(no subject)
man i hate statistics.. i wanna shoot myself in the head... i'm so sick of people.. u think u know someone but u really dont.. dont try to figure them out- u'll never understand... people think all kinds of shit - i hate it.. STOP THINKING IDIOTS.. no really.. just stop thinking and let things be.. i hate it how every1 pretends to fuckin care so damn much- well if u really fucking cared then u'd see the tears i cant shed, u'd hear the cries that i cant scream... dont say u know me.. dont tell me that ur doing this that or the other for MYYYY sake.. u dont know me.. u think u know everything- who gave u that overconfidence mutha fucker? try and figure out ur own damn problems.. get ur fuckin face outta my business and mind ur own- its not like u dont have enough on ur plate.. but u just cant leave shit the way it is.. gotta ruin things as much as possible.. stress urself out in ways that are beyond unnecessary and then u try to justify it by saying that ur LOOKING OUT FOR ME?! hellll naw mutha fucker.. u dont know me... if u knew me u wouldnt be sayin the words ur sayin.. u would look at me in a diff light.. u'd see i'm strong in a weak way, i'm bold in a shy way, i'm happy in a sad way, i'm brave in a fearful way... and that all makes me who i am- if u have a fuckin problem wit it then either LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE to be me or SHOOT URSELF IN THE FACE ORRRRRRR better yet- shoot me cuz i'm sick of hearing ur goddamn whining and crying bout how i need to change.. i'm like a fuckin chameleon mutha fucker.. i change all the damn time- i'll change so fast and such strange ways but instead of seeing the versitility u call me a liar for being one way and adjusting to my surroundings?! mutha fucker who are u to call me a liar?! u dont know me.. maybe i was telling the truth THEN but the truth NOW is different.. and u cant handle the truth.. even if it slapped u in the face u wouldnt believe it... why am i where i am.. who needs me here? not u mutha fucker.. u never needed me here.. not ever.. life is changing so fast around me and ur not here to watch me grow.. u never were there to hold my hand.. left foot, right foot, left, right, left, right.. yes one foot at a time.. there u go... one more step ur almost there.. maybe ur a good person.. maybe ur intentions werent wrong.. but until u REALLY know who someone is u wont be able to help them.. y are u always tryin to help.. who said i need ur help.. my thoughts are a mess its tru.. my soul is only at ease thru chemicals.. life support.. mental life support if u will.. the smile on my face is a mask hiding the monster underneath.. u dont know me.. one day someone will accidently take off my mask... they wont mean to but it'll happen.. maybe u.. then every1 will see me for who i really am.. the thought gives me shivers jus knowing that no one really knows.. even when my thoughts are an open book that u can easily read doesnt mean u know me.. stop trying so hard.. leave the distance.. dont get too close.. i'm simple yet so complicated.. easy to figure out but hard to understand... why cant u just let things be the way i see them.. or can u not see what i see.. hmm.. maybe i'll give up now and go work on stat.. blah