i feel loopy.
but when is that ever news? today nancy was over and i was reading other people's ljs and i realized how unopen i am in this thing. even to myself in private entries. the closest i got was the recent entry about jon. i'm pretty sure i met my openness quota for the month with that one. let's try to talk about emotions now:
i feel loopy. sometimes i wonder how that emotion or word even came about. who came up with it? and how do we know that "loopy" is the same for everyone? most likely it's not. my loopy is different from yours. but. anyway. maybe it's because i'm listening to this song. i like it. i really wish i went to berkeley for undergrad.
ok i suck with talking about my feelings. but i refuse to give up. let me try again.
ever since i graduated in fall, i've been living out of a suitcase (duffel bag). it's kind of cool in a way, but recently i've come to realize that it's a curse. i can't stay in one place for more than two days without feeling the itch to move on to somewhere else. needless to say i've racked up a decent amount of mileage and my gas bills have been a tad bit more than when i actualy had some place to call home. i have no set schedule. no "i go home every weekend" or "i stay in irvine during the week." no set days for here, certain days there. for me, i go where the wind takes me. my job will be that way too. i will never have to stay in one place for more than one day. it's nice to have such freedom but i'm beginning to fear that it's training my attention span to be so short it's becoming unhealthy.
i think that may be a reason i bought that ticket to new york. i'm outgrowing socal and need a change of scenery.
it's gotten to the point where i am even dreaming about a career taking me further than the outskirts of southern california. a career where i can jetset all over the country (or globe!). new york some days. chicago. houston. boston. shanghai. tokyo. hong kong. paris. london. man, how awesome would that be? really living out of a suitcase. no place to call my home. i imagine that sort of life would get lonely, but for me, staying in one place too long is getting lonely. it's like something is always missing.
i feel loopy. sometimes i wonder how that emotion or word even came about. who came up with it? and how do we know that "loopy" is the same for everyone? most likely it's not. my loopy is different from yours. but. anyway. maybe it's because i'm listening to this song. i like it. i really wish i went to berkeley for undergrad.
ok i suck with talking about my feelings. but i refuse to give up. let me try again.
ever since i graduated in fall, i've been living out of a suitcase (duffel bag). it's kind of cool in a way, but recently i've come to realize that it's a curse. i can't stay in one place for more than two days without feeling the itch to move on to somewhere else. needless to say i've racked up a decent amount of mileage and my gas bills have been a tad bit more than when i actualy had some place to call home. i have no set schedule. no "i go home every weekend" or "i stay in irvine during the week." no set days for here, certain days there. for me, i go where the wind takes me. my job will be that way too. i will never have to stay in one place for more than one day. it's nice to have such freedom but i'm beginning to fear that it's training my attention span to be so short it's becoming unhealthy.
i think that may be a reason i bought that ticket to new york. i'm outgrowing socal and need a change of scenery.
it's gotten to the point where i am even dreaming about a career taking me further than the outskirts of southern california. a career where i can jetset all over the country (or globe!). new york some days. chicago. houston. boston. shanghai. tokyo. hong kong. paris. london. man, how awesome would that be? really living out of a suitcase. no place to call my home. i imagine that sort of life would get lonely, but for me, staying in one place too long is getting lonely. it's like something is always missing.