this town seems hardly worth our time
life in general is all over the place right now. i have never been in a place like this. i don't know which way is up or down anymore. i have so much going on around me, and inside me. but, at the same time, i am the happiest i have ever been in my entire life. i have the most secure, amazing friends. they never faulter. they are my foundation, my rock. as is the same with my family. i have been alone for almost a year now, and i have grown into myself. i know what i'm worth. i know what i want. and i actually think i've found it. my heart is gaining speed again. i shake and my stomach flips. and i've missed it. he is the most beautiful person, and he doesn't realize it. he lights up my face for the world to notice. but where do i want to go with this? freedom suits me beyond how i thought it would. i am fearless. i am fun. i am, in the best most entertaining way possible, completely out of my mind. and i am not entirely sure if i'm ready to release that part of myself. but, i will sit by myself and i feel amost sure that he is the one. and so we've come full circle. what is up? what is down?