OOM: events of The Swarm War
[ooc: as before, contains spoilers for TSW. 90% of this (everything except some of Tahiri's specific thoughts and actions) is taken directly from the novel and poorly reworded to fit into Tahiri's perspective. Copyrights still belong to Troy Denning, Lucasfilm, Del Ray, and lots of people who are not me.]
Ever since the raid on Supply Depot Thrago, Tahiri had been growing closer to Jacen Solo. Not because, like her mindmates feared, she was in love with him or agreed with his methods of trying to stop the war their surprise attack on the Chiss had triggered-- she was doing it because she didn't trust him.
Let Jacen and the other Jedi think that the forearm rubbing, the constant blinking whenever he looked her way, was because of a girlish crush. Tahiri's time with the Yuuzhan Vong had resulted in a personality split-- Jacen had been with them far longer, and in the years after the Yuuzhan Vong war had learned things from dozens of other Force users. Tahiri did not quite trust the new person he had become, and so was trying to slip into his mind to see if she could tell what he was really thinking.
It was not working very well so far. Jacen kept himself closed off, even when part of the battle meld. She didn't know what he was hiding, but she intended to find out.
---
The team of six Jedi was given another reason to distrust Jacen when, in the midst of a skirmish between the Chiss and Killiks on an unnamed sandy world, the younger Solo helped the blue-skinned enemy destroy a mysterious bomb that the team was trying to recover.
There was no time to call Jacen on his actions, as the entire team had felt a strong Force call not unlike the one that had brought them into the Killik mess in the first place-- except this one was centered on Ossus, at the Jedi Academy. And it was coming from Master Luke Skywalker.
---
Every Jedi who was able attended the meeting. The Solos, the younglings who were still going through their training-- every single Jedi or future Jedi was on Ossus to hear what Master Skywalker had to say. Every Jedi but two-- Jaina and Zekk.
"Thirty-five standard years ago, I became the last guardian of an ancient order that had thrived for a thousand generations. During all that time, no evil dared challenge its power, no honest being ever questioned its integrity. Yet fall it did, brought low by the treachery of a Sith Lord who disguised himself as a friend and an ally. Only a handful of Masters survived, hiding in deserts and swamps so that the bright light that was the Jedi Order would not be extinguished.
"Under the guidance of two of those Masters, I became the instrument of the Jedi's return, and I have dedicated myself to rekindling the light of their order. Ours may be a paler, smaller beacon than the one that once lit the way for the Old Republic, but it has been growing, both in size and brilliance.
"We have been growing until now.
"Now we are threatened by a different enemy, one that I brought into our midst through my misunderstanding of the old practices. In my arrogance, I believed we had found a better way, one more in tune with the challenges we face in our time. I was wrong.
"In the order I envisioned, we served the Force by following our own consciences. We taught our apprentices well, and we trusted them to follow their own hearts. It was a splendid dream, but it has been growing more impractical for some time now.
"My mistake was forgetting that good beings can disagree. They can evaluate all of the evidence and study it from every angle and still reach opposite conclusions. And each side can believe with pure hearts that only their view is right.
"When that happens, it's easy to lose sight of something far more important than who's right and who's wrong. When the Jedi are at odds with each other, they are at odds with the Force.
"And when the Jedi are at odds with the Force, they can't perform their duty to themselves, to the Order, or to the Alliance.
"I've meditated at length, and I've concluded that how we respond in a crisis-- the one facing us now or any other-- is far less important than responding to it together. Even with the Force to guide us, we're only mortal. We are going to make mistakes.
"But mistakes themselves will never destroy us. As long as we work together, we'll always have the strength to recover. What we can't recover from is fighting amongst ourselves. It will leave us too exhausted to face our enemies. And that is what Lomi Plo and the Dark Nest want. It's the only way they can defeat us.
"So I'm asking each of you to rethink your commitment to the Jedi. If you can't place the good of the order above all else and follow the direction chosen by your superiors, I'm asking you to leave. If you have other duties or loyalties that come before the order, I'm asking you to leave. If you cannot be a Jedi Knight first, I'm asking you not to be a Jedi Knight at all."
---
Master Skywalker's address to the Jedi went off like a stun grenade. Tahiri turned to her friends as Luke left the hall, mind racing. It was true, they had gone against the order's wishes in helping the Killiks-- but what else were they supposed to do? The Chiss were trying to wipe them out, and would have succeeded without Jedi involvement!
Lowie and Tesar agreed, as did the other Jedi who had spent time in Killik nests. They discussed this new development quietly as Jedi began to filter out of the room.
Misguided as she felt the order was sometimes, Tahiri loved it. Master Skywalker was right about at least one thing-- the division over the Killik issue was killing them as surely as any Sith lord. It was time someone did something.
But to put the Order first, above everything? Above the Force, above their own consciences? In theory it was a good idea, but it was too easily abused. If the Jedi existed only to take orders from the Council, then they were no better than common soldiers. A Jedi had to think for herself, to make sure that the actions she was taking were the right ones.
Master Skywalker returned, and the young Jedi's conversation slowed as they tried to hear what he was discussing with the other Masters. They were trying to clarify what "putting the order first" meant to Jedi with family, then the conversation turned to what was to be done about the Killiks.
Finally, Jacen spoke up. "I know how to stop the war. We kill Raynar Thul."
Tahiri and the other Jedi who had followed Jacen to Supply Depot Thrago did not even bother hiding their shock and surprise. Killing Raynar would destroy the Colony! Master Skywalker urged the others to hear Jacen out, but Tahiri interrupted.
"Hearing Jacen out is dangerous," she said, glaring at the Solo boy. "He says one thing and means another."
Coming from Tahiri, who the Solos had seen almost as their own daughter since Anakin's death, the remark stung.
"That's enough!" Master Skywalker said, scowling first at Tahiri and then at Tesar and Lowie. "This debate is among the Masters, and when we ask for your opinion, you're going to give it in a civilized fashion. Is that clear?"
"Yes, Master."
After more discussion, it became clear that according to Jacen's theory (and supported by Cighal's research), it was going to be impossible to destroy the Dark Nest without also destroying the Colony. When Han and Leia agreed that Raynar would have to be eliminated, Corran was very quick to question their position, asking if they would be so willing to kill a Joiner if it were Jaina or Zekk in Raynar's place.
The accusation broke the uneasy peace Luke had forged between the Masters, and the group of Jedi fell into another of their constant, circular arguments. Frustrated with their inability to agree, Master Skywalker finally halted the discussion. "Thank you for your opinions. I'll consider them all carefully and let you know what I decide."
Tahiri blinked in surprise. He's done it. He's actually done it. He's taken control of the Jedi Order.
---
Several days later, Luke asksed Tahiri, Tesar, and Lowbacca to meet him in the Knights Billet on the tenth floor of the Jedi Academy. He had discovered that Tesar and Lowbacca told Raynar's mother that the Jedi wanted to eliminate her son, in hopes that she could warn him in time.
Needless to say, Master Skywalker was none to pleased about this. It was betrayal of the Masters' confidence, and he had to take action. Fearing that the three Jedi's minds were still being influenced by Unu's Will, he brought the Jedi Healer Cighal along to see if she could tell for certain.
Tahiri was in the middle of a thirteen-remote training exercise when the Masters arrived, and did not stop while they spoke with her friends. She had not told Madame Thul about the plot, so Master Skywalker didn't want to speak with her yet anyway. But she could hear their conversation over the whine of blaster bolts.
When Master Skywalker confronted Tesar and Lowie about their actions, they tried to explain. They did not believe killing Raynar was the right choice-- destroying the Colony was immoral, as was assassinating a friend and fellow Jedi.
Lowie accused the Jedi of not following the Force on this matter, but Luke countered that they still followed the Force... but through the Jedi Order. There was too much chaos when everyone followed their own paths, which made it hard to be effective.
Tahiri ended the exercise with a mental nudge at the last half-dozen remotes, then grabbed a towel and walked over to join the conversation. There were holes in her jumpsuit where a few stray bolts had gotten past her defenses, and blisters were beginning to form. They hurt, but not enough to distract her.
"If you're calling me a yuugrr, I'm not sure I follow your analogy," she heard Master Skywalker say. "What's it supposed to mean?"
"Not that you are a yuugrr," Tahiri replied, joining them. "You're following one-- and you're taking the whole order with you. We had to do something."
"We?" Master Skywalker asked. "Madame Thul didn't mention your name."
"Only because those two didn't tell me what they were doing." Tahiri shot Lowie and Tesar a dirty look. "Otherwise, I would have been right there with them."
"I appreciate your honesty, but I still don't understand."
"It's not complicated." Tahiri took a seat between Lowie and Tesar, rubbing her forearms against theirs in the Killik manner. She knew it would unsettle Master Skywalker, but she needed to show him whose side she was taking. "You listen to Jacen as though he were a senior Master, and his advice can't be trusted. He has his own agenda."
"Jacen isn't the one who broke confidentiality," Master Skywalker retorted. Lowie and Tesar continued to press the subject, and Tahiri sighed. It was clear that he wasn't going to listen to anything they had to say about his nephew-- Luke trusted Jacen too much. It was dangerous.
After a glance at Cighal-- probably asking if we're Joiners Tahiri thought at her friends-- Master Skywalker tried broaching the subject again. "But I value your opinions just as highly. If Jacen has a different agenda, what is it?"
All three Jedi Knights let out nervous throat-clicks. Then Tahiri said, "We haven't been able to figure that out."
"But it had something to do with Supply Depot Thrago," Tesar added.
The three Jedi Knights tried to explain that they thought Jacen had lied about his vision-- that the Chiss still had ships mothballed in cold storage, and their response to the Jedi assault was improvised, with not nearly enough forward support.
They were surprised when Master Skywalker dismissed their concerns and supported Jacen anyway, saying that perhaps he was right to initiate the attack, even if the Chiss were not ready.
Tahiri gaped at the old Jedi. He's not serious, is he? she thought at her friends. Attack an unarmed and unprepared opponent? Jacen LIED to us, and still Master Skywalker is on his side!
Luke could not even be deflected from his purpose when the three Jedi told him about Jacen performing the mindrub on Ben, Luke's own son. True, it was second-hand information, but despite everything the three Jedi Knights had done for the Order, despite all of the things they had told Master Skywalker, he still would not listen to their concerns about Jacen.
He still thinks we're Joiners. That we're doing this because Unu tells us to. He doesn't trust us.
Finally, Master Skywalker brought the meeting to a close. "There are many questions about why you betrayed the Order, but there are none as to whether you did. You tried to influence my decision by bringing pressure to bear from Madame Thul. Your actions cast serious doubt on your desire to remain Jedi Knights. I suggest you go to Dagobah to reflect on this subject."
"Dagobah?" Tesar rasped. "You are sending us on vacation?"
"On retreat," Master Skywalker corrected. "To meditate on what it means to be a Jedi Knight."
Tahiri and Lowie exchanged glances, then Tahiri asked, "For how long?"
"Until I send for you," Master Skywalker replied. "And if you have any desire at all to remain members of the Jedi Order, you will obey me in this. I'll take any failure-- for any reason whatsoever-- as your resignation."
Ever since the raid on Supply Depot Thrago, Tahiri had been growing closer to Jacen Solo. Not because, like her mindmates feared, she was in love with him or agreed with his methods of trying to stop the war their surprise attack on the Chiss had triggered-- she was doing it because she didn't trust him.
Let Jacen and the other Jedi think that the forearm rubbing, the constant blinking whenever he looked her way, was because of a girlish crush. Tahiri's time with the Yuuzhan Vong had resulted in a personality split-- Jacen had been with them far longer, and in the years after the Yuuzhan Vong war had learned things from dozens of other Force users. Tahiri did not quite trust the new person he had become, and so was trying to slip into his mind to see if she could tell what he was really thinking.
It was not working very well so far. Jacen kept himself closed off, even when part of the battle meld. She didn't know what he was hiding, but she intended to find out.
---
The team of six Jedi was given another reason to distrust Jacen when, in the midst of a skirmish between the Chiss and Killiks on an unnamed sandy world, the younger Solo helped the blue-skinned enemy destroy a mysterious bomb that the team was trying to recover.
There was no time to call Jacen on his actions, as the entire team had felt a strong Force call not unlike the one that had brought them into the Killik mess in the first place-- except this one was centered on Ossus, at the Jedi Academy. And it was coming from Master Luke Skywalker.
---
Every Jedi who was able attended the meeting. The Solos, the younglings who were still going through their training-- every single Jedi or future Jedi was on Ossus to hear what Master Skywalker had to say. Every Jedi but two-- Jaina and Zekk.
"Thirty-five standard years ago, I became the last guardian of an ancient order that had thrived for a thousand generations. During all that time, no evil dared challenge its power, no honest being ever questioned its integrity. Yet fall it did, brought low by the treachery of a Sith Lord who disguised himself as a friend and an ally. Only a handful of Masters survived, hiding in deserts and swamps so that the bright light that was the Jedi Order would not be extinguished.
"Under the guidance of two of those Masters, I became the instrument of the Jedi's return, and I have dedicated myself to rekindling the light of their order. Ours may be a paler, smaller beacon than the one that once lit the way for the Old Republic, but it has been growing, both in size and brilliance.
"We have been growing until now.
"Now we are threatened by a different enemy, one that I brought into our midst through my misunderstanding of the old practices. In my arrogance, I believed we had found a better way, one more in tune with the challenges we face in our time. I was wrong.
"In the order I envisioned, we served the Force by following our own consciences. We taught our apprentices well, and we trusted them to follow their own hearts. It was a splendid dream, but it has been growing more impractical for some time now.
"My mistake was forgetting that good beings can disagree. They can evaluate all of the evidence and study it from every angle and still reach opposite conclusions. And each side can believe with pure hearts that only their view is right.
"When that happens, it's easy to lose sight of something far more important than who's right and who's wrong. When the Jedi are at odds with each other, they are at odds with the Force.
"And when the Jedi are at odds with the Force, they can't perform their duty to themselves, to the Order, or to the Alliance.
"I've meditated at length, and I've concluded that how we respond in a crisis-- the one facing us now or any other-- is far less important than responding to it together. Even with the Force to guide us, we're only mortal. We are going to make mistakes.
"But mistakes themselves will never destroy us. As long as we work together, we'll always have the strength to recover. What we can't recover from is fighting amongst ourselves. It will leave us too exhausted to face our enemies. And that is what Lomi Plo and the Dark Nest want. It's the only way they can defeat us.
"So I'm asking each of you to rethink your commitment to the Jedi. If you can't place the good of the order above all else and follow the direction chosen by your superiors, I'm asking you to leave. If you have other duties or loyalties that come before the order, I'm asking you to leave. If you cannot be a Jedi Knight first, I'm asking you not to be a Jedi Knight at all."
---
Master Skywalker's address to the Jedi went off like a stun grenade. Tahiri turned to her friends as Luke left the hall, mind racing. It was true, they had gone against the order's wishes in helping the Killiks-- but what else were they supposed to do? The Chiss were trying to wipe them out, and would have succeeded without Jedi involvement!
Lowie and Tesar agreed, as did the other Jedi who had spent time in Killik nests. They discussed this new development quietly as Jedi began to filter out of the room.
Misguided as she felt the order was sometimes, Tahiri loved it. Master Skywalker was right about at least one thing-- the division over the Killik issue was killing them as surely as any Sith lord. It was time someone did something.
But to put the Order first, above everything? Above the Force, above their own consciences? In theory it was a good idea, but it was too easily abused. If the Jedi existed only to take orders from the Council, then they were no better than common soldiers. A Jedi had to think for herself, to make sure that the actions she was taking were the right ones.
Master Skywalker returned, and the young Jedi's conversation slowed as they tried to hear what he was discussing with the other Masters. They were trying to clarify what "putting the order first" meant to Jedi with family, then the conversation turned to what was to be done about the Killiks.
Finally, Jacen spoke up. "I know how to stop the war. We kill Raynar Thul."
Tahiri and the other Jedi who had followed Jacen to Supply Depot Thrago did not even bother hiding their shock and surprise. Killing Raynar would destroy the Colony! Master Skywalker urged the others to hear Jacen out, but Tahiri interrupted.
"Hearing Jacen out is dangerous," she said, glaring at the Solo boy. "He says one thing and means another."
Coming from Tahiri, who the Solos had seen almost as their own daughter since Anakin's death, the remark stung.
"That's enough!" Master Skywalker said, scowling first at Tahiri and then at Tesar and Lowie. "This debate is among the Masters, and when we ask for your opinion, you're going to give it in a civilized fashion. Is that clear?"
"Yes, Master."
After more discussion, it became clear that according to Jacen's theory (and supported by Cighal's research), it was going to be impossible to destroy the Dark Nest without also destroying the Colony. When Han and Leia agreed that Raynar would have to be eliminated, Corran was very quick to question their position, asking if they would be so willing to kill a Joiner if it were Jaina or Zekk in Raynar's place.
The accusation broke the uneasy peace Luke had forged between the Masters, and the group of Jedi fell into another of their constant, circular arguments. Frustrated with their inability to agree, Master Skywalker finally halted the discussion. "Thank you for your opinions. I'll consider them all carefully and let you know what I decide."
Tahiri blinked in surprise. He's done it. He's actually done it. He's taken control of the Jedi Order.
---
Several days later, Luke asksed Tahiri, Tesar, and Lowbacca to meet him in the Knights Billet on the tenth floor of the Jedi Academy. He had discovered that Tesar and Lowbacca told Raynar's mother that the Jedi wanted to eliminate her son, in hopes that she could warn him in time.
Needless to say, Master Skywalker was none to pleased about this. It was betrayal of the Masters' confidence, and he had to take action. Fearing that the three Jedi's minds were still being influenced by Unu's Will, he brought the Jedi Healer Cighal along to see if she could tell for certain.
Tahiri was in the middle of a thirteen-remote training exercise when the Masters arrived, and did not stop while they spoke with her friends. She had not told Madame Thul about the plot, so Master Skywalker didn't want to speak with her yet anyway. But she could hear their conversation over the whine of blaster bolts.
When Master Skywalker confronted Tesar and Lowie about their actions, they tried to explain. They did not believe killing Raynar was the right choice-- destroying the Colony was immoral, as was assassinating a friend and fellow Jedi.
Lowie accused the Jedi of not following the Force on this matter, but Luke countered that they still followed the Force... but through the Jedi Order. There was too much chaos when everyone followed their own paths, which made it hard to be effective.
Tahiri ended the exercise with a mental nudge at the last half-dozen remotes, then grabbed a towel and walked over to join the conversation. There were holes in her jumpsuit where a few stray bolts had gotten past her defenses, and blisters were beginning to form. They hurt, but not enough to distract her.
"If you're calling me a yuugrr, I'm not sure I follow your analogy," she heard Master Skywalker say. "What's it supposed to mean?"
"Not that you are a yuugrr," Tahiri replied, joining them. "You're following one-- and you're taking the whole order with you. We had to do something."
"We?" Master Skywalker asked. "Madame Thul didn't mention your name."
"Only because those two didn't tell me what they were doing." Tahiri shot Lowie and Tesar a dirty look. "Otherwise, I would have been right there with them."
"I appreciate your honesty, but I still don't understand."
"It's not complicated." Tahiri took a seat between Lowie and Tesar, rubbing her forearms against theirs in the Killik manner. She knew it would unsettle Master Skywalker, but she needed to show him whose side she was taking. "You listen to Jacen as though he were a senior Master, and his advice can't be trusted. He has his own agenda."
"Jacen isn't the one who broke confidentiality," Master Skywalker retorted. Lowie and Tesar continued to press the subject, and Tahiri sighed. It was clear that he wasn't going to listen to anything they had to say about his nephew-- Luke trusted Jacen too much. It was dangerous.
After a glance at Cighal-- probably asking if we're Joiners Tahiri thought at her friends-- Master Skywalker tried broaching the subject again. "But I value your opinions just as highly. If Jacen has a different agenda, what is it?"
All three Jedi Knights let out nervous throat-clicks. Then Tahiri said, "We haven't been able to figure that out."
"But it had something to do with Supply Depot Thrago," Tesar added.
The three Jedi Knights tried to explain that they thought Jacen had lied about his vision-- that the Chiss still had ships mothballed in cold storage, and their response to the Jedi assault was improvised, with not nearly enough forward support.
They were surprised when Master Skywalker dismissed their concerns and supported Jacen anyway, saying that perhaps he was right to initiate the attack, even if the Chiss were not ready.
Tahiri gaped at the old Jedi. He's not serious, is he? she thought at her friends. Attack an unarmed and unprepared opponent? Jacen LIED to us, and still Master Skywalker is on his side!
Luke could not even be deflected from his purpose when the three Jedi told him about Jacen performing the mindrub on Ben, Luke's own son. True, it was second-hand information, but despite everything the three Jedi Knights had done for the Order, despite all of the things they had told Master Skywalker, he still would not listen to their concerns about Jacen.
He still thinks we're Joiners. That we're doing this because Unu tells us to. He doesn't trust us.
Finally, Master Skywalker brought the meeting to a close. "There are many questions about why you betrayed the Order, but there are none as to whether you did. You tried to influence my decision by bringing pressure to bear from Madame Thul. Your actions cast serious doubt on your desire to remain Jedi Knights. I suggest you go to Dagobah to reflect on this subject."
"Dagobah?" Tesar rasped. "You are sending us on vacation?"
"On retreat," Master Skywalker corrected. "To meditate on what it means to be a Jedi Knight."
Tahiri and Lowie exchanged glances, then Tahiri asked, "For how long?"
"Until I send for you," Master Skywalker replied. "And if you have any desire at all to remain members of the Jedi Order, you will obey me in this. I'll take any failure-- for any reason whatsoever-- as your resignation."