"life just really sucks right now. the things that make me happy: friends, art, music, singing, people... all these things are what my dad identifies as not being to way to success."
The truth is, everyone has a different definition of success. In culture, we fool one another into believing there is just one template for beauty, wealth, success, religion, etc. For me, happiness is success. Also, I believe that happiness has its foundations in the mind, and not in circumstances.
Try neither to hate your father, nor give into his desires for your life. Understand that he is coaching you based out of an odd fabric woven out of love and fear. It doesn't do well to mix the two, and that is why you both suffer. Distance yourself from him when he is speaking. Look at him and nod to yourself and think "Yes, I see. You are afraid for me. I appreciate that, but I still need to live my life."
You don't need to say that out loud. Don't argue so much yet. Listen. Listen, and keep doing what you want to do. If you are talented in science because of your attention to detail, perhaps a career involving computer graphics would be a way to combine both of your talents. That is NOT me trying to really solve this. It's just one of many examples of things that could combine a few of your abilities.
I should add here that the exceptions to this rule are the following: body chemistry ( though I think that is exacerbated by the rest of this list ) overheating, underfeeding, undersleeping, not enough alone time, general stress that isn't positively addressed.
This is really a much longer dialog than what I can place right here.
The truth is, everyone has a different definition of success. In culture, we fool one another into believing there is just one template for beauty, wealth, success, religion, etc. For me, happiness is success. Also, I believe that happiness has its foundations in the mind, and not in circumstances.
Try neither to hate your father, nor give into his desires for your life. Understand that he is coaching you based out of an odd fabric woven out of love and fear. It doesn't do well to mix the two, and that is why you both suffer. Distance yourself from him when he is speaking. Look at him and nod to yourself and think "Yes, I see. You are afraid for me. I appreciate that, but I still need to live my life."
You don't need to say that out loud. Don't argue so much yet. Listen. Listen, and keep doing what you want to do. If you are talented in science because of your attention to detail, perhaps a career involving computer graphics would be a way to combine both of your talents. That is NOT me trying to really solve this. It's just one of many examples of things that could combine a few of your abilities.
Let's make that date, eh? I love you Claire.
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I should add here that the exceptions to this rule are the following: body chemistry ( though I think that is exacerbated by the rest of this list ) overheating, underfeeding, undersleeping, not enough alone time, general stress that isn't positively addressed.
This is really a much longer dialog than what I can place right here.
Reply
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