Summer.
It's been 18weeks.
A lot has changed.
Rundown.
I got a job. Hess. It's annoying and I don't like it. But it's my way out of Rochester. I like some of the people I work with too. They seem to be genuine. Whenever I say that, they turn into twofaced people though.
I got a newhome. I love my bed and I try to relax in it as much as I can. I'm imfamous for having sleep problems though.
I got friends. I thought I did until today.
I got money. I thought I did until today.
I got myself. I thought I did until today.
I got over it.
I lost it. I lost it all.
My friends want my money.
My money goes to my friends.
My friends go away faster than the summer breeze.
Summer. Don't leave. Stay for twelve months. I won't miss winter that much anymore.
Summerwind. You keep me moving. You keep me alive.
My illness has been eating away at me lately and ruining beautiful things I had in my life. I become this annoying girl that no one really wants to be around. Not even me.
I think I need to get out of Rochester. Just for one day. Hit my refresh button and come back here just in time so that no one will notice that I left.
He forgave me. But can I forgive myself.
Life just won't do without him. Why do I care so fucking much? It's the same old fucking song and dance. To a tee. Nothing has changed except the face. The look in his eyes, his intentions. It's all the same. It's all driven by one thing. The one thing that I give up faster than I can type this sentence. Faster than I could imagine. I wanted him to be happy. And now life won't do without him. Life has changed without him.
I feel like I'm half the woman that I used to be.
I take the blues to take away the blues. I take the drink so I don't sink. I just don't want to think.
Torn between two. Three. Four. Now call me a whore.
Leave me alone for tonight and by tomorrow I'll be shining bright.
You know this smile I wear is fake. You know that the laugh is uncomfortable. You know these words are just me being afraid. But you don't care. You couldn't fucking care if your life depended on it. I thought I was a good actress. Not this good. Maybe you gave up on me. I never would fucking give up on you. Never.
I give my heart to those who like to stomp on it and push me out of cars.
I'M OVER IT.
I give my life to those who want to end it.
I miss being fucking sixteen. I wasted it with a razorblade and anti-social behavior.
I wasted my life.
You're a fucking waste.
I DON'T WANT TO FEEL THIS WAY FOREVER.
A DEAD LETTER MARKED RETURN TO SENDER.
NO REASON TO COME BACK AGAIN.
IN A CAR CRASH.
A lot has changed.
Rundown.
I got a job. Hess. It's annoying and I don't like it. But it's my way out of Rochester. I like some of the people I work with too. They seem to be genuine. Whenever I say that, they turn into twofaced people though.
I got a newhome. I love my bed and I try to relax in it as much as I can. I'm imfamous for having sleep problems though.
I got friends. I thought I did until today.
I got money. I thought I did until today.
I got myself. I thought I did until today.
I got over it.
I lost it. I lost it all.
My friends want my money.
My money goes to my friends.
My friends go away faster than the summer breeze.
Summer. Don't leave. Stay for twelve months. I won't miss winter that much anymore.
Summerwind. You keep me moving. You keep me alive.
My illness has been eating away at me lately and ruining beautiful things I had in my life. I become this annoying girl that no one really wants to be around. Not even me.
I think I need to get out of Rochester. Just for one day. Hit my refresh button and come back here just in time so that no one will notice that I left.
He forgave me. But can I forgive myself.
Life just won't do without him. Why do I care so fucking much? It's the same old fucking song and dance. To a tee. Nothing has changed except the face. The look in his eyes, his intentions. It's all the same. It's all driven by one thing. The one thing that I give up faster than I can type this sentence. Faster than I could imagine. I wanted him to be happy. And now life won't do without him. Life has changed without him.
I feel like I'm half the woman that I used to be.
I take the blues to take away the blues. I take the drink so I don't sink. I just don't want to think.
Torn between two. Three. Four. Now call me a whore.
Leave me alone for tonight and by tomorrow I'll be shining bright.
You know this smile I wear is fake. You know that the laugh is uncomfortable. You know these words are just me being afraid. But you don't care. You couldn't fucking care if your life depended on it. I thought I was a good actress. Not this good. Maybe you gave up on me. I never would fucking give up on you. Never.
I give my heart to those who like to stomp on it and push me out of cars.
I'M OVER IT.
I give my life to those who want to end it.
I miss being fucking sixteen. I wasted it with a razorblade and anti-social behavior.
I wasted my life.
You're a fucking waste.
I DON'T WANT TO FEEL THIS WAY FOREVER.
A DEAD LETTER MARKED RETURN TO SENDER.
NO REASON TO COME BACK AGAIN.
IN A CAR CRASH.