(no subject)
i haven't washed my hair in 3 or 4 days. i never realized how long it was. it's really long, i always have it up. and i like it. so i'm not getting it cut, not anytime soon anyways...or washed...
i wish i was more confident in myself. one of the most important parts of me, i'm insecure about. my creativity. and that's so horrible. especially sense it's going to be what i do for the rest of my life, as of now anyways. i haven't drawn or done anything creative in awhile. my mind is in a block. i can't think straight about anything, there's just so much going on, that i don't have time to myself.
i want to be selfish again.
i want to fill up my sketchbook and my walls of insignificant doodles and words.
i want everything i touch to be a masterpiece.
i want to keep the things i make, instead of trashing them.
i want to have granite all over my hands, and get it all over you.
i want clay, stuck in between my fingers.
i want to have 'unchained melody' on repeat.
i want paint strains on my carpet.
i want my room to smell like bleach.
i want to vacuum up paper clippings, fabric, and any other scraps.
i want my thoughts to just come pouring onto paper, or any surface that can keep up with them.
i want to sew until my fingers bleed.
i want to run around taking a picture of everything my eyes happen to lay on.
i want to drink more water.
i want to miss match.
i want to put on make-up.
i want to braid my hair.
i want to wear skirts with sneakers.
i want to be pretty.
i want to be me again.
i wish i was more confident in myself. one of the most important parts of me, i'm insecure about. my creativity. and that's so horrible. especially sense it's going to be what i do for the rest of my life, as of now anyways. i haven't drawn or done anything creative in awhile. my mind is in a block. i can't think straight about anything, there's just so much going on, that i don't have time to myself.
i want to be selfish again.
i want to fill up my sketchbook and my walls of insignificant doodles and words.
i want everything i touch to be a masterpiece.
i want to keep the things i make, instead of trashing them.
i want to have granite all over my hands, and get it all over you.
i want clay, stuck in between my fingers.
i want to have 'unchained melody' on repeat.
i want paint strains on my carpet.
i want my room to smell like bleach.
i want to vacuum up paper clippings, fabric, and any other scraps.
i want my thoughts to just come pouring onto paper, or any surface that can keep up with them.
i want to sew until my fingers bleed.
i want to run around taking a picture of everything my eyes happen to lay on.
i want to drink more water.
i want to miss match.
i want to put on make-up.
i want to braid my hair.
i want to wear skirts with sneakers.
i want to be pretty.
i want to be me again.