(no subject)
fuck. i sit home too much. every fucking day im sitting at home watching IFC and jacking off! im a fucking loser. i get blown off too much. what do i do to deserve this? i dont have any friends. why do i search for sympathy in people? maybe because i feel the need to be wanted. no. thats not it. i dont know. i need to change my life around. im living this life too wrong. i feel like i need a reason to turn it around. ive found my considering to do things that ive always despitsed. drinking, smoking, drugs, sex. im holding strong to what i beleive. ive done good. its hard though. i understand where the drug attics and things come from. depression. its horrible.i feel like dieing. well i wouldnt mind. somtimes i wonder... if i were to die today. if anyone would truely care. yea im sure ppl would be like that sucks. but would anyone actually care? i dont think so.