Today, I
kicked my cel phone's ass. With boob sweat. 'Cause I thought that it would be OK to use my sports bra like a pocket on my post-work hike. (God knows there's enough room in there, it's not like my boobs use all that space or anything :p)
So now it doesn't want to dial properly. It's an older phone anyway, so I managed to get "611" entered in and talked to some poor lady at T-Mobile (yes, "poor lady". read on... read on...) about getting a free phone upgrade. My phone was on pretty good behavior until she conference-called some automated thing where I was supposed to enter my phone number and say "yes" to something, at which point the conversation went somewhat like this:
Me: I'm not sure if I can enter my phone number, my phone thinks my finger pushing the button marked "8" means dial "2"!
T-Mobile Lady: Try it. See if it works.
Me: OK
So I press 4 and it does nothing. I press 4 really hard again and my phone dials like, a q or something.
Me: No... it's not really working.
T-mobile lady: Well, I can read-
Phone: BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP
T-Mobile Lady: Hello?
Me: Yeah...
Phone: BEEP
Phone: BEEP
Phone: BEEEEEEEEP BEEP
Me: my phone keeps dialing "4"
T-Mobile Lady: Alright. Well I was reading the agreement to you. If you change your mind within 14 days of receiving the phone-
Phone: BEEP
Me: My phone says "4" again
Phone: BEEP BEEP BEEEP BEEP
ME: It doesn't want stop dialing "4"
Phone: BEEEEP
Me: And now it's dialing.. the plus sign?
Phone: BEEP
Me: And a "w"? How does it dial a "w"?
Phone: BEEEEP BEEEEP BEEEP
Me: But the "w" turned into a "p" and then they both went away and its a bunch of "4"s now...
Phone: BEEPBEEP BEEEP
T-Mobile Lady: Oh no! Well that is funny. Back to the buyer's remorse policy, if you dec-
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP
(long pause)
Me: Hello are you there? Um. That was the star key. It says "hi".
T-Mobile Lady: Haha. That was a really long one!
Me: I thought it gonna be infinite!
T-Mobile Lady: Haha.. it was really long! Well, we're almost done...
Then there was the blah blah crap about what I'm agreeing to, another BEEP or two, and all that, and the call was over. And the screen of my phone afterward looked something like this:
444 444 44444*4444+.44444+444w.44*3pppp*
But it sure sounded a lot worse.
And the moral of the story is: DO NOT FEED PHONES BOOB SWEAT. IT MAKES THEM GO CRAAAAZY!
So now it doesn't want to dial properly. It's an older phone anyway, so I managed to get "611" entered in and talked to some poor lady at T-Mobile (yes, "poor lady". read on... read on...) about getting a free phone upgrade. My phone was on pretty good behavior until she conference-called some automated thing where I was supposed to enter my phone number and say "yes" to something, at which point the conversation went somewhat like this:
Me: I'm not sure if I can enter my phone number, my phone thinks my finger pushing the button marked "8" means dial "2"!
T-Mobile Lady: Try it. See if it works.
Me: OK
So I press 4 and it does nothing. I press 4 really hard again and my phone dials like, a q or something.
Me: No... it's not really working.
T-mobile lady: Well, I can read-
Phone: BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP
T-Mobile Lady: Hello?
Me: Yeah...
Phone: BEEP
Phone: BEEP
Phone: BEEEEEEEEP BEEP
Me: my phone keeps dialing "4"
T-Mobile Lady: Alright. Well I was reading the agreement to you. If you change your mind within 14 days of receiving the phone-
Phone: BEEP
Me: My phone says "4" again
Phone: BEEP BEEP BEEEP BEEP
ME: It doesn't want stop dialing "4"
Phone: BEEEEP
Me: And now it's dialing.. the plus sign?
Phone: BEEP
Me: And a "w"? How does it dial a "w"?
Phone: BEEEEP BEEEEP BEEEP
Me: But the "w" turned into a "p" and then they both went away and its a bunch of "4"s now...
Phone: BEEPBEEP BEEEP
T-Mobile Lady: Oh no! Well that is funny. Back to the buyer's remorse policy, if you dec-
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP
(long pause)
Me: Hello are you there? Um. That was the star key. It says "hi".
T-Mobile Lady: Haha. That was a really long one!
Me: I thought it gonna be infinite!
T-Mobile Lady: Haha.. it was really long! Well, we're almost done...
Then there was the blah blah crap about what I'm agreeing to, another BEEP or two, and all that, and the call was over. And the screen of my phone afterward looked something like this:
444 444 44444*4444+.44444+444w.44*3pppp*
But it sure sounded a lot worse.
And the moral of the story is: DO NOT FEED PHONES BOOB SWEAT. IT MAKES THEM GO CRAAAAZY!