison didnt even say hello, while dad and aunt pat tried to coax me into hiding behind the 13ft marble masoleum to smoke some weed. i wanted to run, scream, fight and cuss all at the same time.
NOW IS NOT THE TIME YOU SONS OF BITCHES, QUIT WORRING ABOUT YOUR DAMNED MISERABLE OPTIONS, TAKE THAT PEICE OF YOU OUT OF YOUR ASS AND GIVE IT SOMEONE ELSE, THEY MIGHT LIKE IT BETTER. IT IS NOT ABOUT YOU, YOU BUNCH OF BASTARDS!!!!
alas, i just sat on the trunk of gma's car and waited for the sons of bitches to quit playing show and smiling for pictures no one was taking.....
have i been reduced to a complainer? partly, however i will do more than yell this time. i will get up, and walk away. i am tired of their bullshit, i am not going to condone it anymore, and i am going to give them something to talk about. perhaps i will die a worn out, unknown philanthropists, however, when i die, it will be said to me: "well done my good and faithfull servant"
anyway, no one is on campus, it is fall break and i decided to come home two days early. i need this time to rest, recover and make up for the two weeks of school that i have missed;-) i need to find a way to deny my self.....
this journal seems so selfish, it's all about me......................................
i will refuse to be miserable, i am going to try and make this life more about others and less about me. at the funeral, pappa bitched at us because of what our shoes looked like, mom cried because she thought everyone was looking at her, and shannon and allison didnt even say hello, while dad and aunt pat tried to coax me into hiding behind the 13ft marble masoleum to smoke some weed. i wanted to run, scream, fight and cuss all at the same time.
NOW IS NOT THE TIME YOU SONS OF BITCHES, QUIT WORRING ABOUT YOUR DAMNED MISERABLE OPTIONS, TAKE THAT PEICE OF YOU OUT OF YOUR ASS AND GIVE IT SOMEONE ELSE, THEY MIGHT LIKE IT BETTER. IT IS NOT ABOUT YOU, YOU BUNCH OF BASTARDS!!!!
alas, i just sat on the trunk of gma's car and waited for the sons of bitches to quit playing show and smiling for pictures no one was taking.....
have i been reduced to a complainer? partly, however i will do more than yell this time. i will get up, and walk away. i am tired of their bullshit, i am not going to condone it anymore, and i am going to give them something to talk about. perhaps i will die a worn out, unknown philanthropists, however, when i die, it will be said to me: "well done my good and faithfull servant"
anyway, no one is on campus, it is fall break and i decided to come home two days early. i need this time to rest, recover and make up for the two weeks of school that i have missed;-) i need to find a way to deny my self.....
this journal seems so selfish, it's all about me......................................