The Joys of Motherhood
My son has been looking at me and saying "Ma-ma" for the last few days. It started out being mostly when I would put him to bed at night and refuse to pick him back up. Of course I go and comfort him when he wakes up and is upset, but the days of me picking him up constantly and bringing him to bed with either Nan or myself is over. No one was getting any good sleep and I was constantly afraid to try to go to sleep b/c I just knew as soon as I fell asleep he would wake up and that would be the end of me sleeping. The pediatrician also told me that I had to stop getting him up every few hours; that he was waking up b/c he was used to me coming to get him...that he was used to me making him a nice warm bottle when he screamed for me in the middle of the night. He said that there is no physical reason that Jake should not be able to go from his "night night" bottle to his morning bottle with no problem. It's not a case of him NEEDING a bottle, probably not even him necessarily wanting one, just that he''s become so used to getting one that he thinks it's what he's SUPPOSED to do. He actually gave up the overnight bottle fairly easily. It took less than a week for him to stop fussing for it at the same time every night (around 3-4 am). Getting him to realize that his crib is not evil and is a good place for him to sleep, though, is another story. I shouldn't say that. He's actually adapting quite well, it's just hard for me to listen to him crying even for five minutes or so. Last night, though, for the first time, he did calm himself after just a few minutes of crying and it was a beautiful thing!
Back to the Ma-ma issue, though. Today after I got him up, I brought him back to my bed to cuddle (I couldn't sleep last night and I only got about two hours of sleep before Jacob awoke for the day). We were in my bed cuddling and I must have fallen back asleep. Jacob did too, clearly, b/c the next thing I knew, it was 8:30 am (he woke up at 6) and he was laying on my stomach, patting my face and smiling. Moments like that make it all worthwhile. It was just such a precious moment. So I took him out to the living room and Nan wanted to feed him breakfast. I gave him to her and instead of cuddling her like he usually does, he started twisting and turning in her arms, reaching for me and yelling Ma-ma, ma-ma. It was so sweet. I took him back and he wrapped his chubby little arms around my neck and snuggled his little head against it. I love the feel of his warm little baby breath against my neck.
Another good day today from an emotional standpoint as well as a physical one. I folded tons of laundry (we really need to stop waiting until we are all almost completely out of clothes to do laundry). I also went to the grocery store and picked up a pizza for dinner. All simple little things for most people, but I don't take those things for granted anymore. It's a BIG deal for me to be able to do those things. I feel so accomplished today.
Okay, was going to write more, but I'm literally falling asleep while I write. Not good. Going to bed now.