learning.
So, this being my first relationship that has lasted longer than a month, there are things that I am learning minute by minute, day by day. Getting used to thinking of yourself as part of a couple is a big task in and of itself. I can feel myself rebelling ever so often, secretly contemplating enjoyment I used to get out of being alone.
But then I mentally slap myself and realize...Damn, it's good to wake up to the warm arms of someone you love wrapped around you.
And these things are so sweet.
I remember the days when I longed for just a simple hug from a friend. I am a firm believer in the healing power of touch, for I feel my body being energized and my heart stirring with every embrace. I appreciate each and every one.
There are other things about being with someone that I am still struggling with:
Jealousy - I get jealous from the simplest of glances or the tiniest of conversations. I get easily down on myself b/c of this one...
Emotions - I sense when he is down, and then become down myself. Or I just detach myself and begin to think that I'd rather be alone...
Confidence - Sometimes I don't see myself as a competent partner, a little, inexperienced girl, and I worry about his past relationships, sometimes wondering what it is like to go through that many, and if I really mean anything at all compared to others.
I'm sure these are just a few of the things we all go through in every relationship, some maybe more than others. But each day I'm learning to cope with these. Learning about myself is not a bad thing, after all...
Mmmmm, and I secretly love this cold icky weather. It makes me want to cuddle, hot baths are better, and I just love wearing tights and jackets and hats. Today will be a good day.
But then I mentally slap myself and realize...Damn, it's good to wake up to the warm arms of someone you love wrapped around you.
And these things are so sweet.
I remember the days when I longed for just a simple hug from a friend. I am a firm believer in the healing power of touch, for I feel my body being energized and my heart stirring with every embrace. I appreciate each and every one.
There are other things about being with someone that I am still struggling with:
Jealousy - I get jealous from the simplest of glances or the tiniest of conversations. I get easily down on myself b/c of this one...
Emotions - I sense when he is down, and then become down myself. Or I just detach myself and begin to think that I'd rather be alone...
Confidence - Sometimes I don't see myself as a competent partner, a little, inexperienced girl, and I worry about his past relationships, sometimes wondering what it is like to go through that many, and if I really mean anything at all compared to others.
I'm sure these are just a few of the things we all go through in every relationship, some maybe more than others. But each day I'm learning to cope with these. Learning about myself is not a bad thing, after all...
Mmmmm, and I secretly love this cold icky weather. It makes me want to cuddle, hot baths are better, and I just love wearing tights and jackets and hats. Today will be a good day.