(no subject)
FSI Juniors was a... humbling experience. One does not remain comfortably happy with one's current ability after one has been eaten, chewed up and spit out again by a 15-year-old fencer the same height as one is. And by other fencers using French grips... and by short fencers... and by young fencers (but at least never by timid fencers because I tend to scare them by 1. my height and 2. my rushing in and sticking out my arm). That said, defeated, but not depressed. I had a fun turn fencing after the competition with Yingjie and the rest.
I can't help but feel I performed below par. Well, considering 1. how much energy I have and 2. how much training I had and 3. how much available time I have... (1: little 2: little 3: surprisingly, zero!) Uber -_- to have a coach tell you you haven't trained enough, and he's not even my coach. But I know that it's true, so I have nothing to say. If it wasn't true, it'd show on the piste anyway though. Urrrrgh.
I want to fence more, but again there are a number of barriers. 1. Things that take away homework time (Bio, Chem O training and Art - next person who says, "But Art is slack right?" will get something from me), 2. Migraine (Dennis keeps asking me whether I really have to sleep at 10pm -_-) and 3. Scheduling difficulties (don't even go there). Oh well, well, well, well... A youth is a bursting package of potential. Unfortunately I feel like a lot of potential and nothing else. I can't seem to pursue anything to its conclusion. Yet.
I shall make every training count! >|
This blog is more a record of my inner ramblings ("rambling" as in the sense of aimlessly wandering or walking about in a place) than a record of actual events. In fact, this post is actually me trying to weigh certain factors in order to reach a conclusion... and failing. Things will play out to their natural conclusion, I hope...
Back to work! Oh dear, now I prefer taking 2 hours getting to NTU and fencing to going back to school. All the homework awaits me. And PW. Which has been dealt a severe blow.