"Suffering is the Best Punishment" - Chapter 17
Title: Suffering is the Best Punishment
Author: Shannon - shannyfish
Disclaimer: I do not own “The Mentalist” or its characters, CBS does. This is merely for entertainment purposes only.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Takes Place during Season Two. Red John attacks Jane using his own twisted type of psychological warfare.
Warning: Severe spoilers for season one.
Chapter 17 - “Take Comfort”
Author’s Note: The more reviews, the more likely I am to finish this fic this year :D So, review! I’m still irritated that I have to wait at least another week and a half for a new ep… I would so watch new eps on Thanksgiving!!!
............................
“Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy.” - Eskimo Proverb
Fresno, CA
“You know, for once you know what would be nice?” Jane asked.
“If you say you want food, I’m going to shoot you,” Lisbon threatened seriously.
He grinned at her. “No, well…okay, so that would be nice, but I was going to say to do one of these things outside. Like in a nice grassy area where you can see the stars.” They’d been after a killer who had murdered a wealthy businessman up in Sacramento, but who had fled down to Fresno. This businessman was apparently very close to government officials, at least when he was still alive. Jane really didn’t care about the case…he was just there because so was Lisbon.
“I can drive him back to Sacramento if you’d like, Boss,” Cho spoke up from the passenger seat.
“Oh! Cho! That hurts me!” Jane played as he put his hands over his heart as if he had been shot. He was sitting in the back seat, in the middle so that he could see both Lisbon and Cho with ease. Lisbon was in the driver’s seat and Cho in the passenger’s seat. Rigsby and Van Pelt were in another vehicle across the street. He was tempted to leave this vehicle and head on over to check on them. Make sure that they were using their time together wisely…at least as wisely as two law enforcement agents could do while on a stake out.
Cho didn’t seem amused, but Jane didn’t care. He smiled brightly anyway. He was enjoying himself. Of course, it could be more fun without Cho there, but he didn’t mind him…he’d just prefer some time alone with Lisbon. He didn’t think that that was so bad, though he doubted that she’d be able to concentrate as well if it had just been the two of them…which was probably why Cho was there. Cho kept him from being too distracting.
“Do we have binoculars?” Jane asked as he moved forward so he was in between the two front seats.
“Why do you need binoculars?” Cho asked, his head still straight forward.
Cho was always on the job like that, which was probably why Minelli chose him to be in charge of the team in Lisbon’s absence. Rigsby could get emotional and Van Pelt was too inexperienced. And obviously, he wasn’t an agent and would have been a career killing choice. Jane didn’t take offense though. He liked Virgil Minelli enough.
“So that I can do some reconnaissance work,” Jane said.
“What kind?”
“What kind? Well, of course it’s for the case…”
“You’re going to have to be more specific,” Cho insisted.
Jane frowned. “I need them to check on Rigsby and Grace.”
“They’re over there,” Cho said as his head nodded in their direction.
“But I can’t see them from here.”
Cho turned back to Jane. “You’re not going to get binoculars to satisfy your childish need to spy on them.”
“I wouldn’t call it childish,” Jane said, feeling slightly offended.
“I would,” Cho stated as he turned back.
Lisbon had remained quiet and Jane was fairly certain that she was talking to him as little as possible while around the others. She still didn’t know what to think about his confession. Jane didn’t think she knew what to think or feel about him when it came to Red John as well. So, he was trying to be a gentleman and let her process everything. He really didn’t see any other way.
…
CBI Headquarters
It was late. They’d be hard at work in their vehicles at the stake out for hours upon hours with no tea and no decent food. And what had come of it? Fate being wicked and cruel. Their suspect was arrested after being pulled over twenty miles from where they’d been parked. Wasn’t that how it always was? But now there was paperwork to be done. Of course, he didn’t have to have any of it, but he liked to be there. For morale support. And for Lisbon. Okay, so he definitely had ulterior motives, when did he not? It wasn’t like this was anything new. Plus, he could keep an eye on Lisbon while napping on his couch and still have access to his tea and snacks. CBI Headquarters was well stocked like that. He made a mental note to later tell Minelli how much he appreciated how much work they went to in order to make it so comfortable for him to work there.
“You should go home,” Lisbon said.
Jane was lying on the couch in her office. It wasn’t as comfortable as his couch, but it was closer to Lisbon. There were pros and cons to each location, but right now Lisbon was the biggest pro. “You sent Van Pelt home, you sent Rigsby home…but you haven’t sent Cho home yet…”
Lisbon looked up at him. “Cho’s busy,” she said as she motioned to where Cho was working out at his desk. “He’s finishing up his report.”
“You know that this all could have been done tomorrow,” Jane pointed out.
“I prefer it’s done as soon as possible so all the details are fresh in everyone’s minds,” Lisbon told him.
“Really?” he asked. “Don’t they just have to write that it was a huge waste of time?”
“Hey!”
“Truth hurts, Lisbon,” Jane said as he looked back at her. “Though, I have to admit I don’t think Grace or Rigsby minded. They were all smiley and couldn’t keep their eyes off of each other afterwards.”
“I didn’t notice that.”
“That’s because you’ve been distracted,” Jane told her.
“No,” she replied. “No, I haven’t.”
“We both know why…”
Lisbon frowned deeply. “We can’t have this conversation right now. Not right now and especially not here.”
“Why not? Just us and Cho.”
“And what if he hears?” Lisbon asked, lowering her voice.
“Who cares?” Jane asked, his voice remaining the same.
“Jane-“
“It’s Cho, Lisbon.”
He thought that it was a good point, but it just seemed to irritate her more. She started to type a bit more furious. Jane thought that it was lucky that so much was electronic nowadays, otherwise, a poor pen’s life might be at stake! And with his luck, the ink would end up all over not only Lisbon and her desk, but him as well.
After about another half an hour of lying there in Lisbon’s office, Cho dropped off his report and left the building. Jane was sure that it was fast approaching midnight. He looked over at Lisbon, who still was irritated with him. Her face was scrunched up in places and tight. She was still typing a bit hard on her keyboard and she kept cursing under her breath at every little mistake she kept making.
More time passed and Jane wondered if Lisbon’s report was going to end up being the size of a best selling novel. She’d been at it long enough. It would take Minelli days to read it! If he read it at all. He wished that Lisbon would just decide to call it a day. He was definitely ready to sleep. He doubted, though, that she was going to allow him to sleep over. She was still processing. It was in her face as well. She was still trying to figure out what to make of him.
Jane figured that she was still deciding if he was playing a game or if there was something else going on. This wasn’t a game to him, but he could see how Lisbon would be cautious of him. She at the very least, he figured, would know to trust him even if it was only a little. To believe that he wouldn’t do something as cruel as confess his love for her if it was a lie. That wasn’t the case. He loved her.
“It’ll be here in the morning, Lisbon,” Jane told her.
“It is the morning,” she pointed out.
He let out a sigh. “Really? What time is it now?”
“One-ten,” she replied sleepily.
Maybe they really had been there that long. He hadn’t thought it was quite that late. It was amazing how much time could just zoom right by when you were lying on a couch and just listening to someone be irritated at her computer. He really didn’t think anyone would be coming in the next day at their normal time. He figured that maybe noon was a good time for people to start showing up, but still leave at like four or five as long as there were no murders to investigate. Of course, this was California and he was pretty sure that murderers just didn’t take vacations… He thought it was something, though, that they should really look into.
“Come on, I’ll walk you to your car,” Jane offered.
“I may just sleep here tonight,” she said.
He could see that she was exhausted. More so than she’d let on before. Fatigue had overcome her and under her eyes were dark circles. She was beyond exhausted and there was no way that she’d be able to drive home safely. He on the other hand had napped since they’d returned.
“I’ll drive you home,” he offered.
“Jane-“
“I insist… I can come by and pick you up when you want to come back in,” he offered. He figured that that way there was no pressure. He hadn’t mentioned him crashing with her, so there was absolutely no pressure there. He was just making sure that she got home okay. He thought it was quite chivalrous.
“If you had a change of clothes, I’d say that you should just spend the night,” she told him.
He’d actually thought about suggesting she stay with him. He knew that they all kept a bag with a change of clothes in the office, but he didn’t. But he really didn’t have a place for her to stay and Red John had proved a few times that his residence just wasn’t safe. Red John’s blood stained fingerprints were all over his house. They were inerasable and apparently he was just inescapable.
“I’ll be fine,” he insisted.
“No-“
“Really… I sleep on the couch here all the time. I’m not going to freak out if my pants are wrinkly…”
Lisbon frowned a little bit and then let her face fall into the palm of her hand. “I have an iron,” she said and then let out a yawn. “You don’t have to come in with wrinkles…”
“See…all figured out,” he told her with a smile. She smiled back and he knew it was genuine. It was good to see even in her sleep deprived state. It had been a long day and it was definitely time for some rest.
He waited for Lisbon to print out her report and stapled it together before setting it on her desk. He knew that Minelli wouldn’t look at them until the next day anyways. Jane still wasn’t sure if he read them. He wouldn’t, he’d ask for the cliff notes version, which is what he was sure Minelli called an ‘update’.
Gathering himself up from the couch, he picked up his jacket and pulled it on. He watched as Lisbon pulled on her blazer and looked around sleepily, he was sure she was checking to see that she had everything. After a moment, she rounded her desk to him. Jane smiled at her and then collected her forgotten keys and cell phone from their obscured hiding places on her desk. He handed them to her and received a smile for his efforts.
“I think we’re ready now,” he said as he took her arm and put it through his. He’d happily escort her out of the building and make sure that she got home okay. After all, it was the least he could do. He also got the happy bonus of getting extra alone time with her, even if it was spent sleeping on the couch. Last time she’d allow him to share her bed (clothes on, of course), but he didn’t think that that offer would be extended once again. The couch was fine, though. He was still close by and she would have made it home safely.
…
Lisbon Residence
At five in the morning, Jane woke unexpectedly to the screams of Teresa Lisbon. He fell off the couch and hurried to her bedroom. Upon reaching the door, which was wide open, his eyes fell upon her upright form. She was panting, tears were streaming down her face, and she looked terrified. He surveyed the room quickly before entering and going directly to Lisbon’s side. The room looked undisturbed and he quickly came to the conclusion that it was probably a nightmare, an intense one.
“I’m fine,” she managed to get out between pants; her hand went up like a stop side.
Jane froze, but only for a moment. He sat on the edge of her bed and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. She was shaking and it made him worry even more. “Tell me about it,” he said after a moment as he stroked her hair and listened to her breathing. She was working on slowing it back to normal. Her tears stained his shirt, but he didn’t care. They’d dry.
“It’s stupid,” she whispered.
“Tell me about it,” he insisted as gently as possible.
“I don’t even know…it doesn’t make sense,” she told him. “I know it was Red John, but I didn’t see him.”
“You don’t know what he looks like, so that makes sense,” he reasoned.
“He was hurting you…and I couldn’t help you. I tried to shoot him, but my gun wouldn’t work. I remember checking it to make sure it had ammo and it did, but it wouldn’t shoot. It would just click and you’d scream. You told me to run, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t do anything,” she said, half crying again.
He held her closer, allowing for her face to rest against his chest. “Shhh…” he tried to soothe. “It was just a nightmare, Teresa.”
“I know…and that’s what’s stupid,” she said, pulling back away from him and wiping the tears away with her hand. “I know it’s all a nightmare… I know it wasn’t real… But it felt so real to me.”
Jane frowned. “When I was little, my mother used to distract me by having me look up at the sky… She’d point out the stars and connect them to make some kind of creature for me,” Jane shared. “And now, I’d try to distract you as well, but let’s face it… This is California and there are hardly any stars that are visible compared to when we were younger…”
Lisbon smiled a little bit. “What did she make them into?”
“Sometimes ducks or cats…and sometimes people. She liked to believe in angels…she’d say that the angels were people we loved who had gone to heaven that were looking down on us.”
“I like that story,” she said.
Jane looked at her. “You don’t seriously believe that the stars are angels, do you?”
Lisbon shrugged. “It’s nice to think at least.”
“True… It is comforting…” He held her closer. She was still relaxing. He wanted her to relax, after all, he needed to relax too after she’d practically scared him to death with her scream. He was really still recovering.
“It’s early, isn’t it?” she asked.
He could hear the exhaustion in her voice. It was heavy and her latest ordeal probably just made her even more exhausted… He was used to the nightmares…the images of the note on his bedroom door, his wife and daughter’s bodies, and the daunting smiley painted on his wall. He was used to that…the continual torture of that day… Lisbon didn’t deserve to be haunted by such horrible and cruel visions. Jane wished he could pluck the horrible memories from her head and hold onto him himself. To protect her. Of course, Lisbon would tell him that she didn’t need protecting, but Jane figured that everyone needed protecting. Whether they knew it or not.
She’d protected him.
Now, he’d look out for her…in ways that he hadn’t before.
Life was fragile…
“Go back to sleep, Teresa,” he whispered. He held her close and kissed her forehead. Her head was on his shoulder and her body was pressed against him. He rubbed her back to try to help her relax and drop back off to sleep.
“You need sleep too,” she mumbled.
Jane carefully moved over, with Lisbon still held close. He didn’t want to fall asleep himself and then end up falling off the bed and pulling Lisbon down with him. He moved some of the pillows and he covered her up with the blanket as well. He wanted her comfortable. She moved about a bit, he imagined in order for her to get comfortable and after a few minutes she seemed to have fallen asleep. Jane didn’t chance waking her by moving. He adjusted a bit so that he was comfortable as well and eventually fell asleep with Lisbon in his arms.
…
TBC…
Author: Shannon - shannyfish
Disclaimer: I do not own “The Mentalist” or its characters, CBS does. This is merely for entertainment purposes only.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Takes Place during Season Two. Red John attacks Jane using his own twisted type of psychological warfare.
Warning: Severe spoilers for season one.
Chapter 17 - “Take Comfort”
Author’s Note: The more reviews, the more likely I am to finish this fic this year :D So, review! I’m still irritated that I have to wait at least another week and a half for a new ep… I would so watch new eps on Thanksgiving!!!
............................
“Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy.” - Eskimo Proverb
Fresno, CA
“You know, for once you know what would be nice?” Jane asked.
“If you say you want food, I’m going to shoot you,” Lisbon threatened seriously.
He grinned at her. “No, well…okay, so that would be nice, but I was going to say to do one of these things outside. Like in a nice grassy area where you can see the stars.” They’d been after a killer who had murdered a wealthy businessman up in Sacramento, but who had fled down to Fresno. This businessman was apparently very close to government officials, at least when he was still alive. Jane really didn’t care about the case…he was just there because so was Lisbon.
“I can drive him back to Sacramento if you’d like, Boss,” Cho spoke up from the passenger seat.
“Oh! Cho! That hurts me!” Jane played as he put his hands over his heart as if he had been shot. He was sitting in the back seat, in the middle so that he could see both Lisbon and Cho with ease. Lisbon was in the driver’s seat and Cho in the passenger’s seat. Rigsby and Van Pelt were in another vehicle across the street. He was tempted to leave this vehicle and head on over to check on them. Make sure that they were using their time together wisely…at least as wisely as two law enforcement agents could do while on a stake out.
Cho didn’t seem amused, but Jane didn’t care. He smiled brightly anyway. He was enjoying himself. Of course, it could be more fun without Cho there, but he didn’t mind him…he’d just prefer some time alone with Lisbon. He didn’t think that that was so bad, though he doubted that she’d be able to concentrate as well if it had just been the two of them…which was probably why Cho was there. Cho kept him from being too distracting.
“Do we have binoculars?” Jane asked as he moved forward so he was in between the two front seats.
“Why do you need binoculars?” Cho asked, his head still straight forward.
Cho was always on the job like that, which was probably why Minelli chose him to be in charge of the team in Lisbon’s absence. Rigsby could get emotional and Van Pelt was too inexperienced. And obviously, he wasn’t an agent and would have been a career killing choice. Jane didn’t take offense though. He liked Virgil Minelli enough.
“So that I can do some reconnaissance work,” Jane said.
“What kind?”
“What kind? Well, of course it’s for the case…”
“You’re going to have to be more specific,” Cho insisted.
Jane frowned. “I need them to check on Rigsby and Grace.”
“They’re over there,” Cho said as his head nodded in their direction.
“But I can’t see them from here.”
Cho turned back to Jane. “You’re not going to get binoculars to satisfy your childish need to spy on them.”
“I wouldn’t call it childish,” Jane said, feeling slightly offended.
“I would,” Cho stated as he turned back.
Lisbon had remained quiet and Jane was fairly certain that she was talking to him as little as possible while around the others. She still didn’t know what to think about his confession. Jane didn’t think she knew what to think or feel about him when it came to Red John as well. So, he was trying to be a gentleman and let her process everything. He really didn’t see any other way.
…
CBI Headquarters
It was late. They’d be hard at work in their vehicles at the stake out for hours upon hours with no tea and no decent food. And what had come of it? Fate being wicked and cruel. Their suspect was arrested after being pulled over twenty miles from where they’d been parked. Wasn’t that how it always was? But now there was paperwork to be done. Of course, he didn’t have to have any of it, but he liked to be there. For morale support. And for Lisbon. Okay, so he definitely had ulterior motives, when did he not? It wasn’t like this was anything new. Plus, he could keep an eye on Lisbon while napping on his couch and still have access to his tea and snacks. CBI Headquarters was well stocked like that. He made a mental note to later tell Minelli how much he appreciated how much work they went to in order to make it so comfortable for him to work there.
“You should go home,” Lisbon said.
Jane was lying on the couch in her office. It wasn’t as comfortable as his couch, but it was closer to Lisbon. There were pros and cons to each location, but right now Lisbon was the biggest pro. “You sent Van Pelt home, you sent Rigsby home…but you haven’t sent Cho home yet…”
Lisbon looked up at him. “Cho’s busy,” she said as she motioned to where Cho was working out at his desk. “He’s finishing up his report.”
“You know that this all could have been done tomorrow,” Jane pointed out.
“I prefer it’s done as soon as possible so all the details are fresh in everyone’s minds,” Lisbon told him.
“Really?” he asked. “Don’t they just have to write that it was a huge waste of time?”
“Hey!”
“Truth hurts, Lisbon,” Jane said as he looked back at her. “Though, I have to admit I don’t think Grace or Rigsby minded. They were all smiley and couldn’t keep their eyes off of each other afterwards.”
“I didn’t notice that.”
“That’s because you’ve been distracted,” Jane told her.
“No,” she replied. “No, I haven’t.”
“We both know why…”
Lisbon frowned deeply. “We can’t have this conversation right now. Not right now and especially not here.”
“Why not? Just us and Cho.”
“And what if he hears?” Lisbon asked, lowering her voice.
“Who cares?” Jane asked, his voice remaining the same.
“Jane-“
“It’s Cho, Lisbon.”
He thought that it was a good point, but it just seemed to irritate her more. She started to type a bit more furious. Jane thought that it was lucky that so much was electronic nowadays, otherwise, a poor pen’s life might be at stake! And with his luck, the ink would end up all over not only Lisbon and her desk, but him as well.
After about another half an hour of lying there in Lisbon’s office, Cho dropped off his report and left the building. Jane was sure that it was fast approaching midnight. He looked over at Lisbon, who still was irritated with him. Her face was scrunched up in places and tight. She was still typing a bit hard on her keyboard and she kept cursing under her breath at every little mistake she kept making.
More time passed and Jane wondered if Lisbon’s report was going to end up being the size of a best selling novel. She’d been at it long enough. It would take Minelli days to read it! If he read it at all. He wished that Lisbon would just decide to call it a day. He was definitely ready to sleep. He doubted, though, that she was going to allow him to sleep over. She was still processing. It was in her face as well. She was still trying to figure out what to make of him.
Jane figured that she was still deciding if he was playing a game or if there was something else going on. This wasn’t a game to him, but he could see how Lisbon would be cautious of him. She at the very least, he figured, would know to trust him even if it was only a little. To believe that he wouldn’t do something as cruel as confess his love for her if it was a lie. That wasn’t the case. He loved her.
“It’ll be here in the morning, Lisbon,” Jane told her.
“It is the morning,” she pointed out.
He let out a sigh. “Really? What time is it now?”
“One-ten,” she replied sleepily.
Maybe they really had been there that long. He hadn’t thought it was quite that late. It was amazing how much time could just zoom right by when you were lying on a couch and just listening to someone be irritated at her computer. He really didn’t think anyone would be coming in the next day at their normal time. He figured that maybe noon was a good time for people to start showing up, but still leave at like four or five as long as there were no murders to investigate. Of course, this was California and he was pretty sure that murderers just didn’t take vacations… He thought it was something, though, that they should really look into.
“Come on, I’ll walk you to your car,” Jane offered.
“I may just sleep here tonight,” she said.
He could see that she was exhausted. More so than she’d let on before. Fatigue had overcome her and under her eyes were dark circles. She was beyond exhausted and there was no way that she’d be able to drive home safely. He on the other hand had napped since they’d returned.
“I’ll drive you home,” he offered.
“Jane-“
“I insist… I can come by and pick you up when you want to come back in,” he offered. He figured that that way there was no pressure. He hadn’t mentioned him crashing with her, so there was absolutely no pressure there. He was just making sure that she got home okay. He thought it was quite chivalrous.
“If you had a change of clothes, I’d say that you should just spend the night,” she told him.
He’d actually thought about suggesting she stay with him. He knew that they all kept a bag with a change of clothes in the office, but he didn’t. But he really didn’t have a place for her to stay and Red John had proved a few times that his residence just wasn’t safe. Red John’s blood stained fingerprints were all over his house. They were inerasable and apparently he was just inescapable.
“I’ll be fine,” he insisted.
“No-“
“Really… I sleep on the couch here all the time. I’m not going to freak out if my pants are wrinkly…”
Lisbon frowned a little bit and then let her face fall into the palm of her hand. “I have an iron,” she said and then let out a yawn. “You don’t have to come in with wrinkles…”
“See…all figured out,” he told her with a smile. She smiled back and he knew it was genuine. It was good to see even in her sleep deprived state. It had been a long day and it was definitely time for some rest.
He waited for Lisbon to print out her report and stapled it together before setting it on her desk. He knew that Minelli wouldn’t look at them until the next day anyways. Jane still wasn’t sure if he read them. He wouldn’t, he’d ask for the cliff notes version, which is what he was sure Minelli called an ‘update’.
Gathering himself up from the couch, he picked up his jacket and pulled it on. He watched as Lisbon pulled on her blazer and looked around sleepily, he was sure she was checking to see that she had everything. After a moment, she rounded her desk to him. Jane smiled at her and then collected her forgotten keys and cell phone from their obscured hiding places on her desk. He handed them to her and received a smile for his efforts.
“I think we’re ready now,” he said as he took her arm and put it through his. He’d happily escort her out of the building and make sure that she got home okay. After all, it was the least he could do. He also got the happy bonus of getting extra alone time with her, even if it was spent sleeping on the couch. Last time she’d allow him to share her bed (clothes on, of course), but he didn’t think that that offer would be extended once again. The couch was fine, though. He was still close by and she would have made it home safely.
…
Lisbon Residence
At five in the morning, Jane woke unexpectedly to the screams of Teresa Lisbon. He fell off the couch and hurried to her bedroom. Upon reaching the door, which was wide open, his eyes fell upon her upright form. She was panting, tears were streaming down her face, and she looked terrified. He surveyed the room quickly before entering and going directly to Lisbon’s side. The room looked undisturbed and he quickly came to the conclusion that it was probably a nightmare, an intense one.
“I’m fine,” she managed to get out between pants; her hand went up like a stop side.
Jane froze, but only for a moment. He sat on the edge of her bed and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. She was shaking and it made him worry even more. “Tell me about it,” he said after a moment as he stroked her hair and listened to her breathing. She was working on slowing it back to normal. Her tears stained his shirt, but he didn’t care. They’d dry.
“It’s stupid,” she whispered.
“Tell me about it,” he insisted as gently as possible.
“I don’t even know…it doesn’t make sense,” she told him. “I know it was Red John, but I didn’t see him.”
“You don’t know what he looks like, so that makes sense,” he reasoned.
“He was hurting you…and I couldn’t help you. I tried to shoot him, but my gun wouldn’t work. I remember checking it to make sure it had ammo and it did, but it wouldn’t shoot. It would just click and you’d scream. You told me to run, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t do anything,” she said, half crying again.
He held her closer, allowing for her face to rest against his chest. “Shhh…” he tried to soothe. “It was just a nightmare, Teresa.”
“I know…and that’s what’s stupid,” she said, pulling back away from him and wiping the tears away with her hand. “I know it’s all a nightmare… I know it wasn’t real… But it felt so real to me.”
Jane frowned. “When I was little, my mother used to distract me by having me look up at the sky… She’d point out the stars and connect them to make some kind of creature for me,” Jane shared. “And now, I’d try to distract you as well, but let’s face it… This is California and there are hardly any stars that are visible compared to when we were younger…”
Lisbon smiled a little bit. “What did she make them into?”
“Sometimes ducks or cats…and sometimes people. She liked to believe in angels…she’d say that the angels were people we loved who had gone to heaven that were looking down on us.”
“I like that story,” she said.
Jane looked at her. “You don’t seriously believe that the stars are angels, do you?”
Lisbon shrugged. “It’s nice to think at least.”
“True… It is comforting…” He held her closer. She was still relaxing. He wanted her to relax, after all, he needed to relax too after she’d practically scared him to death with her scream. He was really still recovering.
“It’s early, isn’t it?” she asked.
He could hear the exhaustion in her voice. It was heavy and her latest ordeal probably just made her even more exhausted… He was used to the nightmares…the images of the note on his bedroom door, his wife and daughter’s bodies, and the daunting smiley painted on his wall. He was used to that…the continual torture of that day… Lisbon didn’t deserve to be haunted by such horrible and cruel visions. Jane wished he could pluck the horrible memories from her head and hold onto him himself. To protect her. Of course, Lisbon would tell him that she didn’t need protecting, but Jane figured that everyone needed protecting. Whether they knew it or not.
She’d protected him.
Now, he’d look out for her…in ways that he hadn’t before.
Life was fragile…
“Go back to sleep, Teresa,” he whispered. He held her close and kissed her forehead. Her head was on his shoulder and her body was pressed against him. He rubbed her back to try to help her relax and drop back off to sleep.
“You need sleep too,” she mumbled.
Jane carefully moved over, with Lisbon still held close. He didn’t want to fall asleep himself and then end up falling off the bed and pulling Lisbon down with him. He moved some of the pillows and he covered her up with the blanket as well. He wanted her comfortable. She moved about a bit, he imagined in order for her to get comfortable and after a few minutes she seemed to have fallen asleep. Jane didn’t chance waking her by moving. He adjusted a bit so that he was comfortable as well and eventually fell asleep with Lisbon in his arms.
…
TBC…