Trichotillomania.
So, I guess you could say I was triggered. Not really, but my memory was, for sure.
You know how sometimes you forget about things? Yeah, until someone posted something on ftm recently about trichotillomania, I had completely forgotten my few months' long obsession with it.
Trichotillomaniacs are people who compulsively remove hair due to anxiety, generally without purpose. Trichsters often have no eyebrows, and bald patches about their bodies, usually focusing on the face and head.
My particular issue wasn't my headhair. It was my pubic hair. I used to, every time I went to the bathroom, pluck hair from my nether regions using either my fingers, or as the hairs got scarcer and scarcer, tweezers. Sometimes I would spend upwards of an hour.
I'd work in patterns. Left side to right, top town, etc. because, since I didn't want anyone to know, I was worried someone might notice I was spending too long in the bathroom, or might question the little hairs everywhere. By the time I finished the pattern, I could start over again.
It was a strange impulse. It wasn't about lack of hair (obviously). It was something to focus on, I guess. I'd like to say it stems from the time my father and his girlfriend told me I needed to shave my pubic hair, because it was "disgusting"... but I'm not sure if that's the reason.
Strange thing is, I don't remember it having hurt. But it had to have hurt, right?
Anyway, I'm not quite sure how I got to be so odd. This, of course, was over a year ago. Strange that my anxiety should manifest in the distruction of my genitalia, eh? O.O
So, yeah. Total TMI... but I remembered, and I remembered being very focused on that. Seems silly now. *shrug*
You know how sometimes you forget about things? Yeah, until someone posted something on ftm recently about trichotillomania, I had completely forgotten my few months' long obsession with it.
Trichotillomaniacs are people who compulsively remove hair due to anxiety, generally without purpose. Trichsters often have no eyebrows, and bald patches about their bodies, usually focusing on the face and head.
My particular issue wasn't my headhair. It was my pubic hair. I used to, every time I went to the bathroom, pluck hair from my nether regions using either my fingers, or as the hairs got scarcer and scarcer, tweezers. Sometimes I would spend upwards of an hour.
I'd work in patterns. Left side to right, top town, etc. because, since I didn't want anyone to know, I was worried someone might notice I was spending too long in the bathroom, or might question the little hairs everywhere. By the time I finished the pattern, I could start over again.
It was a strange impulse. It wasn't about lack of hair (obviously). It was something to focus on, I guess. I'd like to say it stems from the time my father and his girlfriend told me I needed to shave my pubic hair, because it was "disgusting"... but I'm not sure if that's the reason.
Strange thing is, I don't remember it having hurt. But it had to have hurt, right?
Anyway, I'm not quite sure how I got to be so odd. This, of course, was over a year ago. Strange that my anxiety should manifest in the distruction of my genitalia, eh? O.O
So, yeah. Total TMI... but I remembered, and I remembered being very focused on that. Seems silly now. *shrug*