..all i want for christmas is you..
Yeah, it's been a while since I last updated. It always is. Not much has really happened since the last update, just more sadness for me and a few days of reflection.
A year ago today...Well yesterday as of now, I went to Bristol to see the lights at the race track. I know that may not seem like much to some people, but for me it was this was a night that I'll always remember. I was with my favorite family in the world, other than my own, and had the best time. I miss nights like those. I miss seeing that family on a regular basis.
I'm at this point in my life where nothing seems to go my way. I'm alone and depressed and even though I try to act happy, I'm not. I spend more time crying than I do laughing and I know that can't be healthy.
Almost two months ago, I lost the one thing that was keeping me happy. I still don't know what went wrong. I did everything right, I made sure of it; because the last thing I wanted to do was mess such a great thing up. But somehow it still fell apart. What happened to the days when just hearing someone's voice gave me butterflies? It's gone. I can't even look at him now without wanting to cry. My heart's in a million pieces and I'm not sure I'll ever be the same.
The only thing I'm sure of is who my friends are. You learn a lot about who really cares when you're down. My biggest thanks go to Robby Colley, who is always there no matter what, with a positive outlook on things. Jordan who has called to check on me more than once and Amy Raines who can sit and listen to me cry for hours. A few others have been there too and they know who they are. But the ones you always thought you could count on, sometimes only let you down.
On a brighter note, one of my bestest friends in the world had her baby the first of the month. Amy and Jessee welcomed Kinsley Shae into the world on December 3rd. She's absolutely beautiful.
I guess I'd better get myself in the bed, everyone have a wonderful Christmas and Happy New Year.
Until next time...
--Shenna
A year ago today...Well yesterday as of now, I went to Bristol to see the lights at the race track. I know that may not seem like much to some people, but for me it was this was a night that I'll always remember. I was with my favorite family in the world, other than my own, and had the best time. I miss nights like those. I miss seeing that family on a regular basis.
I'm at this point in my life where nothing seems to go my way. I'm alone and depressed and even though I try to act happy, I'm not. I spend more time crying than I do laughing and I know that can't be healthy.
Almost two months ago, I lost the one thing that was keeping me happy. I still don't know what went wrong. I did everything right, I made sure of it; because the last thing I wanted to do was mess such a great thing up. But somehow it still fell apart. What happened to the days when just hearing someone's voice gave me butterflies? It's gone. I can't even look at him now without wanting to cry. My heart's in a million pieces and I'm not sure I'll ever be the same.
The only thing I'm sure of is who my friends are. You learn a lot about who really cares when you're down. My biggest thanks go to Robby Colley, who is always there no matter what, with a positive outlook on things. Jordan who has called to check on me more than once and Amy Raines who can sit and listen to me cry for hours. A few others have been there too and they know who they are. But the ones you always thought you could count on, sometimes only let you down.
On a brighter note, one of my bestest friends in the world had her baby the first of the month. Amy and Jessee welcomed Kinsley Shae into the world on December 3rd. She's absolutely beautiful.
I guess I'd better get myself in the bed, everyone have a wonderful Christmas and Happy New Year.
Until next time...
--Shenna